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Cocks

No, not about my feathered friends this time. 

Inspired by the boobs thread I thought I’d start a knob one. So ladies (and gents) - large or small? Hairy? Circumcised? 

I’ll start. Following years of research (watching naked attraction) I would say the larger the knob the less the bloke bothers to try and do anything useful with it. They think it’s just enough to have a big one and that you should be grateful - nah. 
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Comments

  • Roundhead or cavalier?
  • Roundhead or cavalier?
    It’s no skin off my nose. 
  • f f s .. the silly season is in full swing
  • The thing is how would you like no overcoat in the winter.
  • I have a big cock, it's known as @clb74
  • Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
  • RedChaser said:
    Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
    Yes Kenneth.


    Are you alright mate?
  • No wonder your arse is in tatters if you’re this obsessed with cocks. 

    This is the only only type of cock that’s been near my arse

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  • RedChaser said:
    Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
    Yes Kenneth.


    Are you alright mate?
    All good thanks Elfs, I tend not to post so much on footballing matters during the close season. Recharging the batteries for the campaign and hopefully new dawn ahead post the duct taped cretin, fingers crossed.
  • No wonder your arse is in tatters if you’re this obsessed with cocks. 

    This is the only only type of cock that’s been near my arse

    Blimey 
  • RedChaser said:
    RedChaser said:
    Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
    Yes Kenneth.


    Are you alright mate?
    All good thanks Elfs, I tend not to post so much on footballing matters during the close season. Recharging the batteries for the campaign and hopefully new dawn ahead post the duct taped cretin, fingers crossed.
    Obviously following my lead...........................
  • RedChaser said:
    RedChaser said:
    Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
    Yes Kenneth.


    Are you alright mate?
    All good thanks Elfs, I tend not to post so much on footballing matters during the close season. Recharging the batteries for the campaign and hopefully new dawn ahead post the duct taped cretin, fingers crossed.
    Obviously following my lead...........................
    Can you keep on topic please Elfs 
  • RedChaser said:
    RedChaser said:
    Stig said:

    Oh stop it! 
    Yes Kenneth.


    Are you alright mate?
    All good thanks Elfs, I tend not to post so much on footballing matters during the close season. Recharging the batteries for the campaign and hopefully new dawn ahead post the duct taped cretin, fingers crossed.
    Obviously following my lead...........................
    Can you keep on topic please Elfs 
    Sorry, that cock is a beauty in the previous picture.
  • No wonder your arse is in tatters if you’re this obsessed with cocks. 

    This is the only only type of cock that’s been near my arse

    I'm not sure that reads quite how you meant it.

    Which reminds me, a feather is kinky put a chicken is perverted.
  • f f s .. the silly season is in full swing
    Cheer up mate, the sun is out.
  • It was once reported that London actor John Bindon's party trick was to be able to balance a pint (maybe it was a half) of lager on his wang.
    A performance he showed to Princess Margaret on her Caribbean island holiday home.
  • f f s .. the silly season is in full swing
    Cheer up mate, the sun is out.
    grrrrrrrrrrrrrr … ((:<) ((:>)
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  • Carter said:
    Jim Jeffries has this right 

    Girls don't want to put dicks that have cultivated all sorts of visible and non visible bacteria and smegma (Google it) in their mouths. So a circumcised penis is the way forward, much cleaner and no chance of doing what my mate woodsy did in tearing his foreskin like a unwanted till receipt. We call him rumple splitskin now.

    True story, a mate of mine had a penis reduction. This mans cock is legendary, nobody would stand in a urinal next to him. When he settled down with his gorgeous lady wife he was causing her too much discomfort so had it reduced by a couple of inches. Apparatus like his come along once in a generation although his dad reckons it runs in the family. 

    The procedure he told us didn't alter the appearance and his actual corey wasn't touched. The operation focused on his arse as that is where the penis begins. 

    For the record, he showed us all his chod post OP and it was still something that could be seen from space. 

    He used to be a male stripper too and I reckon this thing would intimidate as many women as it would arouse. He's a few years older than me and when he was still 0layig football he would help us out and roll back the years sealing up our defence whilst terrifying everyone into waiting until he had finished in the showers before the rest of us went in. It wasn't difficult, you'd hear screams coming from the showers before hearing the 'slap, slap, slap' as he left the showers and entered the changing room. 

    I used to tell everyone that he was the freak and we were all normal. It didnt stop his penis from being the thing of legend.  One of his party tricks, which he doesn't do anymore would be to hang this cable in a pint glass and the trick of the liquid refraction would make it look somehow even bigger. He's had to stop doing that now as pub staff in Medway are aware of Deano and his rope so keep a close eye on him and their glassware. I'm pretty sure everyone that hasn't seen it wants to have a glance just to see if the stories are true. 

    I used to tell people when he wasn't using it for injuring his wife or for pissing he rented it to the local highway authority to use as a speed bump. I'm also sure he used to feed it mice 
    Best post ever. Give this fella a promote.

    As an aside, I would not dare have a reduction of 2".
  • What a load of old cock !
  • edited June 2019
    I'm not going to talk about mine @arsentatters, but I can show you  ;)

    Edit. Jeez, just read that back and what felt like innocuous cheeky banter when I typed it now looks a tad creepy in print.
    Move along folks (literally) nothing to see here.  :D
  • Sadly my cock does not crow at dawn anymore
  • Sadly my cock does not crow at dawn anymore
    Mine gave that up years ago.
  • Should at least go pass your belly button, £15k to have it extended or only £1k to  have your belly button dropped 4 inch.
  • edited June 2019
    If you don't have a foreskin you dont know what you're missing. Also doesn't take much to wash it so the cleanliness stuff is just nonsense put about by those who want to mutilate young boys. Obviously some need to be circumcised due to non retraction etc, but they are in the minority.
  • I'm glad I did not start this thread.
  • If you don't have a foreskin you dont know what you're missing. Also doesn't take much to wash it so the cleanliness stuff is just nonsense put about by those who want to mutilate young boys. Obviously some need to be circumcised due to non retraction etc, but they are in the minority.
    I think this is my favourite ever post on this website. The opening line is genius.

    When I was at uni in America, my mates were amazed that I wasn’t circumcised. It was often the topic of conversation in the showers after a game. However, the women didn’t seem to mind it.
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