Man "knocked out [...] for putting his feet on the seats" on a train
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I farted on the seat on the dlr today. Someone will have unwittingly been wallowing in my poo particles.2
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I always remember the time years ago I had my knees up against the seat of a bus. Now, I wouldn't have my knees up against any seat that's occupied, obviously. But this seat wasn't. There was a man in the seat next to it, though, and he took fairly profane exception. So I put my knees down, noting however (in calm, reasonable tones) that he hadn't actually been in that seat. Cue a baffling and slightly scary torrent of verbal abuse, threats, character assassinations and other shit that no apology could abate. It became a show for the entire bus, a show of hardness and rage. I AM MAN! HEAR ME ROAR!
I always remember that man, and wonder what about his life made him so angry, so exhibitionist in his anger. Because it surely wasn't someone having their knees up against the seat next to his on a bus.1 -
You farted on the DLR? I'm sorry, I was wrong, that deserves a punch at least.SuedeAdidas said:I farted on the seat on the dlr today. Someone will have unwittingly been wallowing in my poo particles.
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Yup. Was a goodun n'all.Wheresmeticket? said:
You farted on the DLR? I'm sorry, I was wrong, that deserves a punch at least.SuedeAdidas said:I farted on the seat on the dlr today. Someone will have unwittingly been wallowing in my poo particles.
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I'm sorry, my mum had just phoned me in the pub and told me I had to come home.Leuth said:I always remember the time years ago I had my knees up against the seat of a bus. Now, I wouldn't have my knees up against any seat that's occupied, obviously. But this seat wasn't. There was a man in the seat next to it, though, and he took fairly profane exception. So I put my knees down, noting however (in calm, reasonable tones) that he hadn't actually been in that seat. Cue a baffling and slightly scary torrent of verbal abuse, threats, character assassinations and other shit that no apology could abate. It became a show for the entire bus, a show of hardness and rage. I AM MAN! HEAR ME ROAR!
I always remember that man, and wonder what about his life made him so angry, so exhibitionist in his anger. Because it surely wasn't someone having their knees up against the seat next to his on a bus.8 -
I liked the story I read somewhere about the guy asking someone to put their headphones in rather than playing their music aloud to all on the train (or bus). They wouldn't.. so he started to read his book aloud page by page until they stopped.
And another sitting on a bloke's bag because he refused to move it to let someone sit down.
I got a bit a abuse last week on the bus as I asked a guy if his bag was nice and comfy on its own seat as I trudged past him to squish in a seat at the back. He weren't happy, he was shouting back at me the whole way down the hill... I need to rein it in a bit as I might get a wallop soon as im always moaning at my beautiful fellow commuters.
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Oh yeah, having a bag on a seat when the train's full is a capital offence, give you that0
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for gawds sake don't get the 244 or 380 from Woolwich to Thamesmead. There's going to be a murder before long..Curb_It said:I liked the story I read somewhere about the guy asking someone to put their headphones in rather than playing their music aloud to all on the train (or bus). They wouldn't.. so he started to read his book aloud page by page until they stopped.
And another sitting on a bloke's bag because he refused to move it to let someone sit down.
I got a bit a abuse last week on the bus as I asked a guy if his bag was nice and comfy on its own seat as I trudged past him to squish in a seat at the back. He weren't happy, he was shouting back at me the whole way down the hill... I need to rein it in a bit as I might get a wallop soon as im always moaning at my beautiful fellow commuters.0 -
Christ that 244 is hell on earth at times.0
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You, probablyLeuth said:I always remember the time years ago I had my knees up against the seat of a bus. Now, I wouldn't have my knees up against any seat that's occupied, obviously. But this seat wasn't. There was a man in the seat next to it, though, and he took fairly profane exception. So I put my knees down, noting however (in calm, reasonable tones) that he hadn't actually been in that seat. Cue a baffling and slightly scary torrent of verbal abuse, threats, character assassinations and other shit that no apology could abate. It became a show for the entire bus, a show of hardness and rage. I AM MAN! HEAR ME ROAR!
I always remember that man, and wonder what about his life made him so angry, so exhibitionist in his anger. Because it surely wasn't someone having their knees up against the seat next to his on a bus.24 - Sponsored links:
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It's going some if it beats the 261 from Lewisham to Bromley in the evening.Curb_It said:Christ that 244 is hell on earth at times.
Reeks of weed and kids scoffing Moreley's chicken.0 -
Exactly. Left wing, right wing. Remainer or not. You just don't fuck with trains.Addickted2TheReds said:I know you find it fun to have a different view to the majority, but trying to argue that it's not wrong to put your feet on train seats is taking it a bit far.
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Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train0 -
Why can you not sit in a seat upright with your feet on the floor?Leuth said:Ooh, you're all so hard!
Microscopic amounts of street detritus on your kecks - no more really than you'd pick up by other means - versus being 'sorted out', punched, possibly permanently injured. Who knew that crime (assault) had so many advocates on CL?
