[cite]Posted By: Mister Windscreen[/cite]Even poor old Josh is doubting his initial wisdom of ever applying to be part of this trashfest.
Josh Dubovie Official Number 269 on iTunes with 'That Sounds Good To Me'. At the moment that does not sound good to me, hehe!!
His own words...poor sod.
9/4 to finish last!
If our song is rubbish, we're in the final by default, and the rest of Europe hates us thats got to be good odds surely?
PeteF - your thoughts please?
Chris, 9/4 is tempting, but I dont think we will finish bottom, there is some serious cack out there! despite us being hated, with regard to us being in the final, its because we pay the most to put the contest on, without us and a few others there would be no song contest. Not sure how the new voting system will work and if it will stop the Eastern Block voting shenanigans.
UK to finish last is a good bet, at 9/4 odds even more so. Spain and Norway have songs that Eurovision likes, and Germany are one of the favourites. France is a tough one to call - much better than the UK song, but it's RnB, so who knows how it'll play.
Belgium is still my tip for an each way bet. Serbia and Turkey the other two to watch.
Ok Lewis, I guarantee you will be wasted by the end!
In this drinking game, there are three sizes of drink; in ascending order: sip, slurp and chug. Please scale these to the drink you're having. For beer, they would be about a swig, a full mouthful, and three gulps respectively. For spirits, they would be about a quarter, a half and a whole shot glass respectively. Have fun, but know your limits! the game Unless stated otherwise, all events listed below deserve one sip. Presenters
There are always two presenters on screen, a Host and a Hostess. Each broadcaster usually provides an additional Commentator to provide voice-over translations, background information and witty sarcasm. The Commentator makes a satirical comment that no-one laughs at The Host and Hostess try and fail to be funny The Host and Hostess sing The Host and Hostess speak in rhyme The Host and Hostess gaze into each others eyes The Host and Hostess kiss: chug The Hostess changes her dress The Host changes his outfit: slurp Presenters having a time-wasting conversation that no-one can follow, understand or care less about Performances — general points
Song has a tacky or nonsensical title (shoo-wop etc.) Politically-related metaphor (e.g. breaking out of chains, shedding a black cloak to reveal white clothes) Lyrics are literally demonstrated in the performance Act steals ideas from Eurovision acts from previous years Use of props (e.g. candles, ribbons, dummies, mobile phones) Use of pyrotechnics or lasers; if they go wrong: chug Interaction with the audience; if the audience is unusually passive: slurp Any time the song goes up a key France conducts a musical experiment France sings in English: chug A country from Former Yugoslavia has a depressing song Germany's song mentions peace, harmony or love (one sip each) A country borrows any performer from another country if the borrowed performer is Irish: slurp if the country doing the borrowing is Ireland: chug For future reference (see Judging below), make a note of any: predictions that the Commentator makes about the song acts where the attractiveness of the performer(s) is the only thing going for it Appearance of performers
Retro/out-of-date clothing and hairstyles Bad dress-sense; if utterly offensive: slurp Experimental make-up Indecently revealing or figure-hugging costumes: slurp Overt displays of cleavage Codpiece(s): chug Faked blond hair (East European countries only) Hat(s); if horned: chug Sunglasses Moustache(s); if female with moustache: chug Main singer is grossly overweight Malta: male singer does not have a hairy chest: slurp Mid-performance costume change Singers and back-up vocalists
Sing in a language other than their native tongue, English or French Perform through the medium of rap: slurp Wink at camera Drop to their knees Flick their hair; if they flick non-existent hair: chug Make a victory/peace ‘V’ sign Wave their arms above their heads whilst singing Punch the air Put excessive emotion into their singing Sing out of tune Emit high and loud obnoxious noises Play or mime along with musicians during instrumentals; if they play badly: slurp Resemble someone you know Resemble another famous person if that person is present in the audience: slurp if the camera zooms in and lingers on that person: chug Flirt with the camera after finishing Dancers and musicians
