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Football player names, that always make you say something, "in your own head"

I'll start.

Wellbeck = well shit

Mata = What's the matter
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Comments

  • Pardew - C*nt
  • Altidore = My god he's shit

    Becks = Wish i was you

    Lescott = Wonder who cuts his hair
  • I'll start.

    Wellbeck = well shit

    image

  • Kermorgant... Whatever I'm thinking about his performance I have to say in a French accent
  • Eddie Firmani - God
  • Pardew - C*nt

    Me too & I knew that was "coming". It was just a question of which player first :-)
  • When Andy Thorn played and his name was mentioned, I would always sing 'Thorn in my side' in my head.
  • Alan Buckley

    Always in a mind mantra 'F*** me Buckley'
  • Marlon Harewood = Melon Headwood
  • edited January 2014
    This is getting out of control. I need treatment!

    However for Bob Hatton

    'The Sun Has Got It's Hatton' obviously (to me).

    Hatton by the way was a deadly goalscorer who always got one against us!
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  • Morgan and Megan Fox. Lee and Lily Tomlin.
  • I'm pleased it's not just me.
  • Walcott = injured
  • Not one that's been heard lately but whenever Izale McLeod was mentioned I always though well shizzle me izzle.
  • Jimmy Floyd Hasselwank
  • Sadly whenever we sing Chrissy Powell's Red Army, I hear Chrissy Powell's Salami
  • edited January 2014
    Damien Duff - Mmmm Beeeeer...

    Also, whenever I hear the name "Marlon" I always think of it being shouted in a high falsetto voice, thanks to one occasion at The Valley when Riscardo was sat behind me shouting it out in that fashion every time Marlon Beresford touched the ball. Thanks Rick...
  • Damien duff. I think preggers
  • Jason Lee = pineapple. Genuinely - when you think of him I bet that's the first word that springs to mind!
  • Help!

    Schmeichel Schmeichel
    Fol der riddle ikele.
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  • Michu - bless you
  • Sadly whenever we sing Chrissy Powell's Red Army, I hear Chrissy Powell's Salami

    When I took to him his first football match, an old school friend of mine genuinely thought we were singing 'Peperami' and not 'Red Army.' Naturally I let him believe that and tell everyone at school the next day what Charlton fans were singing.
  • Whenever a commentator says the name "Simpson", usually in connection with Danny Simpson, I always find myself repeating it in the style of Monty Burns.
  • (Stuart) Ripley - believe it or not

  • Sadly whenever we sing Chrissy Powell's Red Army, I hear Chrissy Powell's Salami

    When I took to him his first football match, an old school friend of mine genuinely thought we were singing 'Peperami' and not 'Red Army.' Naturally I let him believe that and tell everyone at school the next day what Charlton fans were singing.

    oooooh .. you are SOOOOO cruel .. ((:>)
  • Rooney. Always plays in my head as ROOOOONEEEEEEEEEE....
  • Sadly whenever we sing Chrissy Powell's Red Army, I hear Chrissy Powell's Salami

    When I took to him his first football match, an old school friend of mine genuinely thought we were singing 'Peperami' and not 'Red Army.' Naturally I let him believe that and tell everyone at school the next day what Charlton fans were singing.

    oooooh .. you are SOOOOO cruel .. ((:>)
    Ah, he's a Spurs fan so it's fine!
  • Broadway Danny Rose

    what a "zoltan gera" (i.e what a result)

    nice guy Dzeko (said in a Russian accent) cos he seems like a nice guy.

    I am ZLATON IBRHIMOVICH (said in an Schwarzenegger accent) which describes his own self worth/title of his book though he's actually a bit shit imo.

  • edited January 2014

    Broadway Danny Rose

    what a "zoltan gera" (i.e what a result)

    nice guy Dzeko (said in a Russian accent) cos he seems like a nice guy.

    I am ZLATON IBRHIMOVICH (said in an Schwarzenegger accent) which describes his own self worth/title of his book though he's actually a bit shit imo.

    So shit he has won league titles at every club he has been at, has an incredible scoring record and some of the goals he scores are just pathetically good.
    I also think that his transfer fees add up to be the highest ever spent on one player, if he was a bit shit I don't think teams would continue to spend big money on him.
    But football is all about opinions..
  • Jay Jay Okocha... so good they named him twice. :-)
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