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Things that sound profound but are actuaĺly nonsense. (No politics please.)

iainmentiainment
in Fun, Jokes & Captions
You don't buy beer, you rent it.

Comments

  • Six-a-bag-of-nutsSix-a-bag-of-nuts
    edited December 2016
    "Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely".
    Oh fuck off before I put your teeth down your throat

    Oops sorry, maybe a tad political
  • cafcsingercafcsinger
    I think these threads have had its time
  • Anna_KissedAnna_Kissed
    "The owner doesn't 'do' failure"
  • StigStig
    You can prove anything with statistics. Err right, can you show me that stats for that one then?
  • thai malaysia addickthai malaysia addick
    Stig said:

    You can prove anything with statistics. Err right, can you show me that stats for that one then?

    63.2% of statistics are wrong
  • AddicktedAddickted
    "When the seagulls follow the trawler, it's because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea."
  • i_b_b_o_r_gi_b_b_o_r_g
    You're always in a better position than you think
  • FiiishFiiish
    The grass is always greener.
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    "its always in the last place you look"

    Of course it is as you stop looking when you find it.

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  • 3blokes3blokes
    "It is what it is."
    Right......
    Actually I find myself using this phrase quite a lot whilst inwardly thinking wtf I am talking about?
  • AddicktedAddickted
    A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

    Not to an Australian it isn't.
  • charltonkestoncharltonkeston
    This is where we are.
  • IsawsummersplayIsawsummersplay
    edited December 2016
    The cheque is in the post. We will not sell Lookman in January.
  • GoOnYouHaddocksGoOnYouHaddocks
    I love you.
  • WheresmeticketWheresmeticket
    "It's the thought that counts".

    No. No it isn't.
  • Phantom_UserPhantom_User
    "It's me, not you"
  • DaveMehmetDaveMehmet
    You can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead.
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  • GetOutOfMyClubGetOutOfMyClub
    One Mans Meat is another Mans Poison. Eahh Roland ?
  • IdleHansIdleHans
    GoOnYouHaddocks said:

    I love you.

    "I love you too"
  • McBobbinMcBobbin
    Brexit means Brexit. Up there with "eggs is eggs"
  • bazjonsterbazjonster
    boggzy said:

    Experienced Stadium and venue operator, responsible for managing and developing all aspects of venue services.

    Focused on identifying opportunities and maximising returns by understanding what the customer needs, providing clarity & empowerment to management and forming effective confident front line teams to engage customers and provide excellent service experiences.
    Accomplished at setting up and leading working teams to deliver intricate projects, which include contract openings, mobilisation of new business, property acquisition, planning application and construction programs, organisational development & structural change, new software & system integrations and building refurbishment.

    What a sickly load of vomit inducing corporate crap that really is.
  • Darty ValiantDarty Valiant
    'The problem with internet quotes is that you can never be sure they are accurate'.

    Abraham Lincoln.
  • captainbobcaptainbob
    DaveMehmet said:

    You can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead.

    Deserves a 'Like' for quoting Stan Laurel.
  • AlwaysneilAlwaysneil
    Addickted said:

    A bird in the hand is worth two hands in the bush.

    Not to an Australian it isn't.

    Complete nonsense.
  • StigStig
    My son an I were playing pool. Mrs Stig enters the room.

    Mrs Stig: What happened?
    Me: He beat me again.
    Mrs Stig: Yeah, he's good isn't he.
    Me: And do you know what? He did it with the last shot of the match again, he keeps doing that.
    Mrs Stig: Really!!!!
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Roland Out Forever!