Play an ‘ethnic’ instrument (includes panpipes) Play piano while standing ‘Ethnic’ dancing Hip-hop style dancing: slurp Dancing that detracts from the performance Dancing that surpasses belief and credibility Pretend fighting: if martial arts, chug Contortionist: chug Television coverage and venue
Transmission goes a bit wonky Preview video is completely pointless Preview video is full of gormless smiles National symbols are seen somewhere Helicopter shots Sped up or slowed down film Prolonged video mixes Colour replacement effects Any special effect better than the songs Judging
Bad time delays during video/audio link Host/Hostess overlap with voter during video/audio link because of the bad delay Host/Hostess have to hurry a voter for wasting time with pointless wittering The Commentator's predictions come true (one sip each) The Commentator is genuinely surprised by a decision Bad acts receive high (8+) points due to attractiveness of lead singer The Commentator makes a snide comment about regional voting (see below for the usual offenders). Bonus sips for any of the following phrases: block voting mutual voting society still getting used to democracy vote for your neighbour contest There's a discussion why Israel is involved Reference made to Norway having null points Norway gives points to Sweden but Sweden does not give any to Norway Norway does not give Sweden any points at all: chug Cyprus gives Greece 12 points or vice versa France does not give United Kingdom any points Monaco gives France 12 points Germany gives any points at all to Austria: chug Greece gives any points at all to Turkey: chug United Kingdom gives Ireland 12 points or vice versa United Kingdom comes second or last Ireland win yet again Acts are on their mobile phone to their family during voting If the winning country declines to hold the event for any or all of the following: chug Financial reasons Political reasons Personal reasons Moral reasons Optional extras
Begin each act with a shot of a drink native to that country Choose a country to support and if it receives 1 to 7 points on any given vote: sip if it receives 8, 10 or 12 points: slurp if it wins: chug throughout the reprise
[cite]Posted By: PeteF[/cite]The new voting system has clearly failed! I blame the Russians, nice to see a rather plump Mrs Doyle into the final for Ireland.
Cheers for that PETE F i will have to have a drink after reading the rules. will give it ago if i get near a TV on saturday night.Will let you know how i get on.Then again i could be preoccupied with my own eurovision dutch girl this saturday.
[cite]Posted By: PeteF[/cite]The new voting system has clearly failed! I blame the Russians, nice to see a rather plump Mrs Doyle into the final for Ireland.
Well at least the youtube video of the UK entry will go down in history.....as having the most offensive comments deleted of any video...lets pull out now!
[cite]Posted By: windscreen[/cite]...lets pull out now!
Why should we pull out? Because Pete Waterman and Mike Stock didn't want your version? Sorry but you really do have delusions of grandeur if you think those guys (multi million selling producers and writers) will take advice from you. It's like me telling Chris Evans Danny Baker how he should present a radio show.
The song by Daz a few years ago was worse than this. Compared to some of the other stuff our entry isn't that bad. It wont win, it may come last as we're not very popular in europe.
I really don't understand some people.
(edited to the best Broadcaster on British Radio even if he dos support them !)
Just watched Justin Lee Collins on Fiver. He tried to represent Ireland. Had a great song written by the pub singer (Ronan Keating) but didn't make it through to their national final. It really is a great pop song and deserved to be heard. Ronan Keating told him that he knew Irish judges had already decided who their entry would be, he was right!
[cite]Posted By: BDL[/cite]Ronan Keating told him that he knew Irish judges had already decided who their entry would be, he was right!
Songwriter believes his song is the best and was cheated out of winning songwriting competition. Stop the press!
People looking for a bet, my tip is a double: Belgium to finish in the top 4 and UK to finish last. It's really got that quality all rubbish commercial British songs have of getting in your head and making you angrier. Like Cheryl Cole's first song. Grrrrr. Only possibility is that the French song will flop, but I think it's much much better than that Josh bloke. That's got to count for something, right?
By the way, that's my tip, not my favourite or least favourite. I think the Russian song is awful, and my favourite is Armenia. They're dancing around a massive apricot stone, what's not to like?
