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Injuries in bed
Covered End
Posts: 52,008
A couple of years ago I was having a nightmare and was being frightened by a crazed Ainsley Harriot.
I hit out at him and woke up with a painful hand where I had punched the bedside mini chest of drawers.
Last night I was Glen Hoddle in the 70's playing for England at Wembley.
I'd found myself in open space about 30 yards from goal.
I received a short pass and I ran forward stretching to reach the ball and hitting it first time.
A beautiful shot smashed into the top corner of the goal. Aaaarrrgghh.
I woke up having volleyed the chest of drawers underneath the bedroom window to the side of the bed.
Wow did my big toe hurt (still hurting now lol).
I hit out at him and woke up with a painful hand where I had punched the bedside mini chest of drawers.
Last night I was Glen Hoddle in the 70's playing for England at Wembley.
I'd found myself in open space about 30 yards from goal.
I received a short pass and I ran forward stretching to reach the ball and hitting it first time.
A beautiful shot smashed into the top corner of the goal. Aaaarrrgghh.
I woke up having volleyed the chest of drawers underneath the bedroom window to the side of the bed.
Wow did my big toe hurt (still hurting now lol).
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I often dream of Salma Hayek and think i've died and rigor mortice has set in.2
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Collapsed rectal muscles.5
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I have dreamt i was playing football and leapt for a header and nutted the wall, claret everywhere and a story my mum and brother like to bring up.2
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Bugger thatDaveMehmet said:Collapsed rectal muscles.
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Not a bad injury, but in my younger days I regularly took some great slip catches, after a vivid dream I woke up on the bedroom floor with bruised ribs and clutching the clock of the cabinet, always wondered if I took off and dived as graceful as a swallow or plummeted like a dying camel.1
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Covered End said:A couple of years ago I was having a nightmare and was being frightened by a crazed Ainsley Harriot.
I hit out at him and woke up with a painful hand where I had punched the bedside mini chest of drawers.
Last night I was Glen Hoddle in the 70's playing for England at Wembley.
I'd found myself in open space about 30 yards from goal.
I received a short pass and I ran forward stretching to reach the ball and hitting it first time.
A beautiful shot smashed into the top corner of the goal. Aaaarrrgghh.
I woke up having volleyed the chest of drawers underneath the bedroom window to the side of the bed.
Wow did my big toe hurt (still hurting now lol).
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I've managed to avoid injury - my wife uses the restraints.That said, I dreamed last night (true) that I had picked a fight with three spanners at London Bridge.0
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Just over a year ago i dropped my phone out of bed. Rolling over to reach it i tore the rotor cuff in my shoulder. Still sore now.0
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Not an injury, but after a day visiting distilleries in Scotland I fell asleep on the train and was having this nice dream where a cat was rubbing her head against my arm
Then I woke up and it had been the train guard letting me know we had reached the terminus!2 -
I’ve done mine recently, it fucking hurts.Baldybonce said:Just over a year ago i dropped my phone out of bed. Rolling over to reach it i tore the rotor cuff in my shoulder. Still sore now.0 - Sponsored links:
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When I first started going out with the wife I woke up an aching cheek, years later the now Mrs told our eldest that one time when we were a new couple I farted in bed and she meant to thump my pillow, but hit me just below the eye. Then pretended to be asleep.6
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I occasionally get cramp in the back of my leg especially at night which is extremely painful to try and deal with
Only the other night it happened whilst I was recovering from a really bad back... So this cramp starts shooting down my leg (which usually results in me sitting up and trying to get out of bed to stretch it), only this time my back is stopping from sitting up properly so had to deal with the pain from both.0 -
I once pulled a stunner1
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I dreamt one night that i was eating the worlds largest marshmellow. I woke up the next morning and one of my pillows was missing...
Spoiler alert: Joke has been used at least three times before on CL by me, but i don't care.5 -
#nichebobmunro said:I've managed to avoid injury - my wife uses the restraints.That said, I dreamed last night (true) that I had picked a fight with three spanners at London Bridge.1 -
One of my best mates tore his foreskin like a sheet of paper and to this day there are people who call him rumple splitskin without knowing his actual name
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This thread wasn't what I thought it would be. It has a lot of potential though. I'll be back in a few hours.
