My 16 year old son is a keeper and plays in a side that I co-manage. This season he has had two reckless challenges made on him that were potential leg-breakers. Yesterday was the second of these and it isn't sour grapes on my part, because we won the game. Fortunately, my son was able to carry on with the stud catching him just below the knee rather than on it. Both times it was clearly a frustrated player taking retribution. We also lost a player with one of the worst tackles I have seen in September. The lad has been out all season and we know he now needs an operation. I spoke to the ref about it at the time and he thought he had done his job by giving a free kick and talking to the player. It was the same yesterday, the ref gave a free kick and lectured the player, but didn't even book him.
I always thought it was the job of referees to protect players. What they are doing in youth football is a disgrace and these lads who make these challenges are getting the wrong message. If one of our lads commited a bad foul, we'd take them off. Managers have a responsibility too, but they turn a blind eye if it is one of their players. I am pretty disilusioned with it all today. Will the next potential leg breaker be the one that does it? Refs should be less lenient, not more in youth football when there is anything reckless or dangerous. It is a man's game, but not an ar*****es game! Is it just our league or are too many refs at youth level as bad?
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That lack of discipline at a youth level will keep growing unless it is picked up and dealt with. Whether that is through the opposition manager or the club, it has to be addressed. No club which is well run will be happy to have players, or managers, who think posing a risk to the health of others is acceptable. Who is to say that the player hasn't already done a bad tackle on the opposition already this season which resulted in serious injury and because no one followed it up, the player now thinks they can get away with it?
You can make remarks regarding the referee for every youth game, i would do that. Refs are not immune from constructive feedback to the league and if it's really bad, go to the opposition club secretary with a report.
I know some players who when they lash out it would be seen as out of character, but how can you take anyone elses word for it when you don't know the opposition at all.
And I don't think that the many social media accounts with large audiences of teenage lads help. The likes of ladbible, grassrootsgoals, etc often post footage of horrific challenges from amateur football as if it's 'banter'
I love a proper challenge but these outlets on social media are giving impressionable young players the complete wrong message just so they can improve their likes/views.
I don't think I've really helped you here Muttley, but I had a few minutes to kill while waiting to pick someone up!
Everybody wants to win, but sadly some do at any cost.
I have had to be an official, and had 11 year olds telling me to F***O**. Sent him, and his father off, and had to report the club to the league.
Tend to find cup games at the later stages,when it can bring out the worse in players and parents.
I have had to drop players from team's, sadly because they cannot control themselves on a pitch. In later years I have had to support players at FA hearings as well, so some of my players were not angels, but they are fully grown men, or should be.
There seems to be a lot of 'anger' going about these days, perhaps there always have been. Both of my sons still play, although they have come down a league or two these days sadly cannot fit in the training these days because of work.
Some people have no idea how to behave around kids football, and sadly it's reflected in the behaviour of the kids themselves on the pitch.
My eldest has a quick temper and has been prone to rash, unnecessary fouls. It happens and there are untold kids playing like that. I've spent the last season and a half talking to him about it and encouraging him and he's really grown up this season. Yesterday in his match I saw a real leg-breaker of a challenge , which the referee spoke to the player about. For the rest of the match the kid's Dad was praising him for it and encouraging him to keep getting stuck in like that.
30 minutes later he was booked for lashing out, and his teammates spent the rest of the game shouting at him to calm down. There are some very strange, win at all costs attitudes in kid's football. Sadly, a lot of the fun that should be in it seems to be disappearing.
The first potential leg breaker on my son the ref missed. He booked the kid not long afterwards for dissent. After the game I had a word with the other manager. He treated it far to casually - defending his player when he was pulling sarcastic faces in front of us rather than apologising or showing any remorse.
Ironically the politest bunch of kids I have seen were from the Spurs academy when I attended an open evening.
There's such a rush to remove any culpability from those who do these dangerous tackles that the poor bastards with their shins snapped in two are pretty much peripheral. It verges on victim blaming. It wasn't Taylor's fault, it was clearly accidental, he's not that kind of player. Poor Seamus Coleman might not play again, if he does will he ever return to the level he was before Taylor did something so apparently out of character? Doesn't matter, it was an accident so that's alright.
Kids see this and absorb this even if it's only subconsciously and these nasty challenges go unpunished (relatively - three match ban opposed to the many months that the one on the receiving end is facing) and excused when it's professionals responsible, so why should they do any different?
I took my son out of a club recently. He's 4 years old and there was a kid, Sonny, at his training (wearing a Millwall kit funnily enough) who would constantly slide to take players out. He was rarely near the ball but obviously thought it was a cool thing to do. He was intent on tripping people and hurting people. Nothing more. I had a word with one of the dads there and saw him talking to Sonny's dad the following week but it made no dfference and the sliding continued. I mentioned it to one of the coaches and removed my son from the environment. At that age he just wants to play and run about - not get hurt.
