So what will Tuesdays statement be about?
Comments
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We are selling up and leaving!!!!!! (Oh all right, I know, but I can dream can't I?)1
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A promise to improve the match day experience by installing shelves in the toilets to facilitate coke-snorting?5
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Due to the weird (meaning expensive) protests by fans who want the club relegated, all season-ticket holders and people who have bought tickets will be banned from the Valley until the end of the season. The stands will be filled by loyal staff who will run really fast from seat to seat to make the stadium appear full. God bless our glorious leader - building a better future together forever.10
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Mr Tatters has just put a shelf up in the toilet - should I be worried?cafcfan said:A promise to improve the match day experience by installing shelves in the toilets to facilitate coke-snorting?
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A club statement concerning the latest protest will be released once completed.Karim_myBagheri said:We've been fortunate to be addressed by our supreme leader and his customer relations team a couple of times now. What will be the next output by the ever popular better together Tuesday statement?
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Dear Customers,
Last Saturday, some individuals did not come to The Valley to watch the game and support the team, but came to mistreat defenceless animals. Mistreatment, allegedly, needed to drive change in ownership and management.
Whom would they expect the dog-cat to be sold to? How long would a sales process take? Is it easier to sell a cat-dog when it is dead or alive?
Some individuals seem to want the cat-dog to die. This is a confused approach, since following this logic leads to exactly the opposite of what we all want: living dog-cats.
Allegations regarding the CEO are misrepresented* and are continuously used as a method to discredit and fuel personal abuse, hatred and with a risk to safety. Particularly the safety of cat-dogs.
Although certain individuals tell you it does not happen, in recent weeks Roland Duchatelet has stroked many dog-cats, the CEO has donated to 37 cat-dog charities, and the communications team have each adopted several dog-cats. We will continue caring for these animals in the hope they will somehow solve all our problems.
We have 9 lives left.
We still have the chance to make it happen with the support of the fans until the very last game. We must believe it is still possible. Every football fan knows the cat-dog is a crucial factor in the success on the pitch.
*I think the difference is also because fans don't see themselves as pet owners and {…} they go to the zoo with their families every week and if they don't see a dog-cat will they go and scream to the people in charge of it? No they don't, but they do it with a football club and that's very weird (meaning unique) because they feel a sense of ownership of the dog-cat and think somehow engaging it with the pitch will help us incorporate them into the decisions of the club {…}.
Roland Dog-Cat-elet.43 -
Brilliant. Post of the weekrikofold said:Dear Customers,
Last Saturday, some individuals did not come to The Valley to watch the game and support the team, but came to mistreat defenceless animals. Mistreatment, allegedly, needed to drive change in ownership and management.
Whom would they expect the dog-cat to be sold to? How long would a sales process take? Is it easier to sell a cat-dog when it is dead or alive?
Some individuals seem to want the cat-dog to die. This is a confused approach, since following this logic leads to exactly the opposite of what we all want: living dog-cats.
Allegations regarding the CEO are misrepresented* and are continuously used as a method to discredit and fuel personal abuse, hatred and with a risk to safety. Particularly the safety of cat-dogs.
Although certain individuals tell you it does not happen, in recent weeks Roland Duchatelet has stroked many dog-cats, the CEO has donated to 37 cat-dog charities, and the communications team have each adopted several dog-cats. We will continue caring for these animals in the hope they will somehow solve all our problems.
We have 9 lives left.
We still have the chance to make it happen with the support of the fans until the very last game. We must believe it is still possible. Every football fan knows the cat-dog is a crucial factor in the success on the pitch.
*I think the difference is also because fans don't see themselves as pet owners and {…} they go to the zoo with their families every week and if they don't see a dog-cat will they go and scream to the people in charge of it? No they don't, but they do it with a football club and that's very weird (meaning unique) because they feel a sense of ownership of the dog-cat and think somehow engaging it with the pitch will help us incorporate them into the decisions of the club {…}.
