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My missus said to me today ...

Off_it
Off_it Posts: 28,838
edited August 2009 in Fun, Jokes & Captions
... "Why do you always end up with the ump whenever we go out for the day?"

So I told her, "Because you are with me".

Comments

  • Leroy Ambrose
    Leroy Ambrose Posts: 14,435
    [cite]Posted By: Off_it[/cite]... "Why do you always end up with the ump whenever we go out for the day?"

    So I told her, "Because you are with me".
    Ahahahaha - that's gold. The other day my wife asked why I was snappy with her - I told her it was because she was being an 'unreasonable, irritating c***'. I'm guessing your quip got a marginally better reaction than mine...
  • Off_it
    Off_it Posts: 28,838
    She followed it up with, "why don't you leave me then?"

    To which I replied, "you've got the car keys and I don't drive"

    The really funny thing is, I'm not making this up!
  • _MrDick
    _MrDick Posts: 13,103
    [cite]Posted By: Off_it[/cite]She followed it up with, "why don't you leave me then?"

    To which I replied, "you've got the car keys and I don't drive"

    The really funny thing is, I'm not making this up!

    You wanna join the Tommy Cooper appreciation society. He used to tell jokes of that quality
  • jimmymelrose
    jimmymelrose Posts: 9,747
    [cite]Posted By: Off_it[/cite]She followed it up with, "why don't you leave me then?"

    To which I replied, "you've got the car keys and I don't drive"

    The really funny thing is, I'm not making this up!

    Do you mean that you're not making up the conversation or that you're not making up the reason for not leaving her?
  • Cuff
    Cuff Posts: 308
    So Worthing wasn't all you hoped it would be?
  • Mortimerician
    Mortimerician Posts: 5,222
    Get yourself into the Girl Trouble?! thread gents. There's a young man in there that needs the sage advice of you two silver tongued Lotharios