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Traffic lights

or more appropriately f ing traffic lights!

I don't know about you but it doesn't matter what direction I'm travelling in. north,south,east or west. what type of road I'm on a or b, what time of day, morning, noon, night or early hours of the morning. I can guarantee they'll always be f ing red!

even the pedestrian lights, the other night at 1.30am, bleeding, red. who needs pedestrian lights at that time of the morn, no one was crossing.

you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!
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Comments


  • Rant over?


    ;o)
  • I find that when I'm in a rush, the lights are miraculously always red. Does my bloody heas in! Especially if I'm running late for a night shift. The roads should be dead at 10 o'clock in the evening!
  • or more appropriately f ing traffic lights!

    I don't know about you but it doesn't matter what direction I'm travelling in. north,south,east or west. what type of road I'm on a or b, what time of day, morning, noon, night or early hours of the morning. I can guarantee they'll always be f ing red!

    even the pedestrian lights, the other night at 1.30am, bleeding, red. who needs pedestrian lights at that time of the morn, no one was crossing.

    you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    It's the same law of nature that when I go out on my bike the wind is always in my face, but on the way home it's in my face again.

  • This is just a flaw in perception. You only remember the things that are significant in your life and dispense with all the trivial data we could absorb every day. If you do get a lucky run of green lights, you have to go through quite a lot of green lights before you notice your good luck.

    I do believe though that some sets of lights are phased to deliberately slow down traffic. I am sure this is or has been used in London (I don't drive in London much these days).

    It's the opposite of gamblers who remember their £100 win but choose to forget the 20 X £10 losses.

    Next time you drive, just count the reds v the greens. It's a decent chance that it will be 50-50 unless there are jams leading into the jams or lights have more than a two way switch.
  • I find that when I'm in a rush, the lights are miraculously always red. Does my bloody heas in! Especially if I'm running late for a night shift. The roads should be dead at 10 o'clock in the evening!

    You obviously don't work in central London , gridlocked right through the night , lower and upper Thames street IS A BLOODY NIGHTMARE.


  • The lights in Bromley at what was the entrance to Westmoreland Road car park used to wind me up.

    They were always green for the non-existant traffic coming out the car park when I was on my way to work at 3am. Then the invisible pedestrians had to have their turn....followed by the imaginary traffic coming towards me wanting to turn right into the car park. By then I'd fallen asleep and missed the lights turning green. I was so pissed off with them one day I reported the damn things as broken to TfL.
  • Because I'm a complete nause, I was once convinced that the traffic lights on my bike commute from Croydon were always against me, so I counted them. There were 128. On three days I counted them. I hit more than three quarters of them every day. On one of the days I think it was 92 or 95 of them (can't remember the exact figure)

    Now I'm not saying that is representative of all traffic lights, and it might just be that they're phased at just the wrong speed for my average pace (around 22mph) but it showed one thing - there are a lot of fucking traffic lights on the A23, and they're always fucking red...
  • I blame the National Anthem Martin. If we had a more rousing anthem then either the lights would always be green or else even when they were red you would be feeling so inspired you just wouldn't care.

  • Off_it said:

    I blame the National Anthem Martin. If we had a more rousing anthem then either the lights would always be green or else even when they were red you would be feeling so inspired you just wouldn't care.

    that's weird because i could swear I hear it playing, when I'm driving. I just thought I was cursed, now I know I am, off_it!
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  • or more appropriately f ing traffic lights!

    I don't know about you but it doesn't matter what direction I'm travelling in. north,south,east or west. what type of road I'm on a or b, what time of day, morning, noon, night or early hours of the morning. I can guarantee they'll always be f ing red!

    even the pedestrian lights, the other night at 1.30am, bleeding, red. who needs pedestrian lights at that time of the morn, no one was crossing.

    you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    It's the same law of nature that when I go out on my bike the wind is always in my face, but on the way home it's in my face again.

    Could that be anything to do with the fact that you are moving forwards through the air? Perhaps you should try cycling backwards.
  • you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    There may be 3 colours, but there are four sequences, so it's 25% chance.
  • you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    There may be 3 colours, but there are four sequences, so it's 25% chance.
    all right, all right, smart arse;)
  • you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    There may be 3 colours, but there are four sequences, so it's 25% chance.
    and, of course, they aren't at each of those sequences for the same length of time, amber and amber/red are mere seconds, red or green are typically 30s to 1m, so much more than 25% chance of getting red.
  • you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    There may be 3 colours, but there are four sequences, so it's 25% chance.
    and, of course, they aren't at each of those sequences for the same length of time, amber and amber/red are mere seconds, red or green are typically 30s to 1m, so much more than 25% chance of getting red.
    christ, all I'm saying is, that there always bleeding red, when I'm out in me motor.

    I don't need a blinking, maths lesson;)
  • I rode all the way home from work last night - around 30mins - without hitting a single red light, it was great.

    Sadly it did piss down for the entire journey though.

    I hope this news cheers you up.

  • Red, orange or green. Not a lot of difference to many of the drivers in Thailand!
  • London busses are fitted with transponders that prioritise their flow through the traffic lights.

