Semi seriously said 'partners' on the things you shouldn't compromise about thread, but seriously, why do people persist in a clear toxic relationship?
Just had the delights in sharing a train home with a couple mid mega row. They will never ever be happy, they can't the way they spoke, looked at each other.
Is it fear of being single / the unknown? Why do people stay in such relationships? Anyone been in a relationship that's gone more south than Antarctica?
Baffled of Belvedere
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She consumes so much of our money, makes us travel to such hellholes as Huddersfield and Rotherham, and mostly provides misery and worry.
Still, we keep coming back.
Knew it wasn't right but can't explain why I didn't get out earlier. Probably a combination of fear of being single and wanting it to work (I genuinly thought I loved her)
The positive from it was that when I met my future wife, she had been in a shitty relationship too so not only did we know what we did want, we more importantly knew what we didn't want from a relationship.
I would like think I have learnt my lesson, in comparison to many bad relationships it was pretty short, but the last 6 months or so were hell. I don't really have any regrets, I think it made me better as a person and more confident to go with my gut feelings, and how to recognise the signs that you shouldn't be with someone.
I don't know how some people stay in these relationships long-term, I think I'd lose my marbles. But with kids etc. comes responsibility.
Spent so much longer in it than I should have and don't really know what the reason was, possibly because I was afraid of upsetting her regardless of my own feelings etc
Never pre judge what goes on behind other doors
Me and the wife pre kids had some shockers but we are more in love now than ever *
*soppy bastard
"It's a thin line between love and hate"
I've been married for 14 years, together for 16. We split for 2 years and were halfway through divorce before reconciling. During the split I had a few flings with women - only one of which meant anything (and she was insane, so it doesn't count!). What they taught me is that if you're with someone for a long time, then there has to be something in the relationship worth fighting for. The idea of 'Love' is a romantic concept, but one that is doomed to fail. Long, lasting relationships are built on companionship, understanding, empathy, friendship and a genuine enjoyment of the other person's company.
I often look at people who stay in horrid relationships and wonder why they bother. However, over time I've come to accept that my view of a relationship is just a snapshot of it. When I was a kid, we did nothing but argue in my house. My mum is extremely volatile and my brother was an absolute twat growing up. This is what has made me the argumentative sod that I am now - but when I'm with my wife, we don't argue. I avoid confrontation with her because I don't want to argue and row in every facet of my life. Maybe that's why I'm never judgemental of other peoples' relationships.
Love my gf but when we are having misunderstandings or a row she can get me crazy furious, the kind of fury that makes you hurt your hands because you smashed through the door out of frustration. Never hit her though, she has but she really hits like a girl and thats so funny that i cant even be mad at her. Would just love to find a way to disagree about things and finding a more zen way of dealing with it. Come from a long line of broken homes and i cant stand shouting and arguing, cant see the need to lose your head over trivial things but she ... disagrees
I was with my second wife for 4 years, married after two years, once the sex (which was amazing!) tails off and you realise what you are left with it can go wrong. In my case, I was left with a total fruitcake who like the first wife fleeced me for everything she could. If it hadn't been for those two, I would have been a very rich man!
In saying that though, I took the plunge for a third time and have been happily married for 26 years, but even that had its problems in the early days, but we worked through them. I may be a lot poorer, but at least I'm happy!