Millwall reported 'again' to The FA.

Hitler only had one ball !

Goebbles had no balls at all !

he must have been clever then cos he had 5 kids ? well Mrs Goebals did

I never know whether its Himmler or Goebbles who had no balls at all to be hones. At least we can be sure millwall have at least one.

According to Wiki (yes I know) lots of versions the most popular of which is


Hitler has only got one ball,
Göring has two but very small,
Himmler is somewhat sim'lar,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.

But I always thought the 2nd line was "the other is in the Albert Hall" along with the 4000 holes from Blackburn no doubt.

no no no

One was in the Albert Hall after his mum cut if off when he was small----------------------tough upbringing,early anti smacking law in Austria , which resulted in Mrs H chopin her sons testical off instead.

From WIkipedia

All versions are sung to the tune of The Colonel Bogey March:

* The Colonel Bogey March MIDI file

[edit] Claimed original version, credited to Toby O'Brien

Göring has only got one ball
Hitler's [are] so very small
Himmler's so very similar
And Goebbels has no balls at all

This version, thought to be the original, is interesting in that Göring has the one ball and Hitler apparently has two and that it starts with Göring. The musical comedy word play of rhyming Goebbels with "no balls" both argue in favour of this being a very early version.

[edit] Variant stanzas about Nazis

Variant number 1 (The most common variant)

Hitler has only got one ball,
Göring has two but very small,
Himmler is somewhat sim'lar,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.

(In line 3, "somewhat" was sometimes replaced by "rather". The first line may also be one left ball, one brass ball, one big ball; approximately this version appears in Thomas Pynchon's V.. There is also an alternative to line 3: "Hess has even less,")


Variant number 2

Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is on the kitchen wall,
His mother, the dirty bugger,
Chopped it off when he was small.

(Outside of the United Kingdom, the second line is oft invoked as "The other is on the kitchen wall" or "The other is hanging on the wall". Some areas of the United Kingdom alter the second line to include local buildings. Mancunians use "The other is in the Free Trade Hall", whereas Londoners use "the Albert Hall")

Variant Number 3

Hitler has only got one ball,
Rommel has two but very small,
Himmler, has something similliar,
But Montgomery has no balls at all.

Other variations include use of the past tense, referring to Goebbels as Doctor, Hitler's other ball being "on the wall", mixtures of the variants above, and Hitler's life being "much simpler if he didn't have any at all".

[edit] Second verses: Hitler's mother

When the first verse includes Hitler's mother, a second verse is generally added:

She threw it over Germany,
It landed in the deep blue sea,
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea.

or

She threw it into a conker tree
It missed and went into to the sea
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea.

[edit] Verses about Germany and Germans

These verses mention neither Nazis nor Hitler:

Frankfurt has only one beer hall,
Stuttgart, die München all on call,
Munich, vee lift our tunich,
To show vee "Cherman" have no balls at all.

Hans Otto is very short, not tall,
And blotto, for drinking Singhai and Skol.
A "Cherman", unlike Bruce Erwin,
Because Hans Otto has no balls at all.

[edit] Introductory verse

(Sung to the tune of Land of Hope and Glory, and followed by some variant of the Nazi verses, above.)

Land of soap and water,
Hitler's having a bath.
Churchill's looking through the keyhole,
Having a jolly good laugh

Be..e..e..e..cause...

Hitler — has only [etc]

[cite]Posted By: SoundAsa£[/cite]You know when I posted that I just knew someone sooner or later was going to turn the converation that way...looks like it was sooner! LOL.
Anyway going back to the original point, I am still somewhat puzzled why the non return of the ball should have held play up long enough for the ref to have felt the need to report them, surely another one would have been immediately available to have made that unnecessary...idiots!

Times are hard

Henry you need to get out more ;-)

Face bovvered ? ;-)

So if the spanners only have one,
how many does Jordan have ?

[quote][cite]Posted By: ShootersHillGuru[/cite]Hitler only had one ball ![/quote]

For those of us with only one ball this is most a most upsetting thread

Curb-It so does Tav know this "lad" gets his bits out in front of you ? Does it ping when its hit with a cricket bat ?

Strange this so when some one says "table tennis " does he run like f**k or get a movement on ?