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Olympic Innuendo

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  • Adam Peaty's perfect semi in breast stroke
  • My wife and I have an Olympic sex life....


    ....once every four years.


    So do we. She moans because I keep coming first.
  • The entire commentary of the the horse mincing sport thing just now.

    One highlight.

    She can just relax now and ride him
  • All around the hole.
    Followed by that was still gathering speed as it hit the back of the hole.
    Golf as if you didn't know.
  • 'We have the best breast-stroker in the world'.
  • IA said:

    The entire commentary of the the horse mincing sport thing just now.

    One highlight.

    She can just relax now and ride him

    LOL, the best bit is, everyone knows exactly what you mean!!
  • Last night, talking about Max Whitlock in the gymnastics, something along the lines of "He was very quick to get it up".
  • Uboat said:

    'We have the best breast-stroker in the world'.

    How do they know? I'm not even in Rio.
  • IA said:

    The entire commentary of the the horse mincing sport thing just now.

    One highlight.

    She can just relax now and ride him

    LOL, the best bit is, everyone knows exactly what you mean!!
    Just realised that could have been read another way. I mean the sport whatever it's called where the horse minces around the place, not any sport involving minced horsemeat.
  • Female commentator at the weightlifting last night:

    "I used to prefer the snatch "
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  • "Many of these big boys are so agile, they are so quick and powerful in the snatch"
  • Adrian Chiles interviewing young female rower who hopes to compete at the 2020 Olympics. He ended with something like "Laura, look forward to meeting you in 4 years' time and touching your gold".
  • Heather Stanning stroking the coxless pair.

    Surely that's actually quite difficult, due to them being...?
    Admittedly she had an oarsome handful at the time.
  • dizzee said:

    Neymar comes inside

    This is a true story and similar. I was at Gatwick Airport on the bus to the Long Term Car Park. The bus was almost full but I spotted a young lady who was occupying the aisle seat with a spare at the window. She had a bag on her lap and that were cases everywhere on the full bus. Seeing me look to get to the spare seat next to her at the window, she said "Would you like to come inside me?" And, then, a brief pause and "Oh my God, what have I said?" Many smirking faces were seen.
    So what happened next?
    A pregnant pause - obviously.
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