Counting the Days 'Til Roland Duchatelet Sells Charlton Athletic

NomadicAddick said:

@3blokes You really deserve this moment..

Day 1 and 2

It’s another Saturday morning in the shed, and the Best Not Owner Of A Football Club Ever is sitting at his bench with his coffee and little amaretto biscuit.

He keeps going to pick up the cup, but today, he cannot help feeling that something, somehow, is not quite right.

He should be feeling happy, he thinks. He has finally shifted that shitty shit kloob off to some other poor dimwitted sap, and he has just gone  and splashed out on a new box of rivets to celebrate. He knows he should be sitting there happily counting them.

But somehow they seem to hold little interest for him this morning.

Just then Mrs. B.O comes in.

“ Oh,” she says in surprise, surveying the full cup. “ You’ve hardly touched your coffee. What’s the matter? Can you taste the sedative?”

The B.O shakes his head slowly.

“ No dear, “ he replies “ I just have this strange sensation that, I don’t know, that somehow I’ve ...missed....something”

“ What, apart from all those managers?” says Mrs B.O. staring at him. “ Yes, you have missed something. Something momentous. The chance you had to create something special, memorable, something life affirming in your world. If you had opened your heart and mind to what you actually had at the ‘shitty shit kloob’, you would have realised you could have joined and steered a community to great moments, for them and for you, and they, in turn, would have followed you through walls.”

The B.O looks up at her and puts his hand to his head.

“ Oh my God, of course!” He cries. “ Oh God! Yes! I can suddenly see as clear as day, exactly what I’ve missed! How could I have been such a fucking idiot?!!!”

Mrs. B.O. looks at him in surprise.

“ Really?” she says, with a gasp.

“ Yes! Yes! Of course!” cries the B.O, standing up, his eyes shining with a faraway look as he moves to the door.

Mrs B.O gives a start.

“ Wait...you aren’t.....going to try and buy the club back again, are you?” she whispers. 

The B.O looks at her in amazement.

“Fuck off!” he cries. “ No, I knew I was missing something! A box of 2” galvanised nails! I bought them with the rivets yesterday but I’ve bloody left them in the car!”

He goes over to the door and disappears from view with a demented cackle. She hears him fall over a rake outside.

Mrs B.O stands there for a moment, then lets out a sigh. Finally she picks up the coffee cup, and with the minimum of fuss, she drops his little amaretto biscuit on to the floor and carefully steps on it.

Satisfied, she goes to leave, taking one long last look round the shed. It has served its purpose, she thinks. 

It’s been somewhere to put an idiot.

So let us now say a final goodbye to the B.O. and Mrs B.O., may all their mensen be domme, and may all our Christmases now be bright.

He’s not here any more. He’s gone.

Thank fuck.

So, thanks to everyone who’s read this thread and for the nice comments, along the way. I hope it helped keep your spirits up, when it all seemed a bit hopeless, I know it was often quite cathartic for me to visit the B.O. shed and recount his adventures.

There are some episodes that never saw the light of day, including the B.O. playing Monopoly with his grandchildren, and building hotels on all their properties and a Roly version of Ernie, called Roly The Least Seen Owner In The West, but I can’t find it at the mo. I was going to finish this thread on that.

Anyway, what I did find was these two efforts which I’ve combined for now and they feel like a fitting way to end this. The first one was originally intended to raise money for the Upbeats, and I might try and do that in the New Year with The Covered End Choir Take 2.

All the best everyone.

Onwards and upwards.

https://youtu.be/qRXCkcFtkKE