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Tomorrow's Headlines Today - Charlton v Palace

edited January 2009 in General Charlton
Do your worst guys !

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    Charlton Pathetic Mauled Again.

    Eagles Take Roost At Valley

    Etc etc
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    Eagles soare at The Valley


    Crystal Palace came away with a valuable 3 points at one of their bitterest rivals last night, after on loan Tom Soares turned and volleyed a thunderous 30 yard shot into his own net, to give palace a 2-1 win, compounded even further by the fact that he celebrated at the Jimmy Seed end of the ground with the travelling contingent, this, after scoring Charlton's early goal to take the lead with a header from a corner, after which he quietly returned to the centre circle for kick off without one sign of jubilation.

    Pardkinson said "It was a great volley by Tom", we can still get out of this if he keeps playing like that"
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    Oi DA9 that ain't funny lol

    Addicks clip the Eagles wings in their fight for the drop.
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    RACON ROLL

    A late brace from substitute Tierry Racon gave Charlton hope of survival and their fans jiving in the aisles fter this thrilling 2-1 victory
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    [cite]Posted By: Ledge[/cite]Oi DA9 that ain't funny lol

    Addicks clip the Eagles wings in their fight for the drop.

    I really wish I was trying to be funny fella.
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    NIGEL STINK

    In amazing circumstances, the South London Derby was abandoned after 12 minutes as an almighty stink filtered through the Valley, leaving 4 players with breathing problems. At first it was believed to be the result of a gas leak in the Charlton Heights area, but after investigation it was proved to be the collective wiff of 3,000 unwashed Palace fans.

    The game has been re-arranged for 21 February, with the travelling fans granted a severely reduced allocation.
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    eagles ship 9 AGAIN

    chris dickson scored a terrific 9 goal haul against the stripey mugs from up the road


    still not assured of his stating place
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    "Palace gone for a Burton" - prolific Deon grabs five in 7-0 Charlton romp
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    Addicks Make Mediocre Performance Matter

    Having maligned his teams lack of penalty decisions the malingering addicks boss Phil Parkinson derived of modicum of amusement as his team gave a medicocre performance only to be mysteriously merited two dubious penalties in the last ten minutes.
    Moreover it looked like more misery for they addicks as they nearly threw away the chance of a massive boost as misfiring striker Deon Burton miscued his spotkick.Thankfully a makeshift striker in the form of the much maligned Mark Hudson stepped up to make sure of the points and send the majority of the crowd home with a minimal yet more optomistic belief in survival.
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    Scum Puppies Go Wild

    Strange events at SE7 last night saw the game stopped for 25 minutes whilst stewards attempted to cajole 15 chihuahua puppies off the pitch and back into the waiting arms of Palace chairman Simon Jordan. He said they were a present for his partner. One dog for every man she had slept with. He had picked them up that afternoon and had not had time to take them home.

    Rumours from the Valley late last night also suggested that the dogs had been drunk at the time due to former Addicks 'keeper Bob Bolder plying them with guiness whenever Jordan's back was turned.
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    SPANKING FROM THE SOARING DICKO

    Chris Dickson scored 4 times in a randy affair last night at The Valley. The ever solid Tom Soares set each goal up for Dickson, who had been sat shrivelled up on a cold Addicks bench until the 92nd minute, when he was aided in his warm up by an unknown female member of the crowd. The ex-Dulwich & Hamlet star got stuck right in and had an explosive 2 minutes, leading to wild gestures directed at the Jimmy Seed which later saw him arrested and fined £45,000,000.
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    A poachers brace from Derek Hales and a last minute effort from Mike Flanagan, latching onto a pinpoint cross from Colin Powell after great creative midfield play from Keith Peacock sent the Covered End into raptures and the few remaining Glaziers fans in a crowd of 7,856 back to the bus stop to catch the 75 bus back to oblivion.

    "Back to the 70's....were going back to the 70's"
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    Floodlight failure saves Charlton

    Charlton playing with 8 men after three red cards were saved in the 87th minute by a floodlight failure as Palace were coasting to a 5-0 win. A furious Warnock stormed out of The Valley, while Charlton manager, Parkinson, said that this could be the turning point adding that he could see light at the end of the tunnel.
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    DICKSON PLAYS FROM START.