The sad thing is as I got older and started to play adult football it continued. That's when I lost interest in the game. Some people just want to have a fight or hurt people and, for me, I had to get up for work the following day and might not get paid if I am sat in a hospital bed for a week let alone off workfor a prolonged period of time. So I called it a day.
Sad really - I miss the good old days when people played fr a bit of fun and fitness. Not fighting and fucking-up!
Suarez was actually rewarded for being a disgrace by moving to a bigger club on more money!
Remember thinking as a kid that the dad who always stood 50ft away from everyone else was a bit odd. Now I know he was the only sensible one of the lot
No issue with some of the mums getting behind their boys but some of the abuse to the ref, or the comments you here are cringeworthy.
We had one of the nans banned a few weeks ago for shouting at a boy who had fouled her precious grandson.
In my experience it's always always the mums that are worse but then we do have games in Canvey and Basildon...
You couldn't make it up
1. Introduce a respect line (it doesn't have to be an FA one, you can pick them up anywhere). Have at least five yards back from the touchline and the opposite side of the pitch to coaches.
2. Introduce a code of conduct that all players, parents and coaches must sign at the start of every season thefa.com/my-football/football-volunteers/helpforparents/respect/codes%20of%20conduct
The biggest issue for us that we fall into that 20% bracket with no referees. I've had to rope in a parent this weekend so I can actually concentrate on coaching.
I'm sure I've mentioned it before but I was not surprised having seen it myself as a kid playing youth football the parents behaviour was appalling. The first load of nonsense I hear I stopped the game and told them all to act like adult human being's and if they couldn't to go and watch from their cars.
The kids were not angels and last time I did a game some were bigger than me but if you cut that bullshit out early on at least you have a chance. I've always done my share of over enthusiastic tackles but never gobbed off to a referee, it doesn't do anything other than antagonise them and without them there is no football. Anyone who has played in the medway, Kent or Rochester leagues up to about 12 years ago would have encountered Geoff Ford, he would let you get away with some very physical stuff but one obscenity even uttered in frustration would see you getting a red card. Which I actually liked because I knew where I stood and my bad language was half the time whispered to an opponent more skillful than me, which was pretty much every player in the Rochester and district league
Off the top of my head I have told one coach to shut his mouth where he was on my case as well as encouraging behaviour that doesn't need to be encouraged in kids football.
Thankfully, neither myself nor the ex-wife has pushed our daughter towards football. She can't stand it, doesn't like watching it or playing it. Never thought I'd hear myself say it but well pleased. Thankfully, we don't get aggro at Gymnastic competitions. Just the odd cheer and a polite round of applause
Discipline starts with the league and is filtered down to the affiliated clubs. Our league encourages and enforces good behaviour, adherance to the principles of the laws of the game and encourages respect for referees. This culture is taken on board by the clubs.
I have rarely seen any of the incidents described above, be it really bad tackles or parents abusing referees. In fact, to emphasise this point, I refer to any incident/joke by me some years back. I was walking past a game being refereed by a gent, who in his time as a player, gave me loads of stick whilst I was refereeing. As a Joke, I shouted out "keep up with play ref". I was immediately admonished by home spectators (mums/dads)!!
At the lower age groups, we have young referees, 14 years of age or so, who understandably do not have the knowledge, or man-management skills. Yet the spectators never ever criticise the young refs. It seems to be recognised that the young refs are at the start of a long learning curve, the same as young players are.
The odd helmet parent is about and more noticeable the elder the kids get .
One thing all mine have drilled in to them is that no matter how bad the ref is you respect his decision and go and say thank you at the end of the game to them because there is no game with out these people , same with their managers , I always get my boys to thank them because these things don't just happen someone has to organise all this footy .
I've just turned down the chance to manage one of my sons at u-8 next season , don't need the agg from parents and also I'm surprised that the parents whilst watching training let their kids piss about rather than disciplining them and expecting the coach to do it .
Also wanna be able to watch the others throughout the season.
Son played in a school footy tournament yesterday and a 15 year old girl who was refereeing one of the pitches (she was shockingly bad and not confident enough to referee 11 year olds ) ended up leaving early in tears because some of the comments from the sidelines upset her .
I had said after she reffed our first game which we won 3-0 that in a closer match there could be problems because she never really took control and whoever grabbed the ball first won the throw in but that doesn't excuse grown adults not being able to control themselves .
An old teacher took over and told everyone on the touch line he'd get anyone who said anything untoward escorted off the school premises, funnnily enough everyone shut up .
A dad told me that at Orient youth levels (I think he said ) if any parent gave any grief the kid was substituted and not allowed to play, which I think is a great idea and makes the dumb parents think twice before blabbing off .
In adult football you see these montages of bad tackles on you tube and wince ...maybe i was guilty of these when i was younger but theres so much thats filmed these days compared to then
Its an ingrained Culture,the coaches,the parents the refs etc ...i cant see how it would ever change ..
( i had an experience ,not directly, where a parental argument escalated and someone threatened to go back to their car and get their Gun ! ... thats the Hood for you )