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Todays April Fools Days articles

MrOneLungMrOneLung
edited April 2011 in Not Sports Related
What spoof articles have you seen in the papers.

A cursory look at the sports pages shows:

The Sun - Alex Ferguson to become life president of Referees Association.
Written by Doug Outban

Metro - Olympic tickets will have scratch and sniff relating to the sport it is issued for.
Cycling - tyre rubber
Football - mown Grass
Swimming - chlorine etc etc

any others
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Comments

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    stackitstevestackitsteve
    I was told about a good one in the mail today....

    Fulham Moonwalk
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    eaststandmikeeaststandmike
    Chris Powell has stated on the OS that "our season starts here" and aims to finish the last 8 games on a high.
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    CHGCHG
    Metro banging on about an edible paper.
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    NorthStandUltraNorthStandUltra
    I think the Telegraph are saying that to ease the problems in the Portugese economy, Portugal have sold Cristano Ronaldo to Spain for €160 million - meaning that from today, Ronaldo will represent Spain in International Football!
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    DizzleDizzle
    One on the mail online about a travelator being installed on golf courses so you can go around on a converyor belt from hole to hole
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    DaveStorryDaveStorry
    Mirror has article about the Govt taxing air
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    Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    OS has a story about Charlton merging with Celtic
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    stackitstevestackitsteve
    [cite]Posted By: Dizzle[/cite]One on the mail online about a travelator being installed on golf courses so you can go around on a converyor belt from hole to hole

    That was actually in the metro on wednesday so think its real, unless metro cocked up
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    ValiantphilValiantphil
    Yahoo says the Royal wedding could be hit by snow, according to long range weather predictions.
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    fadgadgetfadgadget
    Jessops the camera people , a new camera that lets you smell your pictures .
    http://mirror.newsletter.jessops.com/nl/jsp/m.jsp?c=256ceda0b8dcc5a394
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    sam3110sam3110
    edited April 2011
    Richard Branson has bought Pluto and has taken steps to re-instate it as a planet.........

    Pluto
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    Alex WrightAlex Wright
    [cite]Posted By: DaveStorry[/cite]Mirror has article about the Govt taxing air
    This is probably a real story :)
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    RothkoRothko
    April fools day, the day we remember why journalist are journalist and not comedy writers
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    DJ LeaburnDJ Leaburn
    Earthquake in Blackpool - The Guardian

    3D Radio - Radio 4
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    BedsaddickBedsaddick
    Rob Brydon was brilliant on Radio 2 this morning pretending to Ken Bruce for the entire show - very funny
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    VincenzoVincenzo
    The Independent said that Portugal were selling Ronaldo to Spain to ease the national debt.
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    dickplumbdickplumb
    [cite]Posted By: eaststandmike[/cite]Chris Powell has stated on the OS that "our season starts here" and aims to finish the last 8 games on a high.

    That one is just not believable, he really must try harder.
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    WSSWSS
    I don't think the earthquake one in blackpool was an April fool was it?
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    EastStandEastStand
    [cite]Posted By: dickplumb[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: eaststandmike[/cite]Chris Powell has stated on the OS that "our season starts here" and aims to finish the last 8 games on a high.

    That one is just not believable, he really must try harder.

    This is the only one that made me laugh.
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    NathanPriorNathanPrior
    Telford sign Albanian kit deal
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    PlaaayerPlaaayer
    If the earthquake was an April Fools it's taken in the whole of the media!
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    sam3110sam3110
    [cite]Posted By: NathanPrior[/cite]Telford sign Albanian kit deal

    FC Dogsarse LOL
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    Mendonca In AsdasMendonca In Asdas
    Someone said Dowie to Bury?
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    Bournemouth AddickBournemouth Addick
    [cite]Posted By: Bedsaddick[/cite]Rob Brydon was brilliant on Radio 2 this morning pretending to Ken Bruce for the entire show - very funny

    Heard some of that. Very good and made even better by the occassional slip up with his impressions into Wogan and references to how good Gavin & Stacey was.
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    DRFDRF
    The UN’s Intellectual Property Tribunal today ruled that South American Indians should receive 1% of the profits from potato sales worldwide, ‘in recognition of the fact that potatoes as we know them are effectively an indigenous creation’.

    The head of the tribunal, Dr. Desiree Dauphinoise, said that tribal peoples in Peru were the first cultivators of potatoes between 3000 and 2000 BC,  and ‘as creators of the world’s fourth-largest food crop, we believe it is only right that the debt the world owes indigenous people is finally acknowledged. 
     
    ‘What this decision really boils down to is giving credit to tribal peoples for their contribution to our everyday diets. We are going to keep our eyes peeled for other foods cultivated by tribal peoples that have not yet been recognized.’

    The South American Native Tribes Executive (Sante), who had brought the case before the tribunal, celebrated a ‘major victory’. Sante’s President, Jorge Papas, said, ‘This is a great victory for Sante and tribal people around the world. With the royalties we get from the potatoes, we will be able to buy back some of the lands that ranchers, loggers, and oil companies have taken from us.’ 
     
    With predicted annual revenue of $200 million, Sante will be able to purchase much of the lands that are currently occupied by businesses operating in and around the Amazon.

    This has led to fears that major oil companies like Repsol YPF and ranching company Yaguarete Pora will themselves be threatened. However, part of the royalties will be set aside to produce a potato growing manual, as well as a recipe book, to help businessmen in the Amazon become self-sufficient.

    Survival International’s Director, Stephen Corry, said today, ‘We are very pleased with the decision of  Dr. Dauphinoise to give due credit to tribal peoples for a food so many people rely on. We also want to reassure everyone that companies operating in the Amazon will not be left behind. While they may no longer be able to rely on the destruction of the rainforest for their livelihood, they will be able to grow potatoes.’
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    AlgarveaddickAlgarveaddick
    Wikipedia's front page is good:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page
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    SpankieSpankie
    edited April 2011
    [quote][cite]Posted By: DJ Leaburn[/cite]Earthquake in Blackpool - The Guardian

    The Earthquake story is real!!!

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-12930915
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    MortimericianMortimerician
    [quote][cite]Posted By: Rothko[/cite]April fools day, the day we remember why journalist are journalist and not comedy writers[/quote]
    Spot on. Used to be a nice idea when it was rare (like the spagetti trees) now it's just people titting around in a largely unfunny manner.
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    JTJT
    That's what I like about today. You scan through the news but there is always an element of doubt in your mind whether the story is true or not.

    Then you just have the Sun who come out with a story about a boy who was attacked by a marshmellow.
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    DRFDRF
    Scratching Fanny of Cock Lane is actually a 'true' story, in as much as it wasn't made up by Wiki for today.

    You can walk the relevant parts:
    http://www.walksoflondon.co.uk/35/true-ghost-stories-the-co.shtml
    http://everything2.com/title/Scratching+Fanny+of+Cock+Lane
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