My Beautiful Boy, Gilbert RIP.

jimmymelrose said:

What a relief. When I read that first sentence I thought the OP had lost his son.

I know losing a pet can be tough but the thread is a bit misleading. I told my wife that someone on here had lost his son before I’d scrolled down to the photos, and she told me of a emergency in the hospital where a 19 year old road worker had a truckload of 200 degree bitumen fall on him from the truck and he died of 1st degree burns.

I agree. I thought somebody had lost their son. I was shocked when I saw that but I was relieved when I saw it wasn’t. I know dogs and all pets are precious and I know how difficult it is when they pass but not on the same scale as losing a son. 

Rob said:

jimmymelrose said:

What a relief. When I read that first sentence I thought the OP had lost his son.

I know losing a pet can be tough but the thread is a bit misleading. I told my wife that someone on here had lost his son before I’d scrolled down to the photos, and she told me of a emergency in the hospital where a 19 year old road worker had a truckload of 200 degree bitumen fall on him from the truck and he died of 1st degree burns.

I agree. I thought somebody had lost their son. I was shocked when I saw that but I was relieved when I saw it wasn’t. I know dogs and all pets are precious and I know how difficult it is when they pass but not on the same scale as losing a son. 

There is no hierarchy, it is simply about the bond. Some are closer than others. As a person that has felt the despair of the loss of a child and that of many pets, I can honestly say, they ALL always matter. 

Grief and love doesn't have a league table, hence I can't say I love one child more than another (like 🤔).

Bereavement is simply that. If it hurts it hurts. There is no right way to feel or for how long. It is our business to share in someone else's grief, however it is not our business to decide for them how they should fee (not suggesting anyone has said that). 

The outpouring of compassion for our fellow fans / dog owners, in their hours of despair, makes it clear that when you know, you know!

Talking is the most important thing. It reminds us that despite our momentary feelings that this is a bit too much to bear, life goes on, and we carry the feelings of our loss with us going forwards.

I think it's entirely subjective, and so most probably a bit of a pointless conversation tbh

The Prince-e-Paul said:

Rob said:

jimmymelrose said:

What a relief. When I read that first sentence I thought the OP had lost his son.

I know losing a pet can be tough but the thread is a bit misleading. I told my wife that someone on here had lost his son before I’d scrolled down to the photos, and she told me of a emergency in the hospital where a 19 year old road worker had a truckload of 200 degree bitumen fall on him from the truck and he died of 1st degree burns.

I agree. I thought somebody had lost their son. I was shocked when I saw that but I was relieved when I saw it wasn’t. I know dogs and all pets are precious and I know how difficult it is when they pass but not on the same scale as losing a son. 

There is no hierarchy, it is simply about the bond. Some are closer than others. As a person that has felt the despair of the loss of a child and that of many pets, I can honestly say, they ALL always matter. 

Grief and love doesn't have a league table, hence I can't say I love one child more than another (like 🤔).

Bereavement is simply that. If it hurts it hurts. There is no right way to feel or for how long. It is our business to share in someone else's grief, however it is not our business to decide for them how they should fee (not suggesting anyone has said that). 

The outpouring of compassion for our fellow fans / dog owners, in their hours of despair, makes it clear that when you know, you know!

Talking is the most important thing. It reminds us that despite our momentary feelings that this is a bit too much to bear, life goes on, and we carry the feelings of our loss with us going forwards.

I think the majority of people would have a hierarchy when it comes to grief- undoubtedly loss is terrible.

LargeAddick said:

MuttleyCAFC said:

What non dog owners need to understand about dogs is that they are not just pets to many of us. They are incredibly emotionly intelligent. In some cases more so than humans. They have characters and show genuine love. We call JJ, our dog, a family member rather than a pet because that is how we see him. He has excellent communication skills so we always know what he is telling us. 

The problem with dogs is that they have relatively short lives. JJ is now nine and you start to think of the terrible time ahead. Fortunately he is a small dog and they tend to live longer but losing him is a terrible thought but we know it will happen some day. Gilbert wasn't just a pet, he was something magnificent showing what an incredible bond can be created between different species. 

All so true. Not having kids our dogs are our kids. When we eventually lose them we will be devastated. For us it will be like losing a child, although some won’t understand that and say there is no comparison but for us there is.

I think trying to find a comparison when describing grief is pointless. If it hurts it hurts. Not everyone else is affected the same with separation from a loved one.

How we all digest out emotions and rebound from being hit by the shit stick is very personal and individual. It's ok to feel fecking awful when you dog, cat, rabbit, budgie etc dies.

When Winnie, my old Labrador died 6 years ago at almost 17, I was bereft. I am often left wondering how and why some other people seem unaffected by such emotional tragedies!

I got another rescue Lab within months. He's a fecking liability and I love him to bits. 

LargeAddick said:

MuttleyCAFC said:

What non dog owners need to understand about dogs is that they are not just pets to many of us. They are incredibly emotionly intelligent. In some cases more so than humans. They have characters and show genuine love. We call JJ, our dog, a family member rather than a pet because that is how we see him. He has excellent communication skills so we always know what he is telling us. 

The problem with dogs is that they have relatively short lives. JJ is now nine and you start to think of the terrible time ahead. Fortunately he is a small dog and they tend to live longer but losing him is a terrible thought but we know it will happen some day. Gilbert wasn't just a pet, he was something magnificent showing what an incredible bond can be created between different species. 

All so true. Not having kids our dogs are our kids. When we eventually lose them we will be devastated. For us it will be like losing a child, although some won’t understand that and say there is no comparison but for us there is.

If you haven't lost a child you'd struggle to understand it - thankfully most people don't experience this. 

hoof_it_up_to_benty said:

LargeAddick said:

MuttleyCAFC said:

What non dog owners need to understand about dogs is that they are not just pets to many of us. They are incredibly emotionly intelligent. In some cases more so than humans. They have characters and show genuine love. We call JJ, our dog, a family member rather than a pet because that is how we see him. He has excellent communication skills so we always know what he is telling us. 

The problem with dogs is that they have relatively short lives. JJ is now nine and you start to think of the terrible time ahead. Fortunately he is a small dog and they tend to live longer but losing him is a terrible thought but we know it will happen some day. Gilbert wasn't just a pet, he was something magnificent showing what an incredible bond can be created between different species. 

All so true. Not having kids our dogs are our kids. When we eventually lose them we will be devastated. For us it will be like losing a child, although some won’t understand that and say there is no comparison but for us there is.

If you haven't lost a child you'd struggle to understand it - thankfully most people don't experience this. 

Having experienced both, both are shit.

There are no weighing scales for grief. I grieved when my daughter died the day she was born (which I shared on here in 2011 and received much love and support). When my dog died in 2019, after 16 wonderful years together, again I grieved (which I shared on here and again received wonderful support). 

When life is shit, it is just that! High praise and thanks to this loving community for sharing in life's highs and lows. 

Run free Lily.

Sorry to hear this.  Lost our lovely dog to cancer last year.