Is the headline in the Fiver tonight, and here's the piece that goes with it
THE FUTURE'S BRIGHT, THE CHAIRMAN'S ORANGE
Wouldn't it be more entertaining if, when football clubs "unveiled"
new managers, they went about it in a more literal way. You'd have a
bloke concealed under a sheet behind the top table in a room full of
hacks who don't know his identity, the chairman would arrive and,
after a short countdown to build suspense, whip the sheet off and -
TA-DAAA! - there's Micky Adams looking pleased as punch to be back in
gainful employment again.
Of course it would be even more fun if the chairman whipped the sheet
off a big Perspex box, to reveal David O'Leary, Bryan Robson and John
Gregory perched nervously above a big tank of gunge. Joan Laporta or
whoever would then pull a big lever, deposit the two unsuccessful
candidates in the sticky goo and leave the triumphant new manager to
field questions from the press.
Oh, it would be amusing, but probably not as funny as the Tango-tinged
complexion-and-blond-bob combo sported by Crystal Palace chairman
Simon Jordan when he introduced Neil Warnock as Crystal Palace's
216th manager in seven years this morning. "I am in a situation where
I've got the man I want," declared Jordan, who looks more and more
like his married-to-Peter Andre namesake with each passing week.
"Neil has been on my radar a long time - even before Iain Dowie came
on board - because he represents everything I want in a football
manager. He's a winner and has a desire to be successful."
Warnock's a winner all right, having accumulated six promotions, three
manager of the month awards and the gong for Hartlepool player of the
year in 1972. Having revealed that he'd had "the best part of five or
six" other job offers, Warnock revealed that he'd taken the Palace
job because Jordan is a long-time friend and because "all the
conditions here makes this the one challenge that I couldn't say no
to". Unlike rapping with James 'AC Jimbo' Richardson on Friday
evenings - a challenge Warnock will presumably have to give up. "Some
TV companies may edit this out, but I've been working with Setanta
and that's been great," he revealed, as if to suggest Sky would be
childish enough to overlook his spell working in the media, just
because it was for their main rivals. "That was Neil Warnock there
with a lot to say, having not had a voice in football for four or
five months now," declared the bloke in the Sky Sports News studio.
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Comments
LOL!
The Fiver is the Guardian's email bulletin Large.
With Colin in command I can see Palace V Brighton derbies coming a lot quicker than the nigels or the tango twathead thought they would. How's about the Jills for a rival chaps??
The Poll on the CPFC.org has less than 8% of the 500 + votes that are anti warnock.... that must be your work mates.
This is just what we needed, I'm delighted we have Warnock.... I'll actually look forward to watching Palace again.
I thought the Gills were your true rivals ;-)
Of course all fans try to rationalise the appointment of a new manager but Palace fans do seem to have mastered it to an incrediable degree. Maybe they have just had more practive than most.