The government believes it has identified nine types of heavy internet forum poster as it launches a new 'get a life' campaign.
Research by the Department of Health in England with focus groups found heavy posters often fell into one of a number of categories.
These ranged from de-stress and depressed posters to people who posted to wind other people up, or to bond.
Experts said helping people to understand the reasons for their posting habits was "very useful".
THE NINE TYPES OF POSTER
Depressed poster
This poster, although grounded to a certain extent, and immune from hype, often posts to try and lift the black clouds descending on them, by and by pointing out flaws in any optimists' opinions. The effects of these posters can sometimes be crushing, and other posters may resort to abuse, or 'threats' to stop visiting the site.
'Rose-Tinted' poster
Conversely, these will try and turn around a discussion of any subject, no matter how obviously worrying and dire, by posting completely unrealistic over-enthusiastic, often berating all other views. While trying to keep the board buoyant with their 'god-botherer-esque' optimism, they could also invite reactions, such as the above.
'Keyboard Warrior' poster
Often follow specific posters around forums etc, sometimes 'offering them out' or using a volley of personal abuse. Probably still at home with their mum.
Conformist poster
Posts regularly, but rarely starts a new conversation etc, preferring to agree with others (see also bonding). Often uses the phrase "What xxxxxx said".
Inadequate Poster
Not to be confused with 'Keyboard Warrior', though traits sometimes overlap. A poster who feels they have to show their 'intellectual prowess' over an internet forum to counter feelings of inadequacy (which they will deny vehemently). From one-line answers, to lengthy essays, nearly *every* post will have in it will have some sort of 'boast' in it, an attempt to goad a poster, or patronisingly express some sort of (self-assumed) 'superiority' over other posters. They use a messageboard not so much to bond with others (though they will do this, usually with a couple of posters with identical personalities, with whom in-jokes are often shared in 'public'), but to 'take on' others. Even throwaway threads about trivial matters will be answered deliberately with something they deem to be the most 'impressive'. Probably jolly nice blokes/women in 'real life'.
Obsessive Poster
Quantity, not quality here! Posts as much as humanly possible. Much more than the 'regular faces'. Either in a very cushy job, a mind-numbingly boring job, or in his pyjamas all day in a bedsit. Either way, does little work, and looks at their post count with pride.
Bonding Poster
Genuinely has a laugh, sees the forum as a fun time to pass the day, and make new friends/ drinking partners. Likes the fact that all sorts of subjects are discussed, and participates regularly.
'Wind-up' Poster
Posters who go to great lengths to rile certain people, by inventing completely untrue stories, or deliberately playing devils advocate in threads which raise emotion. Politics, immigration and whether Leaburn was really any good, are pretty good bets.
The Self-Deprecating Poster
Weirdos who try and do a comical take on a previous post, such as an article about a relatively serious subj.... oh... hang on........
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Comments
I would hope I'm a "Bonding" poster but probably others rather than oneself should be the judge!
Another thread maybe?
Think I'm conformist but could be accused of being Rose Tinted. Could think of someone in each of the categories which I'm sure Boggsy did.
Reminiscent of early Bertold Brecht ; - )
man i'll just get me coat!