    Charlton win - That is all.
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    edited January 2009
    .
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    DUTCH LUCK AS HOLLAND SINKS THE ADDICKS

    Charlton go down to their bitter local rivals as happless Matt Holland nets into his own goal on the 92nd minute.
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    [quote][cite]Posted By: thai malaysia addick[/cite]Floodlight failure saves Charlton

    Charlton playing with 8 men after three red cards were saved in the 87th minute by a floodlight failure as Palace were coasting to a 5-0 win. A furious Warnock stormed out of The Valley, while Charlton manager, Parkinson, said that this could be the turning point adding that he could see light at the end of the tunnel.[/quote]

    The light at the end of the tunnel? I suppose if it was on a different circuit to the floodlights :)
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    Sadly it is set up for: Super Palace Go Balistic: Charlton Are Atrocious

    Prove me wrong Deon et al.
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    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]DUTCH LUCK AS HOLLAND SINKS THE ADDICKS

    Charlton go down to their bitter local rivals as happless Matt Holland nets into his own goal on the 92nd minute.

    Blimey, you're a bundle of joy this morning!
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    ALLS WELL THAT ATWELL FOR PALACE.

    Charlton seem to be heading for their first win since October when a bizzare refereeing decision allowed Crystal Palace back into a tension filled south london derby,the turning moment came goalkeeper Elliott was pulled up for handling outside his area,the keeper was sent off and the visitors scored from the free kick but replays show that the luckless custodian was inside his area,the goal cancelling out CHRIS DICKSONS world class strike.

    It wasn't Atwells only gaffe as he turned down three strong appeals for penalties from Charlton all of which were later proved to be penalties on viewing of the replays.

    The 26 year old official further incensed the home faithful when he allowed a clear foul by DERRY on AMBROSE to go unpunished,DERRY then slotted the ball to NICK CARLE who was clearly in an offside position,the midfielder slotted past substitue keeper RANDOLPH with ease to send the 3000 visiting supporters into rapture and the home fans into fury which boiled over at the full time whistle when several fans tried to invade the pitch to remonstrate with referee ATWELL.

    And yes it is slow in the office today :)
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    [cite]Posted By: Clem_Snide[/cite]Charlton Pathetic Mauled Again.

    Mauled like this??
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    edited January 2009
    CHARLTON HOPES GONE FOR A BURTON

    Charlton's slender hopes of staying in the Championship took a further knock as hapless striker Deon Burton missed three clear chances to score. The frustrated Valley crowd were heard chanting DICKO, DICKO, DICKO

    It is unclear whether they were insulting manager Phil Parkinson or requesting the introduction of substitute Chris Dickson.

    Either way a grim night for the inhabitants of SE7.
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    edited January 2009
    McCARTHY PARK:

    McCarthy Parky's Saviour As Someone Left The Kuqi In The Rain
    The Charlton faithful delighted in chanting "Who Are Ya?" at the Palace manager when he slipped in a puddle. Well, whoever he is, they should be grateful to him for making a bigger slip by leaving the hapless Shefki Kuqi on the pitch to spurn chance after chance - until a late own-goal from Paddy McCarthy handed Charlton's manager his first league win.
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    Spring-time at the Valley

    Matt Spring came off the bench to net an 82nd minute winner that left the Valley faithful in raptures and ended a winter of discontent. Spring's rifle shot from 25 yards stunned both sets of fans, who had already switched off and were waiting for the whistle to end the previous 81 minutes of dire football. After Spring's stunning strike both sides had clear chances but neither side failed to convert and the Addicks took the points. After the game Neil Warnock revealed that Jamie Scowcroft would be joining the Addicks before the close of the transfer window and Kelly Youga would be moving the other way to SE25.
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    Suicide rate soars in SE London
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    Addicks stuff Eagles

    3-1 to the Addicks and Parky claimed he always knew Dicko would come good

    2 for Dicko and one for Shelvey

    Early lead for Palace scored by Scannell
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    [cite]Posted By: mart77[/cite]Spring-time at the Valley

    Matt Spring came off the bench to net an 82nd minute winner that left the Valley faithful in raptures and ended a winter of discontent. Spring's rifle shot from 25 yards stunned both sets of fans, who had already switched off and were waiting for the whistle to end the previous 81 minutes of dire football. After Spring's stunning strike both sides had clear chances but neither side failed to convert and the Addicks took the points. After the game Neil Warnock revealed that Jamie Scowcroft would be joining the Addicks before the close of the transfer window and Kelly Youga would be moving the other way to SE25.

    I wasn't that far off :0) Get in there!
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