A Palace fan, a Muslim and a Hindu are travelling together on a journey. Night comes and they arrive at an inn but when they arrived there, the innkeeper told them he only had 2 beds free, one of them would have to sleep in the barn.
"That`s OK", said the Muslim , "I`ll sleep in the barn."
So off he went. A few moments later there was a knock at the inn door. The innkeeper opened the door to see the Muslim who explained that he was unable to sleep in the barn as there was a pig in there, and he could not sleep with a pig.
"That`s OK," said the Hindu, "I`ll sleep there."
So off he went. A few moments later there was a knock at the inn door. The innkeeper opened the door to see the Hindu there, who explained that he was unable to sleep in the barn as there was a cow in there, and he could not sleep with a cow.
"That`s OK," said the Palace fan, "I`ll sleep there."
So off he went
A few moments later there was a knock at the inn door. The innkeeper opened the door to see a cow and a pig stood there......
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(stick em in the right category E in future please, cheers)
At last, a good prospect was identified. He was asked to come to Sellout Park for a trial and did well enough to impress the management. The youth was a lifelong Palace fan and was overjoyed at the thought of joining the Club.
The only remaining obstacle was the medical examination. The club doctor put the lad through all the tests and could find nothing to fault; the boy was in peak physical condition. It was only during a close physical examination that the doctor detected that the youth was circumcised.
"I'm sorry, son," he told the boy, "But I'm afraid I can't recommend the manager to take you on."
The lad was dumbfounded.
"How come'?" he cried.
"Well," said the doctor, "Everybody knows you've got to be a complete dick to play for Palace ."
A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of romaine lettuce,
A 2 lb. can of coffee, and
A 1 lb. package of bacon.
As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk
standing behind me watched as I placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated,
"You must be single."
I was a bit startled by this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the
derelict's intuition, since I was indeed single. I looked at the six
items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about my selections
that could have tipped off the drunk to my marital status.
Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: "Well, you know what, you're
absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."
'You know what I'd like you to build a 40ft inpenetrable concrete wall around Selhurst Park so no scummy Charltob fans can get in our ground or share it again, in fact I don't want anyone other than Palace in the place.'
Done says the genie, and the wall is up.
The Genie turns to the Charlton fan.
And for your wish?
'40ft wall you say? Fill the f8cker with water'