Roland Dog-Cat-elet.4 -
Dear fans,
We know what we are doing, you don't
Katrien and Cahones are magic.
You lot are weird, we are not
I have had several clubs ask me about our business model but won't tell who they are
Remember, I don't do failure, that's why I bought this club
I would like to write more but I am to busy with meetings with the target 20k group this week
Love
Role land
ps
Thuram is better than Hamer and Peter Parsley is better than Yann, so there5 -
It will be a joint CAFC/MI5 statement advising fans that all future protests could result it waterboarding and/or a long spell in Guantanamo Bay10
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Sponsored links:
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Have I missed something? What statement?0
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rikofold said:
Dear Customers,
Last Saturday, some individuals did not come to The Valley to watch the game and support the team, but came to mistreat defenceless animals. Mistreatment, allegedly, needed to drive change in ownership and management.
Whom would they expect the dog-cat to be sold to? How long would a sales process take? Is it easier to sell a cat-dog when it is dead or alive?
Some individuals seem to want the cat-dog to die. This is a confused approach, since following this logic leads to exactly the opposite of what we all want: living dog-cats.
Allegations regarding the CEO are misrepresented* and are continuously used as a method to discredit and fuel personal abuse, hatred and with a risk to safety. Particularly the safety of cat-dogs.
Although certain individuals tell you it does not happen, in recent weeks Roland Duchatelet has stroked many dog-cats, the CEO has donated to 37 cat-dog charities, and the communications team have each adopted several dog-cats. We will continue caring for these animals in the hope they will somehow solve all our problems.
We have 9 lives left.
We still have the chance to make it happen with the support of the fans until the very last game. We must believe it is still possible. Every football fan knows the cat-dog is a crucial factor in the success on the pitch.
*I think the difference is also because fans don't see themselves as pet owners and {…} they go to the zoo with their families every week and if they don't see a dog-cat will they go and scream to the people in charge of it? No they don't, but they do it with a football club and that's very weird (meaning unique) because they feel a sense of ownership of the dog-cat and think somehow engaging it with the pitch will help us incorporate them into the decisions of the club {…}.
Roland Dog-Cat-elet.3 -
I would be, it'll completely knacker the effectiveness of the flush...Arsenetatters said:
Mr Tatters has just put a shelf up in the toilet - should I be worried?cafcfan said:A promise to improve the match day experience by installing shelves in the toilets to facilitate coke-snorting?
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Please, please let there be beach balls, stress balls, CARD apparel and general rebelliousness on show.
I thought this was the fans forum but I think not now.
What statement is it?0 -
Thank you for the stress balls... I was going to resign under the pressure from the fans but thanks to your unique generosity I've found a way to stay calm under pressure1
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Can't wait.0
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Does he come out of the toilet completely off his face, and yet he seemed fine before he went in? :-)Arsenetatters said:
Mr Tatters has just put a shelf up in the toilet - should I be worried?cafcfan said:A promise to improve the match day experience by installing shelves in the toilets to facilitate coke-snorting?
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An announcement that the teams on the big screen will be replaced by a chant to support our greater leader Roland.
http://youtu.be/RPpv9lAtr8M 1 -
He does indeed! I just assumed it was my cooking3blokes said:
Does he come out of the toilet completely off his face, and yet he seemed fine before he went in? :-)Arsenetatters said:
Mr Tatters has just put a shelf up in the toilet - should I be worried?cafcfan said:A promise to improve the match day experience by installing shelves in the toilets to facilitate coke-snorting?
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Maybe his shit smells?0
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Sponsored links:
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What statement? Where have they said there will be one?0
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They'll just copy and paste Belgiumbun's post.2
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Is it to say we are following Villas lead by charging people 5 pounds should they leave a game early.0
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The_President said:
Is it to say we are following Villas lead by charging people 5 pounds should they leave a game early.
Wooosh?
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