Best Drunken Trophy

JollyRobin

DISCLAIMER: This thread in no way condones or supports theft of any nature.

So what is the best thing you've stolen while drunk?

Last Christmas (to be fair it coming home from a New Years party so I didn't feel to Grinch-esq) me and a mate of mine stole an 8 foot Christmas tree made completely from baubles from somebodies front garden.

Anyone got any other hilarious acquirements on a drunken trip back from the pub/club/party?

ValleyGary

In the wrongen up Bexleyheath when i was about 18. Me & my mates, about 8 of us, took it in turns to smuggle books of the shelves and place them stratigically outside. By about 8 o'clock we could have opened a library.....at the bus stop. People were jumping off the 96 and asking to buy The Canterbury Tales.

CAFCsayer

A cracked rib...

cafcdan18

Nothing special, only a lot of pint glasses and a few cones/traffic signs.

NathanPrior

A Scottish hat with a ginger wig, dont ask

BlackForestReds

A St George's flag, I had to climb up a trellis to get it.

JT

A concrete bird bath

Ross

My mate (RIP) stole a framed painting from a local pub and passed it off as a part of his GCSE coursework.

Bournemouth Addick

Not me (honest) but my flatmate once came home with a lollipop man's lollipop which lived in our place for several years afterwards. He claimed to have "found it" outside a cafe.

Leroy Ambrose

My mate's sister's virginity

EastStand

a few friends and i were thrown out of a pub for being generally stupid a couple of years back.
feeling embarrassed, slighted and drunk we proceeded to steal the coffin shaped events board from outside the pub entrance.
i still have it in my room.

CAFCsayer

[cite]Posted By: Leroy Ambrose[/cite]My mate's sister's virginity

Winner

Leroy Ambrose

[cite]Posted By: UP...THE...ADDICKS[/cite]

[cite]Posted By: Leroy Ambrose[/cite]My mate's sister's virginity

Winner

In some respects, yes. In others... no.

SE9

Me and a couple of mates took a tv of the wall in Auctioneer pub in greenwich and took it home, the pub was packed and people couldnt believe what they was seeing. We gave it back the day after.

Mortimerician

[cite]Posted By: ross[/cite]My mate (RIP) stole a framed painting from a local pub and passed it off as a part of his GCSE coursework.

Quality RIP Ross's mate

Leroy Ambrose

Actually, a few years ago outside a boozer in Norwood me and a few mates got kicked out for no reason (some pricks started a row at the pool table and, because they were (ahem) 'locals' the landlord told us to f*** off). We stole the LNB off the satellite dish. Was a f***er to get to as well, two of us had to climb up the wall and pull it off (which my mate did by hanging on the thing until it broke)

Marco

Aside from the usual street furniture, (through the fog of alcohol) I once thought that stealing an ambulance was a good idea.
20+ years later I am appalled by my youthful stupidity.
Luckily, we only managed about 2 metres before legging it, which wasn't enough to get onto the open road from the parking area.

C.Walsh'sLoveChild

Managed to get 2 bowling balls out of Bloomfield Bowling Lanes on a club night thing. That was a challenge. Especially the night bus back to Lewisham carrying them all the poxy way. I imagine they are still in the attic of 100 Longhurst Road if anyone wants to go collect

carly burn

Bell and 20foot Bell rope from a small church just outside Malia.

mascot88

an ice bucket for your white wine from some bar in Bromley, had a date the next day, thought that look good...

How the bouncer didnt notice I had it under my jacket I dont know...

RedArmySE7

I used to frequent Langtry's in Beckenham a bit in my youth and would quite often walk back to Downham through Beckenham Place Park and Golf Course (Once had a bunk up on the 6th green but that's another story) anyway once when walking through we noticed they'd left the buggy gate unlocked and there was a key left in one so me and a mate drove it home. Was quite fun driving a Golf Buggy up Downham way at about 3am, we certainly got some strange looks from the night buses!

RedArmySE7

I'll also never forget a few mates nicking 3 bar stools from the Tigers Head in Bellingham then sitting on them all the way home on the night bus!

paulbaconsarnie

a life-size cardboard cut-out of graham gooch from our cricket team's annual piss up to the lords test match.

'goochie' was an everpresent at our 2nd XI matches (home and away) for about 3 seasons during the mid 80's, until he suffered a broken neck when someone decided that goochie needed some air, and poked his head out of the car window whilst returning from playing swanscombe and greenhithe.

RIP 'goochie'

ads

concrete eagles kicked off the pillars of someones drive, weighed a ton getting those 2 home

Romford_Addick

It's not a trophy, but a friend and I took someones washing off their line and pegged it on to a different one 3 doors away.

Penfolds Perm

I was in The Alma in Plumstead one night back in the early 80s when I came out to my Capri Mk 1 ( Red,Gold wheels,fibreglass facelift on bonnet ) Class !!!. Some fooker had got underneath while I was in the pub and had gone to the trouble of unbolting and nicking the starter motor. Went back inside for a lock-in.

cfgs

Many cones etc, including an ice cream sign, also I have on occasion been known to move for sale signs off lawns to a house a road or two away.

About ten years ago we were on a fire shout at about three am and were nearly killed when two pissed up teenagers decided to nick a double decker from the local depot. Luckily for us they missed us and got stuck through a hedge, unluckily for them the two ex squaddies on board ran them down and "restrained" them until the old bill finally arrived

MrOneLung

Got a few:

Large clock from The Plough in Dartford.

A 6 foot black and yellow car park barrier.

A tractor from a field in Wilmington on a drunken walk home from Deja Vu in Swanley back to Dartford.

Didnt steal it, but we picked up one of them small blue disability cars and 'parked' it on another street around the corner (felt guilty about this one!!!)

Finally, our friend was in the Royal Naval Reserves and he invited a few of us to a do at their Tower Bridge headquarters where they were also entertaining their Belgian counterparts.
During the night, we took a liking to the Belgians equivalent of the royal ensign - a big flag draped over something.
There was an admiral or commander who was giving a welcoming speech and whilst that was going on, one of us slipped out and stashed the flag in the toilets to take later. Meanwhile as the night went on we noticed the admiral/commander had hung his hat up on a coat peg. As the night was drawing to an end, my mate retrieved the flag and put it up his shirt and we started to walk out. Just then a group of naval reserves spotted us, and started chasing us to get the flag back. As we went past the coat pegs I also grabbed the admirals hat, put it on and started running. we managed to flag down a cab and make our escape just before they reached us. The next day our mate was not happy and said he had orders to 'retrieve the admirals cap and the Belgians flag before sunset' we made him sweat a bit by saying we had dumped them, before reluctantly having to hand them back.

JT

The letters of the 'Bell Pub' . Mate slept with the giant E.

Henry Irving

Not when drunk but much of the fittings and decorations from the Blitz club ended up in a squat in Hackney.

Carrying large cut outs of Marilyn Monroe and Jean Harlow on the tube during the rush hours gets you some funny looks.

ValleyGary

Talking of cut outs, i nicked a life size Sven Goran Erikson out of Sainsburys during 06 WC. Took him to 'The Rat & Parrot' for the games.