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Worst/Funniest Song Lyrics

Tinie Tempah - Pass Out

''Ive been to Southampton but i've never been to Scunthorpe''

And thats UK No.1 at the moment ladies & gentleman. What a load of b*llocks.
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Comments

  • ABC - That was then, but this is now.

    "Can't complain, mustn't grumble,
    Help yourself to another piece of apple crumble"
  • Des'ree - Life

    ''I don't want to see a ghost,
    It's the sight that I fear most,
    I'd rather have a piece of toast,
    Watch the evening news.''
  • I wont be posting the lyrics here but the lyrics to "So what" regularly performed by Metallica is particularly bad/wrong/funny, depending on how many brain cells you have.
  • Ella ella ella eh eh ella ella ella under my umbrella... shocking...

    No no no no no no no no no no no there's no limits...
  • [cite]Posted By: adamtheaddick[/cite]No no no no no no no no no no no there's no limits...

    lol, no valley too deep, no mountain too high. Classic.
  • One of 90's pop group Bros alledged 'songs' went like this

    'most of my friends were strangers when I met them'

    No Sh1t!
  • [cite]Posted By: ValleyGary[/cite]Tinie Tempah - Pass Out

    ''Ive been to Southampton but i've never been to Scunthorpe''

    And thats UK No.1 at the moment ladies & gentleman. What a load of b*llocks.

    "I've got so many clothes I leave some at my aunties"


    Brilliant - magnificent lyricist that man
  • I was looking for a job then I found a job and heavens knows I'm miserable now...

    Plenty of mozza songs great lyrics.

    If a 10 ton truck smashes into us, to die by your side well the pleasure the pleasure is all mine.
  • [cite]Posted By: Swisdom[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: ValleyGary[/cite]Tinie Tempah - Pass Out

    ''Ive been to Southampton but i've never been to Scunthorpe''

    And thats UK No.1 at the moment ladies & gentleman. What a load of b*llocks.

    "I've got so many clothes I leave some at my aunties"


    Brilliant - magnificent lyricist that man

    It could possibly be the worst two verses in song writing history.

    ''Yeah, They say hello, they say ‘ola and they say bonjour,
    I’m pissed i never got to fly on a concord,
    I bin Southampton but ive never bin to Scunthorpe,
    I’m fucking crazy with the kicks, call me Jean Claude,

    About to be a bigger star than my mum thought,
    Cos every day i got a groupie at my front door,
    Now I drive past the bus i used to run for,
    Where’s my f*cking clap, where’s my encore?''
  • "Its 1 o'clock and time for lunch......dum de dum de dum. "

    I know what I like (in your wardrobe) - Genesis

    or


    "1 2 3 4 can I have a little more
    5 6 7 8 I love you"

    All together now - The Beatles.

    or

    "number 9, number 9, number 9, number 9, number 9, number 9, number 9..........."

    Revolution 9 - The Beatles.
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  • edited March 2010
    Kate Nash - Birds

    "She was waitin` at the station
    he was gettin` off the train
    he didn't have a ticket so he had to run through the barriors, again.

    well the ticket inspector saw him rushin` through he said, girl you don't know how much i've missed you
    but
    we better run
    cause i havent got the funds to pay
    this
    fine
    she said
    fine"

    "well she was wearin a skirt
    and he thought she looked nice and
    yeah she didn't really care about
    anything else because she only
    wanted him to think that she looked nice
    and he did"
  • Oasis - Supersonic

    You need to be yourself
    You can't be no one else
    I know a girl called Elsa
    She's into Alka Seltzer
    She sniffs it through a cane on a supersonic train
    She made me laugh
    I got her autograph
    She done it with a doctor on a helicopter
    She's sniffin in her tissue
    Sellin' the Big Issue


    What a bunch of bellends.

    Noel Gallagher a good song writer? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
  • Most of Lily Allens.

    Just sings conversations with herself
  • "And I keep bleeding, I keep keep bleeding, keep bleeding" Leona lewis...

    Should get down superdrug and get herself some tampax if you ask me...
  • Lucky that my lips not only mumble
    They spill kisses like a fountain
    Lucky that my breasts are small and humble
    So you don't confuse them with mountains


    Shakira. When ever, where ever.
  • [cite]Posted By: P_Air[/cite]Oasis - Supersonic

    You need to be yourself
    You can't be no one else
    I know a girl called Elsa
    She's into Alka Seltzer
    She sniffs it through a cane on a supersonic train
    She made me laugh
    I got her autograph
    She done it with a doctor on a helicopter
    She's sniffin in her tissue
    Sellin' the Big Issue


    What a bunch of bellends.

    Noel Gallagher a good song writer? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!

    And after all you're my wonderwall! - You're my what?
  • Long Haired Lover from Liverpool.................Yuck!
  • 'My Ding-a-Ling'. What a song for Chuck to have as his only no.1.
  • Leader of the Laundromat by the Detergents (classic 1960's parody of the Shangri-Las Leader of the Pack.

    My folks were always putting her down (down, down)
    Because her laundry came back brown (brown, brown)
    I don't care if they think she's bad
    I fell in love cuz she looked so sad
    I got a date tonight with the Leader of the Laundromat.
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  • [cite]Posted By: bibble[/cite]One of 90's pop group Bros alledged 'songs' went like this

    'most of my friends were strangers when I met them'

    No Sh1t!

    I love the idea that they probably imagined this to be extremely profound when they wrote it.
  • Lorraine - Bad Manners

    So bad it's funny.

