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A Pole, a pond and some bottles of plonk.

edited December 2011 in Not Sports Related

As it's so quiet on here tonight, here's a little story. Once upon a time, well, a couple of days ago, there was a Polish delivery driver who delivered parcels to people in a big white van.  He got to one house near Reigate quite late in the evening and it was dark and raining. He was delivering a box of wine bottles to the lady that lived there. He got the heavy box from the back of the van and went through the gate. The front path was quite bendy but there were lights up each side to show the way in the dark. No-one quite knows what happened next but it seems that because of the box in front of him, the driver lost his bearings , went across the lawn and fell head first into the lady's pond. He picked himself up, found the box, and finally made it to the lady's front door. As he spoke no English and was soaking wet he decided not to ring the bell and he retired squelchily to his van.

When the lady opened her front door the next morning she found a large, soaking wet cardboard box on the doorstep  with wine bottles falling out of it. Looking down the garden she saw that the small fence and the netting around and over the pond that she had just paid £250 on had been demolished and there were large bootmarks through the flower beds. Father Christmas arrived early she wondered. Later that morning the driver returned with a colleague, a fellow Pole, who  could manage a few words of English. It was somehow explained to the lady that they thought the driver had dropped his hand-held computer in the pond and could they look for it please? They then spent 15 minutes sloshing about in the water but without success. The driver then asked her to sign a grubby bit of paper to confirm receipt of the wine but she refused to do this until she had spoken to his manager about the damage. He then apologised in Polish (via his chum) and he looked so wobegone, and wet, she took pity and signed his bit of paper for him. A neighbur (guess who) later fished the computer out of the water and the company have agreed to pay for the damage, so they all lived happily ever after.

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