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Stag night ideas & funny tales

jimmymelrosejimmymelrose
edited January 2007 in Other Football and Sports
It's my stag night tomorrow and my best man has already started doing his job of being silly by suggesting the wearing of yellow rubber gloves.

The said benefits are:

1. It'll help us grip our pint glasses better
2. We can take them off in the Indian restaurant afterwards and still have virus free hands without necessitating a trip to the loo.
3. It will be silly
4. A successful team is a group of many hands but of one idea. Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is success.
5. Diawara wears gloves and that's normally a laugh

What does everyone think?

Do you have any other similar tales of silly ideas on stag nights.
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Comments

  • KetmanKetman
    The Rugby One I went to (Only footballer amongst 14 huge rugby guys) you had to have one rubber glove, one swimming cap, four spoofing coins & be able to recite japanese from 1-10 on demand. You also had a Mr Men book & were required to read it to the rest of the group if requested (Mine was Mr Skinny). At any time asked you had to don swimming cap have the four spoofing coins in your rubber gloved hand the last one to do it was punished in a drinking sense. Love stags they rock, have a good one!
  • CharltonparklaneCharltonparklane
    edited January 2007
    When we went to Butlins for a lads weekend you had to hold you beer in your left and hand and if caught with a bear in your right hand you had to buy yourself a shot of any of the top shelf.

    Got very messy in the end and you wouldnt believe how hard it was.
  • suzisausagesuzisausage
    my friends do the left hand thing, also you're not allowed to be 'double parked' with only 2 drinks. if you go to the bar, you buy/carry at least 3, if you're caught with 2, you have to down yours. also if someone gets back from the bar with a drink for you and you haven't finished your previous one. you have to down it, as you cant be 'double parked'
  • suzisausagesuzisausage
    only if they can't stick to the rules!
  • Heath HeroHeath Hero
    [cite]Posted By: Charltonparklane[/cite]When we went to Butlins for a lads weekend you had to hold you beer in your left and hand and if caught with a bear in your right hand you had to buy yourself a shot of any of the top shelf.

    Got very messy in the end and you wouldnt believe how hard it was.

    They have bears in Butlins??!
  • CharltonparklaneCharltonparklane
    edited January 2007
    I edited that after about 10 secs!!!!!, oopss!! I had spelt it Bears twice and only changed it once, must slow down when typing!
  • _MrDick_MrDick
    I went to Benidorm for a week in the 1980's for a stag do with some Rugby players and all we were allowed to take was one clean pair of pants, one clean shirt and a tooth brush in a Sainsbury's carrier bag...Lovely

    The fella who services my alarm went off to Spain with his mates for a week and he did very well to keep his wits about him and not manage to get himself into too much trouble. When he got back, the best man had bricked up both his front and back doorway's. That's very funny.
  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    edited January 2007
    no good for this stag weekend... but best one i've ever heard, from a mate was on one where they got the stag absolutely wasted that he couldnt remember a thing - par for the course - but when they put him to bed and when he was alseep they pulled down his boxers and sprayed ralgex up his arris... the next morning the stag arrived to breakfast obviously with one very sore bottom and all the lads asked him who was the bloke that he had been chatting to at the nightclub all night and and where did he go with him once they left together? Cue one very scared stag.

    A friend told me this, i so hope its not one of these urban myths.
  • razilrazil
    go to Budapest, and the Halo bar.. nuff said.
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  • AFKABartramAFKABartram
    despite the legend, i've never once seen anyone tied naked to a tree or lampost.

    does that actually happen ?
  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    yes i saw a lad i know tied to the bollard area in the middle of the road in greenwich town centre. he had come out of up the creek and they took his clothes off and put a pousing pouch on him. i felt really sorry for him.
  • ShagShag
    My uncle did many years ago . He was in the Mitre near the Woolich ferry and got tied naked to the roundabout there .

    All the old dears coming out of Bingo had a field day
  • _MrDick_MrDick
    [cite]Posted By: AFKA Bartram[/cite]despite the legend, i've never once seen anyone tied naked to a tree or lampost.

    does that actually happen ?

