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Appalling and sweeping generalisation alert!!

Halix
Halix Posts: 2,237
edited April 2018 in Not Sports Related
After careful consideration and a dreadful journey, I have concluded that there are three categories for appalling drivers, far worse than your sterotypical white van man or teenage yobo:-

1/- Useless and unaware (two telltale signs, wearing a hat in the car and/or driving with sunvisor down on a non sunny day). Often has stickers in rear window about cats, National Trust and slowing down for horses.
2/- Agressive, tailgating and inconsiderate (Usually driving BMW, Merc (typically Silver),and especially Audis) particularly adept at cutting across lanes to use exit sliproad at last minute.
3/- Skip Lorries.

Im sorry it had to be said.
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Comments

  • addick05
    addick05 Posts: 2,348
    Not going to argue with that - and there are people STILL using mobile phones when behind a wheel!
  • killerandflash
    killerandflash Posts: 69,846
    Can I add Toyota Priuses with TfL stickers on them (often Ubers) parking on double yellows with their hazards on...
  • Stig
    Stig Posts: 29,023
    A new broom sweeps clean.
  • bobmunro
    bobmunro Posts: 20,843
    I drive a German skip lorry, and I love horses.

    Do you want some?? ;-)
  • Silver Mercedes drivers are a category to themselves
  • Missed It
    Missed It Posts: 2,733
    As an Audi owner that drives a bit like an old lady these days, I would say I am the one exception that proves the rule as far as twatbastard flash German car drivers goes.
  • Halix
    Halix Posts: 2,237
    bobmunro said:

    I drive a German skip lorry, and I love horses.

    Do you want some?? ;-)

    If you drive a skip lorry you have probably already given my car some!
  • Halix
    Halix Posts: 2,237
    edited April 2018

    Can I add Toyota Priuses with TfL stickers on them (often Ubers) parking on double yellows with their hazards on...

    Categary 2 but smug with it, because they are saving the planet.
  • colthe3rd
    colthe3rd Posts: 8,486
    Category for black cab drivers as well.
  • Halix
    Halix Posts: 2,237

    Silver Mercedes drivers are a category to themselves

    Agreed amended accordingly.
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  • Algarveaddick
    Algarveaddick Posts: 21,153
    Missed It said:

    As an Audi owner that drives a bit like an old lady these days, I would say I am the one exception that proves the rule as far as twatbastard flash German car drivers goes.

    Then buy a fucking hat ...
  • Halix
    Halix Posts: 2,237
    Halix said:

    After careful consideration and a dreadful journey, I have concluded that there are three categories for appalling drivers, far worse than your sterotypical white van man or teenage yobo:-

    1/- Useless and unaware (two telltale signs, wearing a hat in the car and/or driving with sunvisor down on a non sunny day). Often has stickers in rear window about cats, National Trust and slowing down for horses.
    2/- Agressive, tailgating and inconsiderate (Usually driving BMW, Merc (typically Silver),and especially Audis) particularly adept at cutting across lanes to use exit sliproad at last minute.
    3/- Skip Lorries.

    Im sorry it had to be said.

    4/- Sorry, one I realised that I missed. Incapable drivers of 4x4 or people carriers, (often driven by a soccer mom, with one child seat, who cannot pass other cars when they drive down a lane or narrow road).
  • PaddyP17
    PaddyP17 Posts: 13,035
    colthe3rd said:

    Category for black cab drivers as well.

    I fucking HATE hackney carriages. They're unbelievably entitled and aggressive. I once crossed a road not at a crossing, but where there was a massive buildup behind a red light. The cabbie I attempted to cross in front of had left a yard between him and the car in front, but on seeing me crossing, moved forward so I couldn't get past. He then unleashed some choice swear words. Might have had a racial edge to it, but I don't know - there have been too many occasions where cabbies have told me to fuck off back to my own country, or asked my mates to do the same, or otherwise complain about "the foreigners".
  • bobmunro
    bobmunro Posts: 20,843
    Halix said:

    Halix said:

    After careful consideration and a dreadful journey, I have concluded that there are three categories for appalling drivers, far worse than your sterotypical white van man or teenage yobo:-

    1/- Useless and unaware (two telltale signs, wearing a hat in the car and/or driving with sunvisor down on a non sunny day). Often has stickers in rear window about cats, National Trust and slowing down for horses.
    2/- Agressive, tailgating and inconsiderate (Usually driving BMW, Merc (typically Silver),and especially Audis) particularly adept at cutting across lanes to use exit sliproad at last minute.
    3/- Skip Lorries.

    Im sorry it had to be said.

