Strangers striking up a conversation at the urinal
Ha! I did this to Johnny Jackson after the pre season at Greenwich Borough this year. Was actually telling my missus about it a couple of nights ago as we were talking about the disappointment of meeting your heroes when I said I'd been stood smoking a fag on the corner of Clipstone street near radio 1 many years ago and saw Liam Gallagher pottering about but didn't want to speak to him in case he was a twat and I had to iron him out and then take down all my oasis posters.
Anyhow Jackson has been my favourite Charlton player since mendonca so was chuffed when he took the urinal next to the one I was using in the portakabin toilets at GBFC.
Struck up a well meaning, well wishing conversation but he was uncharacteristicslly very cold and wary which left me feeling disappointed and embarrassed as if I was being perceived as some sort of oddball cottager that prowled lower league grounds in the summer months on fishing expeditions.
As my wife pointed out when I mentioned it the other night she said he was probably short because you were stood at the urinals with your cocks in your hands rather than him not being chatty which I have consoled myself is probably true to some degree.
Either that or he just thought I was a bit of a c***. The truth is probably somewhere inbetween and I will likely ponder it for the remainder of my days.
I don't think it helped starting the conversation with "hello Johnny, nice cock mate!"
No I think the clincher was probably 'Johnnie has your cock gone like your legs?'
Ha! Yeah in retrospect that was probably it Len :-)
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
Do you mean in cars or on the London Underground.
Personally I see them as a warning that there's a baby in the car in front so please don't drive up the car in fronts arse putting that child at unneeded risk.
When they're on pregnant women on the underground, i think those not offering a seat when none are available are absolute c**ts.
This also applies if they don't have a badge but are obviously preggers.
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
I thought those solely existed not because its an attempt to stop tailgating yet if there is an accident, the emergency services are aware and will attempt to get the baby out of danger first?
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
I thought those solely existed not because its an attempt to stop tailgating yet if there is an accident, the emergency services are aware and will attempt to get the baby out of danger first?
What annoys me personally about them is not that they exist or are on the car as I think it's sensible and could help tame the driving of someone intent on being a div. The annoyance comes when the driver of the liveried up offspring carrier drives dangerously.
Surely people don't actually get annoyed by a sign on another driver's car?
Got a few have you?
I have "Baby on board", "Dog on board", "Fairy on board", "Bitch on board", "Vegan on board" and of course "Whole Food Plant based dieter on board".
But those are just the ones on my car, the Mrs only has Baby on board.
Just thinking how these signs would actually affect my behaviour...
Baby - No impact, I had no intention of crashing into you anyway Dog - May tailgate to see if I can get a closer look Fairy - Get alongside and flutter eyelids (if a fellow male driver) Bitch - Flip the v's at your Mrs. as a show of solidarity Vegan - Pelt car with chicken breasts Whole food plant based dieter - Sacrifice myself to take them out and save others future tedious conversations
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
I thought those solely existed not because its an attempt to stop tailgating yet if there is an accident, the emergency services are aware and will attempt to get the baby out of danger first?
Urban Myth, when I was in the job, we were trained to look in the vehicle to see how many people were in the vehicle.
Surely people don't actually get annoyed by a sign on another driver's car?
Got a few have you?
I have "Baby on board", "Dog on board", "Fairy on board", "Bitch on board", "Vegan on board" and of course "Whole Food Plant based dieter on board".
But those are just the ones on my car, the Mrs only has Baby on board.
Just thinking how these signs would actually affect my behaviour...
Baby - No impact, I had no intention of crashing into you anyway Dog - May tailgate to see if I can get a closer look Fairy - Get alongside and flutter eyelids (if a fellow male driver) Bitch - Flip the v's at your Mrs. as a show of solidarity Vegan - Pelt car with chicken breasts Whole food plant based dieter - Sacrifice myself to take them out and save others future tedious conversations
Fortunately we only have the Baby on Board one and it's on the Mrs' car and not mine.
Loved the reply though. Glad I now know a way of getting free chicken breasts!
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
Having offered my seat and been rudely rejected by a woman who transpired to be just fat, I think for everyone's own embarrassment they should be mandatory on public transport.
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
I thought those solely existed not because its an attempt to stop tailgating yet if there is an accident, the emergency services are aware and will attempt to get the baby out of danger first?
Even if it were true, some of them are still stuck in the back window when the baby it was supposedly designed to protect is actually old enough to drive the fucking thing...
Surely people don't actually get annoyed by a sign on another driver's car?
Got a few have you?
I have "Baby on board", "Dog on board", "Fairy on board", "Bitch on board", "Vegan on board" and of course "Whole Food Plant based dieter on board".
But those are just the ones on my car, the Mrs only has Baby on board.
Just thinking how these signs would actually affect my behaviour...
Baby - No impact, I had no intention of crashing into you anyway Dog - May tailgate to see if I can get a closer look Fairy - Get alongside and flutter eyelids (if a fellow male driver) Bitch - Flip the v's at your Mrs. as a show of solidarity Vegan - Pelt car with chicken breasts Whole food plant based dieter - Sacrifice myself to take them out and save others future tedious conversations
Make sure it is frozen chicken to create maximum damage.
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
Do you mean in cars or on the London Underground.
Personally I see them as a warning that there's a baby in the car in front so please don't drive up the car in fronts arse putting that child at unneeded risk.
When they're on pregnant women on the underground, i think those not offering a seat when none are available are absolute c**ts.
This also applies if they don't have a badge but are obviously preggers.
Women just generally walking around London. "Ohhh look at me, some bloke chucked his dirty water up me"
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
Do you mean in cars or on the London Underground.
Personally I see them as a warning that there's a baby in the car in front so please don't drive up the car in fronts arse putting that child at unneeded risk.
When they're on pregnant women on the underground, i think those not offering a seat when none are available are absolute c**ts.
This also applies if they don't have a badge but are obviously preggers.
Women just generally walking around London. I'm thinking I dont give a f*** if some bloke chucked his dirty water up you.
Those 'baby on board' badges. Humanity have got this far without them.
Do you mean in cars or on the London Underground.
Personally I see them as a warning that there's a baby in the car in front so please don't drive up the car in fronts arse putting that child at unneeded risk.
When they're on pregnant women on the underground, i think those not offering a seat when none are available are absolute c**ts.
This also applies if they don't have a badge but are obviously preggers.
Women just generally walking around London. I'm thinking I dont give a f*** if some bloke chucked his dirty water up you.
Comments
Personally I see them as a warning that there's a baby in the car in front so please don't drive up the car in fronts arse putting that child at unneeded risk.
When they're on pregnant women on the underground, i think those not offering a seat when none are available are absolute c**ts.
This also applies if they don't have a badge but are obviously preggers.
But those are just the ones on my car, the Mrs only has Baby on board.
Baby - No impact, I had no intention of crashing into you anyway
Dog - May tailgate to see if I can get a closer look
Fairy - Get alongside and flutter eyelids (if a fellow male driver)
Bitch - Flip the v's at your Mrs. as a show of solidarity
Vegan - Pelt car with chicken breasts
Whole food plant based dieter - Sacrifice myself to take them out and save others future tedious conversations
Loved the reply though. Glad I now know a way of getting free chicken breasts!
Take a tip from someone that knows, she don't do mornings.
There is never an excuse for such moronic abuse of the Queens.