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The Charlton Nativity

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  • [cite]Posted By: Solidgone[/cite]I'm not clued up on this shit either, I thought the Zulus surrounded Drifts Rourke and then Michael Cain escaped on Chitty Chitty Bang Bang via the Yellow Brick Road Highway to Noddy Land..........Not a lot of people know that!

    you been sampling ollies stash???
  • Robbo on the wing
    Robbo on the wing Posts: 4,135
    edited December 2006
    Just recieved a phone call from a pissed off Tony Adams.
  • suzisausage
    suzisausage Posts: 11,502
    carl tiler is more apt!
  • MCS
    MCS Posts: 8,404
    [cite]Posted By: Robbo on the wing[/cite]Just recieved a phone call from a pissed off Tony Adams.

    or do you mean a pissed up Tony Adams!
  • Solidgone
    Solidgone Posts: 10,205
    [cite]Posted By: carlingaddick[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Solidgone[/cite]I'm not clued up on this shit either, I thought the Zulus surrounded Drifts Rourke and then Michael Cain escaped on Chitty Chitty Bang Bang via the Yellow Brick Road Highway to Noddy Land..........Not a lot of people know that!

    you been sampling ollies stash???


    Just thought of a song for the donkeys - E's are good....E's are good. If you say it in a slurred drawled voice it could sound like a donkey.....honest (hic)..pour another sherry!
  • _MrDick
    _MrDick Posts: 13,103
    I want to be the taxi driver.
  • Medders
    Medders Posts: 5,572
    All Thaid Up is most definitely an ass
  • JWADDICK
    JWADDICK Posts: 846
    Enough talk, we need to get this show on the road before we lose the season. This is my stab at the first scene and cast ... over to the rest of you to continue it.

    Dramatis Personae

    Mary - SuzieSausage
    Gabriel - O4MCS
    Joseph - Tavern
    Innkeeper - Henry Irving
    Pilate - Curb it
    Three wise Men - LTGTR, Len Glover,Killersbeard
    Jesus - Oracle
    Bright Star - 1905
    Assorted Donkeys - HH, Luke Young,El K,Djimi Traore,Bryan Hughes.
    Sheep - Matt Holland, Radostan Kishishev, Dennis Rommedhal, Souleymayne Diawara
    Shepherds - AFKA,Lookie, Peakey's Rocket,Stanmore, Robbo,Mascot, Solid Gone

    Act One

    Scene 1

    fx (Blackout, Mary enters S.R hoovering, followspot tracks her progress)
    Suddenly Gabriel appears with pyroflash S.L

    Gabriel - Allright babe?

    Mary - Who the f***k are you ?

    Gabriel - The angel of the lord innit, and you are in for one hell of a night with me.

    Mary - What do you mean ? I'm off down the Venue in a minute, Bloodthirsty Shark Attack are gonna be there and me and my Bro love that band!

    Gabriel - Oh no you're not! I am here to impregnate you with God's seed, due to your clean living ways, dodgy musical tastes and charity mince pie making, the big man upstairs has chosen you to bear his only Son.

    Mary - JESUS CHRIST...

    Gabriel - That's the kiddy.

    Mary - Well I don't know what Joe's gonna say ..

    Gabriel - Don't worry about him, me and the Boss have arranged for him to be carpentering on lates tonight. Now brace yourself girl, these wings need a bit of room not to mention the rest of me.

    fx Blackout and Strobe (about 30 Seconds)

    Mary - Was that it then?

    Gabriel - Yup, job done darlin' us angels don't piss about, look sorry to shoot and run but I gotta fly.

    fax Gabriel exits S.R on a wire

    Mary - Bleedin' typical, 30 seconds of celestial thunder and now i've got to change this straw before the old man gets home.
    Scene 1
  • Nice one JW!!!!

    I'm not brave enough to carry on with this but hope others can!
  • 1905
    1905 Posts: 2,751
    Too good for me JW. I am looking forward to scene 2 from one our witty posters.........
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  • MCS
    MCS Posts: 8,404
    JW, thats quality man
  • Curb_It
    Curb_It Posts: 21,218
    who or what the hell is pilate? pontious pilate wasnt in the nativity was he?
  • 1905
    1905 Posts: 2,751
    pilate - Isnt it some sort of exercise that you bints enjoy.
  • Sco
    Sco Posts: 2,623
    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]who or what the hell is pilate? pontious pilate wasnt in the nativity was he?

    You can get them in Northern coffee shops - "I'll have have a pie-latte, matey."
  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,203
    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]who or what the hell is pilate? pontious pilate wasnt in the nativity was he?[/quote]


    No, it was King Herod who called the Census that meant mary and joe had to go home for the head count.

    JW brilliant other than that. I await the next installment.
  • JWADDICK
    JWADDICK Posts: 846
    Quite right Henry, from now on B shall be known as Herod.
  • Curb_It
    Curb_It Posts: 21,218
    lol!