    "Lorraine punched me on the nose, so I slapped her round the head,
    Then we talked the whole thing out, and went straight to bed,
    (Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha)

    But now I've found her, don't want to kill her,
    But now I've found her, don't want to kill her,
    But now I've found her, don't want to kill her,
    But now I've found her, don't want to kill her,

    Lorraine, Lorraine, Lorraine, Lorraine, Lorraine,
    Lorraine, Lorraine, Lorraine, Lorraine."
  • [cite]Posted By: P_Air[/cite]Oasis - Supersonic

    You need to be yourself
    You can't be no one else
    I know a girl called Elsa
    She's into Alka Seltzer
    She sniffs it through a cane on a supersonic train
    She made me laugh
    I got her autograph
    She done it with a doctor on a helicopter
    She's sniffin in her tissue
    Sellin' the Big Issue


    What a bunch of bellends.

    Noel Gallagher a good song writer? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!

    jog on
  • Feel like asking a tree for an autograph
    And I feel like making love to a photograph
    Photographs don't smell

    Give it to the Soft Boys - Soft Boys
  • 99.9% of blondies rapping in ''rapture''. great tune but she should never have stuck that rapping on the end.
  • 26 comments and no one's mentioned the Black Eyed Peas


    [cite]Posted By: Where Is The Love[/cite]Overseas, yeah, we try to stop terrorism
    But we still got terrorists here livin'
    In the USA, the big CIA
    The Bloods and The Crips and the KKK
    But if you only have love for your own race
    Then you only leave space to discriminate
    And to discriminate only generates hate
    And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah
    Madness is what you demonstrate
    And that's exactly how anger works and operates


    [cite]Posted By: My Humps[/cite]What you gon' do with all that junk?
    All that junk inside your trunk?
    I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
    Get you love drunk off my hump.
    My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
    My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps (Check it out)


    [cite]Posted By: I Gotta Feeling[/cite]Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday
    (Do it!)
    Friday, Saturday, Saturday to Sunday
    (Do it!)
    Get, get, get, get, get with us, you know what we say, say
    Party every day, p-p-p-party every day


    [cite]Posted By: Let's Get Retarded[/cite]In this context, there's no disrespect, so, when I bust my rhyme, you break your necks.
    We got five minutes for us to disconnect, from all intellect collect the rhythm effect.
    Obstacles are inefficient, follow your intuition, free your inner soul and break away from tradition.


    [cite]Posted By: Don't Phunk With My Heart[/cite]Girl, you know you got me, got me
    With your pistol shot me, shot me
    And I'm here helplessly
    In love and nothing can stop me
    You can't stop me cause once I start it
    Can't return me cause once you bought it


    [cite]Posted By: Don't Lie[/cite]Hey, baby my nose is getting big
    I noticed it be growing when I been telling them fibs
    Now you say your trust's getting weaker
    Probably coz my lies just started getting deeper
    And the reason for my confession is that I learn my lesson
    And I really think you ought to know the truth
    Because I lied and I cheated and I lied a little more
    But after I did it I don't know what I did it for
    I admit that I have been a little immature
    Fucking with your heart like I was the predator
    In my book of lies I was the editor
    And the author
    I forged my signature


    [cite]Posted By: Boom Boom Pow[/cite]I like that boom boom pow
    Them chicken jackin' my style
    They try copy my swagger
    I'm on that next shit now
    I'm so three thousand and eight
    You so two thousand and late

    I'm on the supersonic boom
    Y'all hear the space shit zoom
    When when I step inside the room them girls go apeshit, uh

    I'm a beast when you turn me on
    Into the future cybertron
    Harder, faster, better, stronger
    Sexy ladies extra longer

    Here we go, here we go
    Satellite radio
    Y'all getting hit with (Boom boom)
    Beats so big I'm steppin on leprechauns
    Shitin' on y'all you with the (Boom boom)

    Special mention for
    [cite]Posted By: Fergie[/cite]How come every time you come around
    My London London Bridge want to go down
    Like London London London wanna go down
    Like London London London
  • Worst, funniest or just needing an airing.....

    Home improvement expert Harold Hill of Harold Hill
    Of Do-It-Yourself dexterity, and double glazing skill
    Came home to find another gentleman's kippers in the grill
    So he sanded off his winkle with his Black and Decker drill
  • you think some of them are terrible? i used to listen to sh*te like this when i was a teen. Birthday by Sugarcubes

    'she lives in this house over there, has her world outside it.
    grapples with the earth with her fingers and her mouth--she's five years old.
    thread worms on a string, keeps spiders in her pocket, collects fly-wings in
    a jar scrubs horse flies and pinches them on a line.

    she's got one friend he lives next door, they listen to the weather, he knows how many freckles she's got, she
    scratches his beard. she's painting huge books, glues them together,
    they saw a big raven; it glided down the sky--she touched it.

    today's a birthday-they're sucking cigars, he got a chain of flowers, sows a bird in her
    knickers, they're sucking cigars, lie in the bathtub, chain of flowers.'

    total nuts!!!
  • If you were a horse, Id clean the crap out of your stable and never once complain - divine comedy
  • Pavement lyrics are always a bit out there.

    Tangled in the midst of all the trust
    the way you pissed inside
    the brain file technology drives.
    Show me you dots now.
    Who was it that said the world
    was mainly all divorces and spare change?
    Let's lethalize our slingshots and swallow propane.

    Senior year abroad i ripped the pea out of the pod.
    In store for three months of exile in spain.
    Where was the danger?
    Watch out for the gypsy children in electric dresses
    they're insane.
    I hear they live in crematoriums
    and smoke your remains.
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Roland Out Forever!