[cite]Posted By: Mister Windscreen[/cite]Blimey BDL...you shouldnt really get that angry over a fun post. And I'm guessing you dont think my songs are as good as Stock Aitken & Watermans?
They may not be up with stuff written by the likes of messrs Lennon and McCartney, but they know how to write a pop song. So, sorry, no I don't think yours are as good as SAW
You might have heard some of my pop songs but how would you know I wrote them...'cos my name certainly isnt on any of the credits...so name them! If you can't, your last comment is gonna look pretty dumb!
Comments
9/4 to finish last!
If our song is rubbish, we're in the final by default, and the rest of Europe hates us thats got to be good odds surely?
PeteF - your thoughts please?
Still amazed that the Russian song got through on Tuesday even though it's worse than ours - Honest.
Not sure how the new voting system will work and if it will stop the Eastern Block voting shenanigans.
Belgium is still my tip for an each way bet. Serbia and Turkey the other two to watch.
Why did anyone think they would win - was their song any good? (not very likely for the ESC, I admit).
In this drinking game, there are three sizes of drink; in ascending order: sip, slurp and chug. Please scale these to the drink you're having. For beer, they would be about a swig, a full mouthful, and three gulps respectively. For spirits, they would be about a quarter, a half and a whole shot glass respectively.
Have fun, but know your limits!
the game
Unless stated otherwise, all events listed below deserve one sip.
Presenters
There are always two presenters on screen, a Host and a Hostess. Each broadcaster usually provides an additional Commentator to provide voice-over translations, background information and witty sarcasm.
The Commentator makes a satirical comment that no-one laughs at
The Host and Hostess try and fail to be funny
The Host and Hostess sing
The Host and Hostess speak in rhyme
The Host and Hostess gaze into each others eyes
The Host and Hostess kiss: chug
The Hostess changes her dress
The Host changes his outfit: slurp
Presenters having a time-wasting conversation that no-one can follow, understand or care less about
Performances — general points
Song has a tacky or nonsensical title (shoo-wop etc.)
Politically-related metaphor (e.g. breaking out of chains, shedding a black cloak to reveal white clothes)
Lyrics are literally demonstrated in the performance
Act steals ideas from Eurovision acts from previous years
Use of props (e.g. candles, ribbons, dummies, mobile phones)
Use of pyrotechnics or lasers; if they go wrong: chug
Interaction with the audience; if the audience is unusually passive: slurp
Any time the song goes up a key
France conducts a musical experiment
France sings in English: chug
A country from Former Yugoslavia has a depressing song
Germany's song mentions peace, harmony or love (one sip each)
A country borrows any performer from another country
if the borrowed performer is Irish: slurp
if the country doing the borrowing is Ireland: chug
For future reference (see Judging below), make a note of any:
predictions that the Commentator makes about the song
acts where the attractiveness of the performer(s) is the only thing going for it
Appearance of performers
Retro/out-of-date clothing and hairstyles
Bad dress-sense; if utterly offensive: slurp
Experimental make-up
Indecently revealing or figure-hugging costumes: slurp
Overt displays of cleavage
Codpiece(s): chug
Faked blond hair (East European countries only)
Hat(s); if horned: chug
Sunglasses
Moustache(s); if female with moustache: chug
Main singer is grossly overweight
Malta: male singer does not have a hairy chest: slurp
Mid-performance costume change
Singers and back-up vocalists
Sing in a language other than their native tongue, English or French
Perform through the medium of rap: slurp
Wink at camera
Drop to their knees
Flick their hair; if they flick non-existent hair: chug
Make a victory/peace ‘V’ sign
Wave their arms above their heads whilst singing
Punch the air
Put excessive emotion into their singing
Sing out of tune
Emit high and loud obnoxious noises
Play or mime along with musicians during instrumentals; if they play badly: slurp
Resemble someone you know
Resemble another famous person
if that person is present in the audience: slurp
if the camera zooms in and lingers on that person: chug
Flirt with the camera after finishing
Dancers and musicians
