What football cliches really wind you up?
Mine include:
Anfields European atmosphere
West Hams 'academy'
The North East has the most passionate fans in country
West Ham 'won the world cup'
And any free kick Engalnd get in the opposition half being 'Beckham territory'
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Comments
Geordies are passionate
Man City fans are passionate
Palarse are the team of the 80's
Agent McCarthy is/was a defender
Im an Arsenal fan
Im a gooner
all above have me looking 4 the petrol can.
NO!!!!
You get to the premiership by winning matches and Leeds (just one example of a "big" club) have no more right to be in the prem than Rochdale or us!
what the feck does that mean
1966/the world cup in any tournament entered by England
<Insert manager's name> has lost the changing room
Early doors
We bossed the first half...
Obviously
At the end of the day...
Handbags at five paces...
That magical night in Barcelona/Moscow
The glottal stop
The use of nouns instead of verbs
I tell you wot, there isn't a blade of grass he hasn't covered tonight
Bouncebackability
Setting out their stall...
Shock as in Player X has transferred from one club to another in a shock transfer, or a team has been ko'd from the FA cup in a shock result
Minnows/romance of the cup/giant killers
Plucky little... to desribe a team who draw away from home against a Premier league outfit
The big number four - as used by acommentator who's forgotten that player's name
Naive defending
When Sky cover a match, even if it's the most on-sided game of the season they do their best to talk up the losing team presumably to keep the fans from switching off, similarly the direst game if the season is talked up as though it's an exciting game.
He's gonna get the hairdryer treatment for that...
"Credit" as in credit to the player for going in there/for the keeper pulling off a great save...
"He's held his hands up..."
It was the last pass that let them/him down
That would of been 2-0 had it gone in...
so i will start it now atleast we are still 6th in in the play offf places
take one game at a time.
and scotty parker's favourite "you know"
It's either a chance or it isn't. good chance, slim chance, great chance, poor chance but it is still a chance
"If that was a couple of foot to the left it would have been on target"
or
"If he kept his head over it that would have been on target"
or
"If the goalkeeper didnt get a hand to that it would have been a certain goal"
"Good spirit in the changing room"
"Good bunch of lads" (from new signing wishing to ingratiate himself)
"At this stage of my career" (player seeking a move / more dosh)
"I've always had a good relationship with the fans here" (as above, hoping not to get slagged off)
"One or two things to be ironed out" (I want more dosh)
"Och! Look at that" (gasp as famous Brazillian with good name & flamboyant haircut takes throw-in)
"At this level"
"A little naive" (as young unheard of player misses good chance)
"A little rusty" (as above Brazillian misses easier chance)
really ? can i ask why ?
its just that you've prepared for it for five days, collectively been payed around £200k, travelled by plane, stayed in a 5-star hotel, had someone massaging your legs before the game, had supporters who sing your name spend up to a half their weekly wage, have a fitness coach get you into shape, various other coaches assist with your development, and operate in a feng sui training ground that wards off bad spirits.
So to be honest, i wouldn't mind a bit of expansion on why "you never got going" please.....