I personally avoid stepping in shit. And if I had stepped in it, or if my shoes were muddy, then I wouldn't put them on the seats, would I? Everything else is trace amounts and can be disregarded. You're not going to catch toxocariasis on the 18.07 out of Cannon Street because someone had their feet on your seat on the way in.
I'd like to see a Mythbusters-style forensic analysis of two seats, one of which had passengers sit on it and one of which had a combination of bums and feet. I bet there wouldn't be much difference, microbially speaking.
The real issue here, if there is one, is people who let their dogs shit in the road and don't clean it up. They're the real enemy. Focus your violent fantasies on them.
Would it be acceptable for visitor to your home to park their feet on your furniture?5 -
You try the words "sorry mate"; people appreciate that.Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train2 -
Yeah, I probably did say 'sorry' at first. I know my ps and qs.Plumstead_Micky said:
You try the words "sorry mate"; people appreciate that.Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train1 -
Fair enough.Leuth said:
Yeah, I probably did say 'sorry' at first. I know my ps and qs.Plumstead_Micky said:
You try the words "sorry mate"; people appreciate that.Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train0 -
Think of it from the seat's perspective.
Would you rather someone's feet in your face, or someone's arse?10 -
Ok, my mind has been changed... next time some twat in a suit thinks his suitcase deserves a seat more than my il just punch him on the beak1
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And the person before you? :-)SuedeAdidas said:
Yup. Was a goodun n'all.Wheresmeticket? said:
You farted on the DLR? I'm sorry, I was wrong, that deserves a punch at least.SuedeAdidas said:I farted on the seat on the dlr today. Someone will have unwittingly been wallowing in my poo particles.
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charltonkeston said:
Why can you not sit in a seat upright with your feet on the floor?Leuth said:Ooh, you're all so hard!
Microscopic amounts of street detritus on your kecks - no more really than you'd pick up by other means - versus being 'sorted out', punched, possibly permanently injured. Who knew that crime (assault) had so many advocates on CL?
I personally avoid stepping in shit. And if I had stepped in it, or if my shoes were muddy, then I wouldn't put them on the seats, would I? Everything else is trace amounts and can be disregarded. You're not going to catch toxocariasis on the 18.07 out of Cannon Street because someone had their feet on your seat on the way in.
I'd like to see a Mythbusters-style forensic analysis of two seats, one of which had passengers sit on it and one of which had a combination of bums and feet. I bet there wouldn't be much difference, microbially speaking.
The real issue here, if there is one, is people who let their dogs shit in the road and don't clean it up. They're the real enemy. Focus your violent fantasies on them.
Would it be acceptable for visitor to your home to park their feet on your furniture?
Yes it would, please get as cosy as you like at my gaff
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Putting your feet on the seats aboard The Flying Scotman in 1953 was a hanging offence.
It probably still is1 -
Haha. Dunno mate.man_at_milletts said:
And the person before you? :-)SuedeAdidas said:
Yup. Was a goodun n'all.Wheresmeticket? said:
You farted on the DLR? I'm sorry, I was wrong, that deserves a punch at least.SuedeAdidas said:I farted on the seat on the dlr today. Someone will have unwittingly been wallowing in my poo particles.
A bit of fart gas never hurt anyone eh?0 -
Maybe, just maybe, its you, just a hunch.....!Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train3 -
Well he does seem to have had more than his fair share of people angry with him/her.Greenie said:
Maybe, just maybe, it you, just a hunch.....!Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train
leuth must surely come across differently when travelling on public transport as I have never known him deliberately piss people off on here.18 -
PC gone mad. You should have done what so many of the posters here would have done and felled him with a single blow to the jaw, after which explaining that you only use your power for good.Leuth said:
Yeah, I probably did say 'sorry' at first. I know my ps and qs.Plumstead_Micky said:
You try the words "sorry mate"; people appreciate that.Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train5 -
Where do we stand on feet on train seat, shoes off?
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Any more transport based yarns Leuth?
It's Thursday afternoon, I have dismissed the kids early and I have no marking to do!3 -
..and socks and trousers if you are going to stand on the seat, twirling them above your head shouting "we'll be OKAY!".Uboat said:Where do we stand on feet on train seat, shoes off?
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Every time I see his posts I am more and more convinced he/she is a troll, either that or very {...} uniqueTellyTubby said:
Well he does seem to have had more than his fair share of people angry with him/her.Greenie said:
Maybe, just maybe, it you, just a hunch.....!Leuth said:Another story. The closest I've come to incurring GBH on public transport was on a train to Bristol, again many years ago. I was moving down a packed train with no seats available, and happened to lightly brush past the wrong guy. He lost it, effing and blinding for no reason other than to assert his manhood. Except I didn't just take it, but without turning round I calmly suggested something along the lines of "...and you have an anger problem, you c**t".
"WHAT DID YOU SAY???"
It was only the hilariously stereotypical "leave it he's not worth it" of his spouse that saved me from having a bulging-veined oaf stumbling after me on a crowded intercity train
leuth must surely come across differently when travelling on public transport as I have never known him deliberately piss people off on here.0
