Taking threads away from their original subjects

Addick Addict

My 5 year old son keeps playing "whoever puts the phone down first wins". How do I know he's telling the truth when he says he won?

ShootersHillGuru

I`m an urban spaceman.

Chris_from_Sidcup

My god it's cold out

Weegie Addick

Aww, congratulations. How lovely. What are you going to call it?

PeanutsMolloy

Mrs Knickerbater's exploded!!

DA9

But does natural yoghurt really work, it itches like mad

Solidgone

.......That's why my grandmother likes her new track suit.

pilchard

If life gives you Lemons make..cream soda

Curb_It

he talks a load of boolocks.

PeanutsMolloy

not my words Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine!

AFKABartram

Anything but Fairytale of New York

bingaddick

...and thats how they made real lemonade

Henry Irving

So how about a boycott?

Henry Irving

Is it "should have" or "should of"?

carly burn

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.

BDL

Bollocks

kimbo

Do you think it will snow?

Morts-Genius

so many chances squandered.......

bloodnut

I can count to 3 in french, but i cant write it down, you'll just have to trust i can say it.

Bye for now....

paulbaconsarnie

....it must have been a good 3 mile trek through the back streets of barnsley to find this pub.

BlackForestReds

Maybe if we try turning the club on and off?

BlackForestReds

Ah! Isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

PeanutsMolloy

...that's very nearly an armful.

AFKABartram

What, with these feet ????

bingaddick

"there were 150 of us living in shoe box in middle of motorway"
"Cardboard box?"
"Aye"
"You were lucky"

Miserableoldgit

....then Jack Straw came in and sat with us.
Nearly bought us a pint, he did.

Henry Irving

I don't rate this new signing at all. Not the position we need to strengthen.

AFKABartram

SINK !!

Dazzler21

Floaters smell worse than sinkers ;o)

paulbaconsarnie

... then he said "sorry. we don't do duvets"