I just got in from work and my wife gave me a big wet kiss on the lips...
I said 'Upstairs...'
She said 'Ooooh, you sexy beast, are you going to ravish me...?'
I said 'No, World Cup football's on the telly, now fcuk off upstairs...'
Women, they just don't understand, do they..!!
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As Algarve said yesterday, She knows where the bus-stop is........
I say what have you put in it...?
She says two cups of coffee and a choc ice...
Thick or what...?
Marriage is a give a take relationship..... 'I give and the wife takes' always worked for me!
My wife bought me one of those 'mood rings' to detect my moods...
When I'm happy it turns green and when I'm in a bad mood it leaves a fcuking big red mark on her forehead...
So I hit her with my XBox...
Theres a lot of sickipedia & text jokes going down here . . .
Me: 'Serbia and Ghana...'
Wife: 'Which one's Serbia...?'
Me: Disbelieving stare...