    Yep. One of my school friends wanted a quiet meal for his 'stag do' which he had. He didnt bank on us handcuffing him to the tree outside and jumping in cabs back to his house to drink his beer. The owner of the restaurant called the fire brigade but they refused to come out. When his girlfriend came home from her hen night we gave her the key to the handcuffs and she went back to release him. Needless to say he wasn't very pleased and withdrew our invites to the wedding. LOL, those were the days.
  • StoneStone
    My mate had long standing problems with his neighbours. When we got him home, stripped him, we tied him to a chair and stuck him outside their door at 3.00am and knocked them up. Best things was, instead of getting the hump, they went and got a camera!
  • AFKABartramAFKABartram
    Not a stag do, but 9 of us went to Gran Canaria and one of the nine was still a student and only had about 200 quid for a fortnight. So we said we would set him various dares for certain amounts of drinks so that he could keep a pace.

    We were out one night and in the centre of the main square they had erected a big stage for a concert. For 8 beers he had to strip naked and run from one side of the stage to the other. So off came his gear, and off he went. When he got halfway across, the rest of us bolted in the other direction with his clothes, running into a big shopping centre. We were all hiding in different shops for about 15 mins with him frantically running from shop to shop trying to find various bits of his clothes.
  • KetmanKetman
    We Strip naked & handcuffed a mate of mine to a lampost in a midle of a main roundabout in Bournemouth on his stag, Literally 5 minutes after we left him there the heavens opened (We are talking monsoon conditions) after about 30 minutes people started to feel bad. Then about 15 minutes later in he walks in a coat with two girls who 'Rescued' him. How they got him out of the hand cuffs we'll never know.
  • 19051905
    Mate got chained naked to a lamp post outside the Rose in Dartford. Police pulled up and said they would drive round the block and expected everyone to be fully dressed and gone by time they came back ...........quite decent of them I thought.
  • AFKABartramAFKABartram
    the same bloke from Gran Canaria. when he was leaving to join Uni we did a pub crawl from the top of welling to the top of Bexleyheath.

    When we left the Kings Arms, we carried him to the fountain and was just about to strip him off when two coppers walked over and pulled me aside. They asked what we was up to, i explained my mate was going away, we wanted to chuck him in, but we're no bother really, and they said alright, just wait until they had walked past the corner. Mate was all cocky thinking he had got away with it, but soon got the full treatment !.
  • mascot88mascot88
    I was once member of a briliantly named club called 'Drink Club' where all of Suzis and Charltonparklanes rules were applied as i 'double parked' and had to drink with left hand... the other two rules were when you were finished with your drink you had to give it to someone else to put it down on the table or else you got a fresh one to down.... and you couldnt leave ot 'unattended' if you had to go to the loo you had to ask someone to look after your drink......


    VERY MESSY......
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  • 19051905
    Carter - Tell me you have just made that up!! They slammed a mars bar up his arse!!
  • CarterCarter
    I shit you not. It was about six or seven years ago.

    I don't know/can't remember if he took the whole thing or not. I can't imagine he did as the physics of that are all out I imagine.

    A couple of the rugby lot did look genuinely remorseful after but we didn't hang around for long after witnessing that.
  • mascot88mascot88
    Bloody hell!!!!

    That image has just ruined my afternoon......
  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    but didnt it melt while attempting to insert it? i have heard about chair legs etc from the rugger types.
  • ShagShag
    Those rugger types are a right laugh
  • CarterCarter
    I have been asked about the melting issue when I've told this story in the past.

    I can honestly say I don't know whether it melted or not.

    I told this once in my local and a barmaid pointed out that it should have been frozen. I didn't ask how or why she knew this.

    By the screams of the victim I don't think the whole thing melted however.
  • AFKABartramAFKABartram
    LOL, i can't stop laughing.

    my lot are too nice, none of us have stiched each other up on stag do's.
  • ShagShag
    It just does nt happen too much these days does it .

    Its more of an excuse to get away with the lads to go on the piss
  • MCSMCS
    I have seen similar, at a gentlemens evening at some football club (the one in new eltham that you have to drive through that petrol station to get to, next to is it homebase or b and q) well anyway one of the old sloshers asked for volenteer, and as it was only really late teens or early 20's some idiot said i will do it! Anyway she put him face down on the floor tied his hands and put a gimp mask on him, then pulled his slacks down, got a big giant saringe looked for some one with a pint, sucked up some beer and then proceeded to pump it into his anus, i was larughing so hard, i nearly fell over! In this same place, someone else got Pizzed on, jumped up straight away going eeerrrrrrr thats mingin, then some older (bout 50) got up and laid where the other birthday boy was laying and she pizzed on him instead! It was well funny!

    And i am sure Mr Mortain was in attendance to vouch!
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