    4/- Sorry, one I realised that I missed. Incapable drivers of 4x4 or people carriers, (often driven by a soccer mom, with one child seat, who cannot pass other cars when they drive down a lane or narrow road).
    Now you're getting personal (I drive a BMW 4x4) and I am totally capable of driving it, just as long as everything gets out of my way.
  • Valiantphil
    Valiantphil Posts: 6,410
    For category one, you need to add:
    Rear wiper working when it is not raining.
  • Greenie
    Greenie Posts: 9,172
    I pay my road tax*...ergo I own the road.

    I also ride a motorbike, a bloody great big one, I assume ALL car drivers are myopic, I have to believe it and am seldom proved wrong.

    May I also add middle plane hoggers, Ive got a mate and as soon as he gets on the motorway hits the middle lane and trundles along at between 60-65 oblivious to the tailback behind him.
    I was in his motor and pointed it out to him, 'fuck 'em' was his reply!!

    *Cue bellend who will say theres no such thing as road tax.
  • bobmunro
    bobmunro Posts: 20,843

    For category one, you need to add:
    Rear wiper working when it is not raining.

    ... and fog lights on in bright sunlight.
  • Stig
    Stig Posts: 29,023
    bobmunro said:

    I drive a German skip lorry, and I love horses.

    Do you want some?? ;-)

    Does he want what - a skip full of horse shit?
  • Those that sit in the middle lane of the motorway with nothing in front of them and no one on the inside lane drive me bonkers. Especially when I am stuck behind them with a line of cars flashing past in the outside lane.
  • RedChaser
    RedChaser Posts: 19,885
    colthe3rd said:

    Category for black cab drivers as well.

    image
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  • bobmunro
    bobmunro Posts: 20,843

    Those that sit in the middle lane of the motorway with nothing in front of them and no one on the inside lane drive me bonkers. Especially when I am stuck behind them with a line of cars flashing past in the outside lane.

    No, no - when you drive a big 4x4 you need the space either side that the middle lane affords you.
  • iamdan
    iamdan Posts: 2,421
    I own a 3series, yes I am a selfish bastard.
  • SE7toSG3
    SE7toSG3 Posts: 3,140
    Nissan Micra's, 4 or 5 occupants, centre lane regardless of anything else.
  • blackpool72
    blackpool72 Posts: 23,673
    A category for drivers who cannot park properly in supermarket car parks.
    The lines are clearly painted so you can park between them not on them.
    Wa#%#$RSVP.
  • Talal
    Talal Posts: 11,485
    Signals in general. It's either the lack of them or incorrect usage (saw someone do a turn in the road with hazards on the other day).
    Then you get bus drivers and mopeds, usually takeaway drivers, who often fail to cancel them for a considerable time.
  • soapy_jones
    soapy_jones Posts: 21,352
    Greenie said:

    I pay my road tax*...ergo I own the road.

    I also ride a motorbike, a bloody great big one, I assume ALL car drivers are myopic, I have to believe it and am seldom proved wrong.

    May I also add middle plane hoggers, Ive got a mate and as soon as he gets on the motorway hits the middle lane and trundles along at between 60-65 oblivious to the tailback behind him.
    I was in his motor and pointed it out to him, 'fuck 'em' was his reply!!

    *Cue bellend who will say theres no such thing as road tax.

    Those that sit in the middle lane of the motorway with nothing in front of them and no one on the inside lane drive me bonkers. Especially when I am stuck behind them with a line of cars flashing past in the outside lane.

    THIS BIGTIME
  • Those that sit in the middle lane of the motorway with nothing in front of them and no one on the inside lane drive me bonkers. Especially when I am stuck behind them with a line of cars flashing past in the outside lane.

    Cars should be fitted with a device at the front of the vehicle

    If someone is driving in the middle for no reason in front of you, the device automatically reaches out and flips their vehicle into the side of the road and out of everyone's way!!
  • bobmunro
    bobmunro Posts: 20,843
    Greenie said:

    I pay my road tax*...ergo I own the road.

    I also ride a motorbike, a bloody great big one, I assume ALL car drivers are myopic, I have to believe it and am seldom proved wrong.

    May I also add middle plane hoggers, Ive got a mate and as soon as he gets on the motorway hits the middle lane and trundles along at between 60-65 oblivious to the tailback behind him.
    I was in his motor and pointed it out to him, 'fuck 'em' was his reply!!

    *Cue bellend who will say theres no such thing as road tax.

    There's no such thing as road tax.

    Doh...
  • soapy_jones
    soapy_jones Posts: 21,352
    edited April 2018
    Those yellow hatched no entry boxes at junctions that a surprisingly high percentage of the car driving population seem to ignore and thus block the flow of traffic.

    Now, show me the link to a petition I can sign to have six foot long spikes or "man traps" for the want of a better two words, to fire out of the road and skewer these retards and their vehicles after say, 2 minutes. Then we could all have the pleasure of watching their useless decomposing carcasses for weeks, this would also act as a deterrent to even the most selfish of twats out on the roads...