Care homes

JVL

Already a rather grim day on here with Carter's desperately sad news, but I wonder if anyone can help us.

My partner Marie's brother is 34, and had been in remission from MS for 10 years. In early summer, he started to go downhill really fast, straight into secondary progressive. As soon as he stopped earning, his wife divorced him, essentially for being ill, which probably accelerated matters further.

He's in Amersham general until his rate of deterioration slows enough, but he's gone from ambling around reasonably happily with a stick with me to the Oak and the Chequers, trying to find somewhere to watch the last Ashes test over a beer, to blind, incontinent and completely incoherent, in a relatively small number of weeks. Even his specialist MS doctors are stunned at the speed of it.

We want to get him down to a care home way closer to us, anywhere from SE London to mid-Kent. If anybody has any experiences of care homes with relatives or friends, positive or negative, it would be helpful to hear of them.

Thanks.

LenGlover

I cannot give a personal recommendation but friends have told me that Cheshire homes are very good

http://www.lcdisability.org/

BDL

Peter Gidney centre in Darenth. Specialist care for younger people.

Had lots of dealings with them on a professional basis and I'm happy to recommend them.

Good luck and whisper me if you need any advice re managing finances.

Dave

cafckev

In my work, Im always in and out of care homes. And being really really honest, I have not found one in SE London that I would be happy putting one of my relatives into. Having said that, it is down to personel choice. I know people who love a home, and I know people who hate the same home etc.

LargeAddick

an ex-neighbour ended up in one in Darenth and I know she was happy there and that her relatives were impressed but I don't know if it was the Peter Gidney Centre or not. Sorry and also sorry to learn of your brother in law's situation. Hope you get it sorted soon.

Henry Irving

Speak to BDL, he does know what he's talking about.

And sorry to hear about your in law Jon, terrible thing to happen.

JVL

Thanks a lot guys. Much appreciated.

RedZed333

You might want to start with social services, they can appoint a care manager to give you advice on finding a place to live, finances etc....

JVL

Still really in limbo until Nigel's condition levels out. We've seen a place in Bromley
that would be perfect for him, but can't really do much until his doctor/occ therapist
start talking in terms of discharge from hospital. Next case conf is Thursday, so I shall
Try and ask the sensible questions we spoke about then.

You gonna be Elland Road? It'd be nice to say hello!
J