Joke of the day

northstandsteve

Prostitute says to a punter, would you like to have sex for £10 , the only trouble is I haven't got a womb. Punter says where will we do it then ?
Across the woad against the wailings she replies.

I thank you very much.

masicat

My wife asked me to get her something for Christmas that makes her look sexy. You should have seen her face when I gave her 12 pints of Stella. !!

WhenIwasLittleBoy

I couldn’t find my car scraper this morning so I used my B&Q card, I only got 10% off

ValleyGary

I had a spider on my keyboard.

I have it under Ctrl.

SE10Addick

its a youtube video, but still made me laugh

Yes, it is wrong to laugh

ShootersHillGuru

I need your advice. I have been offered 8 legs of venison for £40:00 - is that too dear ?

masicat

When my wife found out I had swapped our bed for a trampoline she hit the ceiling !!

nth_london_addick

Russia Eh Who'd have thought it.

If only we knew FIFA were looking for an Artic Wasteland
with a useless transport system and institutionalised Racism for the world cup
We couldve put a joint bid in with Scotland

Granpa

My mate is a Decorator and he and his wife finish up on the Bedroom carpet every night because she prefers a matt finish !

Essex_Al

2 condoms walk into a gay bar. One says to the other 'I fancy getting shit faced tonight'

PL54

Eh Granpa ?

cedric winkleburger

My wife has been missing for a week. The police called this morning and told me to expect the worst. So I had to go to the charity shop and ask for her clothes back.