Are there any lazy, tedious TV angles that repeatedly irritate you? I'll kick off with these:
1. A handful of Scousers waving their scarves trying to recreate 1977 next to that geezer with all the badges. Anyone who's been there knows how false the myth that they're deafening at every home game really is.
2. Fans streaming out before the final whistle, especially if it's a game affecting relegation. Sometimes it's just the usual sad early-leavers, but can be made to look synmolic of the club's malaise.
3. The angst-ridden fan just before the final whistle; perhaps with sobbing girlfriend. How do they find one among 25000 fans?
4. Roman f***ing Abramovic! Why? He's just not news any more. We don't see close-ups of Richard Murray every week.
5. Brazilian babes in bikinis - oh OK, that one's not really annoying.
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7. Hearing the crowd cheer, but never getting to see the streaker / pitch invader
the fact that the sub has been warming up and is now putting his shin pads on off camera has not influenced his prediction.
Put it away lads.
The same mind numbing visual placements happen in films too. London - Tower Bridge; Paris - Eiffel Tower; New York - Manhattan skyline and/or Brooklyn Bridge; San Francisco - Transamerica Pyramid and/or a tram.... Cut the cliches and get on with it.
- Close ups of "WAGs" that have attended a game to watch their latest goldmine in between texting their agents. If I want to see 3rd rate perma tanned dolly birds I'd buy Heat magazine.
- Close ups of dignitaries or celeb fans like Hugh Grant who although never expressed an interest in football before euro 96 now mysteriously have no problem in securing tickets for sell out games that the average supporter can only dream of.
- Shots of 50,000 geordies in replica shirts who have convinced themselves it is "their time" after they score against Wigan upon Keegan/ Shearer/ Barry Venison's return to SJP.
- Any close up of Ian Dowie
I don't mind this much so much as the way that the very instant the people recognise themselves on the big screen they cut the shot. If they are going to allow people fifteen seconds of fame at least let them genuinely have it rather than tease them. It comes across as a form of voyeurism with the cameraman spying on people but turning away the second they are caught.
Urrrgghh