    The electronic signal can change timings and alter sequences between junctions. This sometimes leads to what appears to be strange intervals at the lights (and prevents us from making accurate mental arithmetic equations on our chances of making it to the green light).
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  • What's worse is when some twerp lets someone out from a side road who has just appeared, and they and the twerp just squeeze through the lights as they turn amber, leaving you fuming at a red light!
  • edited June 2016

    Red, orange or green. Not a lot of difference to many of the drivers in Thailand!

    But you can usually turn left on red which helps
  • or more appropriately f ing traffic lights!

    I don't know about you but it doesn't matter what direction I'm travelling in. north,south,east or west. what type of road I'm on a or b, what time of day, morning, noon, night or early hours of the morning. I can guarantee they'll always be f ing red!

    even the pedestrian lights, the other night at 1.30am, bleeding, red. who needs pedestrian lights at that time of the morn, no one was crossing.

    you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    It's the same law of nature that when I go out on my bike the wind is always in my face, but on the way home it's in my face again.

    Could that be anything to do with the fact that you are moving forwards through the air? Perhaps you should try cycling backwards.
    Nah, I'm definitely on the ground. I'm not ET :-)
  • I can sympathise.

    I have a very similar situation on my commute home from work. Coming up from the Tube at Charing X station there is a small departures board. It's after you leave the barriers, but just before you get the escalator up to the station.

    Now one would anticipate that a departures board in this location would be useful. It's in eye shot for a good 10 seconds, I don't even have to stop moving to get a good look at it and it will tell me what platform my train is on.

    EXCEPT IT DOESN'T BECAUSE THE F***ING THING IS ALWAYS ON PAGE 2 OF 2. WITH. OUT. FAIL.

    I don't need to know about trains in 20 minutes time, I'm not turning up to the station 20 minutes early, none of us are. We're turning up because our train is departing in the next few minutes, so tell me where I'll find the bloody thing.

    I presume a Page 1 exists, with the details on it I need, but I wouldn't know, I never see it. I presume it's on Page 1 50% of the time, but I wouldn't know. I NEVER F***ING SEE IT.

    I blame SouthEastern.
  • Red, orange or green. Not a lot of difference to many of the drivers in Thailand!

    Usually red lights I would imagine.
  • I can sympathise.

    I have a very similar situation on my commute home from work. Coming up from the Tube at Charing X station there is a small departures board. It's after you leave the barriers, but just before you get the escalator up to the station.

    Now one would anticipate that a departures board in this location would be useful. It's in eye shot for a good 10 seconds, I don't even have to stop moving to get a good look at it and it will tell me what platform my train is on.

    EXCEPT IT DOESN'T BECAUSE THE F***ING THING IS ALWAYS ON PAGE 2 OF 2. WITH. OUT. FAIL.

    I don't need to know about trains in 20 minutes time, I'm not turning up to the station 20 minutes early, none of us are. We're turning up because our train is departing in the next few minutes, so tell me where I'll find the bloody thing.

    I presume a Page 1 exists, with the details on it I need, but I wouldn't know, I never see it. I presume it's on Page 1 50% of the time, but I wouldn't know. I NEVER F***ING SEE IT.

    I blame SouthEastern.

    Have you tried stopping and getting in everyone's way? I think that's what that board is designed to do.
  • or more appropriately f ing traffic lights!

    I don't know about you but it doesn't matter what direction I'm travelling in. north,south,east or west. what type of road I'm on a or b, what time of day, morning, noon, night or early hours of the morning. I can guarantee they'll always be f ing red!

    even the pedestrian lights, the other night at 1.30am, bleeding, red. who needs pedestrian lights at that time of the morn, no one was crossing.

    you'd think with 3 colours, there'd be at least a 33.3% of getting amber or green but nope, not me, always f ing red!

    Sillav, get yerself a bike. You don't have to worry then :-)
  • I can sympathise.

    I have a very similar situation on my commute home from work. Coming up from the Tube at Charing X station there is a small departures board. It's after you leave the barriers, but just before you get the escalator up to the station.

    Now one would anticipate that a departures board in this location would be useful. It's in eye shot for a good 10 seconds, I don't even have to stop moving to get a good look at it and it will tell me what platform my train is on.

    EXCEPT IT DOESN'T BECAUSE THE F***ING THING IS ALWAYS ON PAGE 2 OF 2. WITH. OUT. FAIL.

    I don't need to know about trains in 20 minutes time, I'm not turning up to the station 20 minutes early, none of us are. We're turning up because our train is departing in the next few minutes, so tell me where I'll find the bloody thing.

    I presume a Page 1 exists, with the details on it I need, but I wouldn't know, I never see it. I presume it's on Page 1 50% of the time, but I wouldn't know. I NEVER F***ING SEE IT.

    I blame SouthEastern.

    Have you tried stopping and getting in everyone's way? I think that's what that board is designed to do.
    Giving this a go today. Will let you know how I get on.
  • I quite like the South Africa name for traffic lights = Robots. Any other names from around the globe other than "fucking traffic lights"?
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