Play an ‘ethnic’ instrument (includes panpipes)
Play piano while standing
‘Ethnic’ dancing
Hip-hop style dancing: slurp
Dancing that detracts from the performance
Dancing that surpasses belief and credibility
Pretend fighting: if martial arts, chug
Contortionist: chug
Television coverage and venue
Transmission goes a bit wonky
Preview video is completely pointless
Preview video is full of gormless smiles
National symbols are seen somewhere
Helicopter shots
Sped up or slowed down film
Prolonged video mixes
Colour replacement effects
Any special effect better than the songs
Judging
Bad time delays during video/audio link
Host/Hostess overlap with voter during video/audio link because of the bad delay
Host/Hostess have to hurry a voter for wasting time with pointless wittering
The Commentator's predictions come true (one sip each)
The Commentator is genuinely surprised by a decision
Bad acts receive high (8+) points due to attractiveness of lead singer
The Commentator makes a snide comment about regional voting (see below for the usual offenders). Bonus sips for any of the following phrases:
block voting
mutual voting society
still getting used to democracy
vote for your neighbour contest
There's a discussion why Israel is involved
Reference made to Norway having null points
Norway gives points to Sweden but Sweden does not give any to Norway
Norway does not give Sweden any points at all: chug
Cyprus gives Greece 12 points or vice versa
France does not give United Kingdom any points
Monaco gives France 12 points
Germany gives any points at all to Austria: chug
Greece gives any points at all to Turkey: chug
United Kingdom gives Ireland 12 points or vice versa
United Kingdom comes second or last
Ireland win yet again
Acts are on their mobile phone to their family during voting
If the winning country declines to hold the event for any or all of the following: chug
Financial reasons
Political reasons
Personal reasons
Moral reasons
Optional extras
Begin each act with a shot of a drink native to that country
Choose a country to support and
if it receives 1 to 7 points on any given vote: sip
if it receives 8, 10 or 12 points: slurp
if it wins: chug throughout the reprise
Romania.
Go on.
will give it ago if i get near a TV on saturday night.Will let you know how i get on.Then again i could be preoccupied with my own eurovision dutch girl this saturday.
It's got cocaine in it.
Why should we pull out? Because Pete Waterman and Mike Stock didn't want your version? Sorry but you really do have delusions of grandeur if you think those guys (multi million selling producers and writers) will take advice from you. It's like me telling Chris Evans Danny Baker how he should present a radio show.
The song by Daz a few years ago was worse than this. Compared to some of the other stuff our entry isn't that bad. It wont win, it may come last as we're not very popular in europe.
I really don't understand some people.
(edited to the best Broadcaster on British Radio even if he dos support them !)
Will give it a go tomorrow night sounds a good game to me :-)
and Croatia's entry is sung by Feminnem, a female Eminen ??
Just watched Justin Lee Collins on Fiver. He tried to represent Ireland. Had a great song written by the pub singer (Ronan Keating) but didn't make it through to their national final. It really is a great pop song and deserved to be heard. Ronan Keating told him that he knew Irish judges had already decided who their entry would be, he was right!
I wished someone would.
You'll have Barts jumping on us for going off topic!
Songwriter believes his song is the best and was cheated out of winning songwriting competition. Stop the press!
People looking for a bet, my tip is a double: Belgium to finish in the top 4 and UK to finish last. It's really got that quality all rubbish commercial British songs have of getting in your head and making you angrier. Like Cheryl Cole's first song. Grrrrr. Only possibility is that the French song will flop, but I think it's much much better than that Josh bloke. That's got to count for something, right?
By the way, that's my tip, not my favourite or least favourite. I think the Russian song is awful, and my favourite is Armenia. They're dancing around a massive apricot stone, what's not to like?
They may not be up with stuff written by the likes of messrs Lennon and McCartney, but they know how to write a pop song. So, sorry, no I don't think yours are as good as SAW