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My wife hates football...

RedZed333
RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
edited June 2010 in Fun, Jokes & Captions
I just got in from work and my wife gave me a big wet kiss on the lips...

I said 'Upstairs...'

She said 'Ooooh, you sexy beast, are you going to ravish me...?'

I said 'No, World Cup football's on the telly, now fcuk off upstairs...'

Women, they just don't understand, do they..!!

Comments

  • Miserableoldgit
    Miserableoldgit Posts: 21,458
    Mrs MOG wants Me to take Her shopping.....
    As Algarve said yesterday, She knows where the bus-stop is........
  • RedZed333
    RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
    My wife bought me a new vacuum flask for the World Cup, she says it's great because you if you put hot things in it it keeps them hot and if you put cold things in it it keeps them cold...

    I say what have you put in it...?

    She says two cups of coffee and a choc ice...

    Thick or what...?
  • The Red Robin
    The Red Robin Posts: 26,126
    He's here all week!
  • ken from bexley
    ken from bexley Posts: 5,083
    That is the trouble with you 'romantics' you always go for the easy life, and all your 'sweet talk'!

    Marriage is a give a take relationship..... 'I give and the wife takes' always worked for me!
  • RedZed333
    RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
    [cite]Posted By: ken from bexley[/cite]That is the trouble with you 'romantics' you always go for the easy life, and all your 'sweet talk'!

    Marriage is a give a take relationship..... 'I give and the wife takes' always worked for me!
    Totally agree, Ken, I don't know how they put up with us sometimes...

    My wife bought me one of those 'mood rings' to detect my moods...

    When I'm happy it turns green and when I'm in a bad mood it leaves a fcuking big red mark on her forehead...
  • jimmymelrose
    jimmymelrose Posts: 9,750
    Get a divorce - quick!
  • RedZed333
    RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
    She says she was unhappy about there being so much football on the telly and asked me to console her...

    So I hit her with my XBox...
  • 101
    101 Posts: 2,456
    Missis don't wanna watch it but knows that all day I will be chilling watching footie
  • Hig
    Hig Posts: 454
    [cite]Posted By: RedZed333[/cite]She says she was unhappy about there being so much football on the telly and asked me to console her...

    So I hit her with my XBox...

    Theres a lot of sickipedia & text jokes going down here . . .
  • RedZed333
    RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
    [cite]Posted By: Addick Hig[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: RedZed333[/cite]She says she was unhappy about there being so much football on the telly and asked me to console her...

    So I hit her with my XBox...

    Theres a lot of sickipedia & text jokes going down here . . .
    They're all true stories...;0)
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  • Hig
    Hig Posts: 454
    :-)
  • johnnybev1987
    johnnybev1987 Posts: 11,410
    lol some very good jokes, what the hell was Rupert on about??? someone wants everyone to know he has a missus ;O)
  • RedZed333
    RedZed333 Posts: 3,103
    Wife: 'Who's' playing ..?'

    Me: 'Serbia and Ghana...'

    Wife: 'Which one's Serbia...?'

    Me: Disbelieving stare...
  • bigstemarra
    bigstemarra Posts: 5,098
    Badum-Tish!
  • LawrieAbrahams
    LawrieAbrahams Posts: 3,779
    Mike Parry said it was Ghana v Siberia

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