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So you fisted Ainsley Harriot in your dream ?Covered End said:A couple of years ago I was having a nightmare and was being frightened by a crazed Ainsley Harriot.
I hit out at him and woke up with a painful hand where I had punched the bedside mini chest of drawers.
Last night I was Glen Hoddle in the 70's playing for England at Wembley.
I'd found myself in open space about 30 yards from goal.
I received a short pass and I ran forward stretching to reach the ball and hitting it first time.
A beautiful shot smashed into the top corner of the goal. Aaaarrrgghh.
I woke up having volleyed the chest of drawers underneath the bedroom window to the side of the bed.
Wow did my big toe hurt (still hurting now lol).
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Not with a toddler around unfortunately2
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I had a dream where I was lying on a beach. All of a sudden the clouds started dropping out of the sky and I had to roll sideways to avoid them.
I woke up on the bedroom floor with quite a lot of blood dripping from my chin. After a moment of panic, I found the tiniest cut imaginable and the bedside cabinet drawer-handle was broken off.1 - Sponsored links:
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I got knocked out when the block and tackle broke off from the ceiling and hit me right on the bridge of my nose.2
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Old Tommy Cooper gag.😂soapy_jones said:I dreamt one night that i was eating the worlds largest marshmellow. I woke up the next morning and one of my pillows was missing...
Spoiler alert: Joke has been used at least three times before on CL by me, but i don't care.0 -
When I was in ICU I had some absolutely horrendous dreams, strangely I can remember them all.0
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I used to have extremely vivid dreams, and talk and act out in my sleep. They've got far less dramatic over the years.
I remember one - been married about three months and the wife (now ex wife) hadn't experienced any of this before. She'd hung a picture over the bed that day and it must have been on my mind, because I woke her up in the middle of the night whispering (for some reason) not to move because there was glass on her chest. Apparently I said it in such an urgent tone that she shat herself and lay there for 30 seconds before punching me awake and calling me a c***. I also once shouted out "FUCKING BARBECUE SAUCE, ON PIZZA?" totally at random, and sleepwalked out of my flat in Reigate, down the stairs and out into the communal gardens, when I 'woke up' I was standing in my pants in the middle of the grounds without a key to get back in. That was a fun 5 minutes ringing every buzzer at 3 in the morning...9 -
Given both of you clearly had being such pottymouths in common, I can't imagine where it went wrongLeroy Ambrose said:I used to have extremely vivid dreams, and talk and act out in my sleep. They've got far less dramatic over the years.
I remember one - been married about three months and the wife (now ex wife) hadn't experienced any of this before. She'd hung a picture over the bed that day and it must have been on my mind, because I woke her up in the middle of the night whispering (for some reason) not to move because there was glass on her chest. Apparently I said it in such an urgent tone that she shat herself and lay there for 30 seconds before punching me awake and calling me a c***. I also once shouted out "FUCKING BARBECUE SAUCE, ON PIZZA?" totally at random, and sleepwalked out of my flat in Reigate, down the stairs and out into the communal gardens, when I 'woke up' I was standing in my pants in the middle of the grounds without a key to get back in. That was a fun 5 minutes ringing every buzzer at 3 in the morning... 2 -
Worse than that. She's Sicilian. So it was like getting verbally rinsed by a mid-level mobster.Huskaris said:
Given both of you clearly had being such pottymouths in common, I can't imagine where it went wrongLeroy Ambrose said:I used to have extremely vivid dreams, and talk and act out in my sleep. They've got far less dramatic over the years.
I remember one - been married about three months and the wife (now ex wife) hadn't experienced any of this before. She'd hung a picture over the bed that day and it must have been on my mind, because I woke her up in the middle of the night whispering (for some reason) not to move because there was glass on her chest. Apparently I said it in such an urgent tone that she shat herself and lay there for 30 seconds before punching me awake and calling me a c***. I also once shouted out "FUCKING BARBECUE SAUCE, ON PIZZA?" totally at random, and sleepwalked out of my flat in Reigate, down the stairs and out into the communal gardens, when I 'woke up' I was standing in my pants in the middle of the grounds without a key to get back in. That was a fun 5 minutes ringing every buzzer at 3 in the morning...
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