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Taking the P**S

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  • Who pees in the sea? Apparently just about everyone I know has done it while I think it's disgusting

    If you've ever been in a wetsuit surfing or similar in the UK you'll pee in your suit just to keep warm!
    My first wife worked in forensic science. She came home and told me about a case once. Some bloke had died from asphyxiation in some form of sex game that had gone horribly wrong. At the time he was wearing two wetsuits. There was a tube attached to his cock which went through a hole in the first suit and into the layers between the suits. As part of the "fun" he pissed into the suits and enjoyed the nice warm feeling.....
  • Nothing better than taking a bus to the pool with your feet up on the seats whilst busting for a piss then letting it out in the shallow end.

    and snacking on nuts you smuggled out of the local pub along the way.
  • edited March 2017
    To be honest, I quite like it. It makes it warmer and almost more rustic. A bit like how I prefer Serie A to the Prem as it isn't glitzy glam.
  • Always done it meself, can't see what the issue is
  • .....man up snowflakes
  • seth plum said:

    I can honestly say I have never done it. We were told, as children, that if you piddled, the water would turn purple around you due to a special dye. That was enough to stop me.

    Apparently they had to stop that as the old ladies were leaving little purple trails as they swam.
  • edited March 2017
    I swim 4, 5 times a week, here are my top tips.

    Shower before the swim, it helps to keep the pool clean and has the benefit of providing some protection from the Chlorine to hair and skin (sadly, too late for me as regards hair).

    When showering afterwards there are very few products that remove Chlorine. I searched high and low and eventually found an affordable one by Boots called ‘Sun, Swim and Gym.’ (It states on the container that it removes Chlorine). I suffered at one time from a highly irritating itching on torso and arms which I eventually put down to Chlorine burn. It has stopped since I started to use this product.

    Oh and finally ... Don’t piss in the pool!
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  • It's the floaters I'm worried about.
  • It is disgusting. I'm not swimming in that stuff. I'll go to the pub instead. The local has nice bowls of complimentary peanuts at the bar.

    I assume you saw the analysis of complimentary nuts etc, on the bar of pubs, the amount of faeces and urine on them, how anyone can go to the toilet in a pub and not wash their hands and then help themselves to nuts etc knowing how clean their hands are, I do not know
  • Always done it meself, can't see what the issue is

    ..apart from the fact that I should never have done it off the diving board, BUT I'VE ALREADY APOLOGISED FOR THAT!
  • In the bath yes, public swimming pool I try not to. My missus once peed on me in a swimming pool but that's a whole other story.
  • Redskin said:

    Anyone overly concerned with the thought of a bit of pee in the pool should remind themselves of how many times they've performed cunnilingus over the years. And the other one.

    What? In the swimming pool, never...
    Surely it would be outlawed under 'No Heavy Petting'?
  • During a visit to Mykonos a few years ago, I concluded that what might be in the ocean couldn't possibly be as bad as what might be on the beach.
  • All that extra salt in the pool helps us to float. I'm all for it.
  • edited March 2017
    Halix said:

    seth plum said:

    I can honestly say I have never done it. We were told, as children, that if you piddled, the water would turn purple around you due to a special dye. That was enough to stop me.

    Oddly enough my piss is purple already, I wonder what colour the special dye will turn it, I'm just nipping down to the Lido to find out.
    Just got back home, (it was freezing) - I am able to confirm - Florescent Green!
  • 1StevieG said:

    It's the floaters I'm worried about.

    I tend to find dead old people are quite easy to brush out the way when I'm doing breast stroke. But yes, I take your point - if I'm doing front crawl it's a right pain.
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  • Does vinegar sting? I haven't gone for weeks and filling up fast, even me ears are leaking.
  • In the bath yes, public swimming pool I try not to. My missus once peed on me in a swimming pool but that's a whole other story.

    Thanks Donald
  • JiMMy 85 said:

    1StevieG said:

    It's the floaters I'm worried about.

    I tend to find dead old people are quite easy to brush out the way when I'm doing breast stroke. But yes, I take your point - if I'm doing front crawl it's a right pain.
    Avoid Thursdays, old dead people get in for half price.
  • Curb_It said:

    I remember when I was a young girl and swam competively for a local club and was recovering from fairly serious back surgery at the time... anyway part of my recuperation was to get back in for light training with the squad.

    During my dawdling I spotted a large brown wotsit in the pool. I was horrified. I got out and told the coach. He told me to keep quiet and handed me a lane number and told me to remove the offending article with that. Being about 11 I didn't tell him to poke it and off I went.

    Try as hard as I could I just couldn't get it to roll onto to the plate and stay there and when it rolled towards me I started screeching. Unfortunately all the other swimmers heard me and the turd alert went up! All the swimmers left the pool and I got told off!

    Scarred for life on that... Erith baths too.

    I really probably shouldn't have shared this. But swim training was swim training and it was taken seriously.



    Where did the turd come in the next race?
  • Pissing on the pool was almost compulsory when I was a kid and had school swimming sessions! The girls were worse than the boys!
  • 1StevieG said:

    It's the floaters I'm worried about.

    Was taken to Elephant & Castle pools as a kid with my sister and some friends as that pool had a wave machine. We were having great fun when it started, but on one occasion the screams when the waves got going weren't ones of joy, but because someone had shat in the water and kids were desperately trying to avoid the floaters. It was like someone had released Jaws into the pool!

    (guilty of topping up the water level on the odd occasion as a kid)
  • I always wondered what unit of measurement was used for piss, now I now.
  • Curb_It said:

    I remember when I was a young girl and swam competively for a local club and was recovering from fairly serious back surgery at the time... anyway part of my recuperation was to get back in for light training with the squad.

    During my dawdling I spotted a large brown wotsit in the pool. I was horrified. I got out and told the coach. He told me to keep quiet and handed me a lane number and told me to remove the offending article with that. Being about 11 I didn't tell him to poke it and off I went.

    Try as hard as I could I just couldn't get it to roll onto to the plate and stay there and when it rolled towards me I started screeching. Unfortunately all the other swimmers heard me and the turd alert went up! All the swimmers left the pool and I got told off!

    Scarred for life on that... Erith baths too.

    I really probably shouldn't have shared this. But swim training was swim training and it was taken seriously.



    Where did the turd come in the next race?
    Presumably between second and fourth.
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