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Family Stand...

milesfromLondonmilesfromLondon
in General Charlton
I would appreciate your views on if you think I am over-reacting on this....

I have a season ticket in the Family Stand for myself and my 7 year-old son. On Saturday I also took my 5 year-old daughter to her first game.

Sat behind us were a group of 4 adults (no children). One of them, passionately supporting the team, kept having shouting outbursts so loud that it was making my daughter jump, and she told me she was scared. I didn't want to have a go at a bloke for shouting, but did feel within my rights in the Family Stand to ask him to tone it down a little as my little girl was scared.

He basically had a go at me saying that he hadn't sworn (which was not true) and that he was supporting the team, had sat there for four years and will continue to do so. We moved at half-time and received no apology at all from him. I did point out to him that there were empty seats in every part of the ground where he would be within his rights to shout as loud as he liked.

I have been going to home and away games for over 30 years and am as vociferous as he is when not with my kids, but that is the reason we use the family stand.

I suppose my question is; am I right to feel aggrieved with this situation? Is there any point having a Family Stand at all if a parent of a 5 year-old girl can't feel comfortable to ask someone to tone it down a bit?

Cheers.
«13

Comments

  • Justin20474Justin20474
    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

  • milesfromLondonmilesfromLondon
    Justin20474 said:

    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

    Thanks for that, I'll pass the apology on to my five year old girl shall I?
  • RedroboRedrobo
    So many empty seats in all stands, including the family stand so all are free to move.

    However, the family stand does in my opinion demand a higher standard of behaviour than you may expect in other areas. If you would be unhappy with your own 5yr old being upset with your behaviour you are probably wrong.

    That said, shouting, singing etc is part of being at a football game and so is the chanting that may not be politically correct. If you have children who are not happy in that environment then perhaps they are too young.

  • milesfromLondonmilesfromLondon
    Redrobo said:

    So many empty seats in all stands, including the family stand so all are free to move.

    However, the family stand does in my opinion demand a higher standard of behaviour than you may expect in other areas. If you would be unhappy with your own 5yr old being upset with your behaviour you are probably wrong.

    That said, shouting, singing etc is part of being at a football game and so is the chanting that may not be politically correct. If you have children who are not happy in that environment then perhaps they are too young.

    In fairness I was very polite in my challenge and said that I didn't want to affect his own experience. He did swear at one point which I let go, but it was when she told me she was scared that I felt I had to say something.

    She will not be going for a while now.
  • Covered EndCovered End
    The answer to the OP, is that I couldn't offer an opinion without having been there.
  • Justin20474Justin20474
    milesfromLondon said:

    Justin20474 said:

    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

    Thanks for that, I'll pass the apology on to my five year old girl shall I?
    You can tell her what you like but I don't apologise. Sitting in the family stand with my family and my friend's family supporting the team is nothing to apologise for.

    From where I was sitting your daughter looked like she was actually enjoying herself with her occasionally shouting "come on Charlton", which is great to see.
  • milesfromLondonmilesfromLondon
    Covered End said:

    The answer to the OP, is that I couldn't offer an opinion without having been there.

    Fair point, it was the reaction to my challenge which has pissed me off the most and Just-in has reinforced my view that it was lacking in any sense of empathy towards my kids.
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  • JoshrewCAFCJoshrewCAFC
    Charltonparklane said:

    JoshrewCAFC said:

    Justin20474 said:

    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

    If someone in the family stand is upset with your behaviour you should calm down, its the point in having the family stand surely?

    Nothing confines you to the family stand, you could move to somewhere else, although obviously this costs more. If you don't want to respect the atmosphere expected in the family stand then move elsewhere, IMO.

    Just because your children are okay with your shouting wont mean others are.
    That's silly mate.
    As long as its not swearing and overly aggressive then anything fair game.
    It's a football match.
    What do you think it was like for 5 year old when there was 27000 shouting and screaming against Palace.

    I can tell you for one my two loved it.
    Again, just because some people's children love it doesn't mean everyone else's will.

    If there is a 5yo girl leaving scared having sat in the family stand where else could they sit to avoid this?

    I started going when I was about 7 I think, and I was brought to the North Upper straight away with my family, I loved it. But if I hadn't I'm sure we'd have changed our season tickets to the family stand where you would expect it to be more calm.
  • milesfromLondonmilesfromLondon
    Charltonparklane said:

    JoshrewCAFC said:

    Justin20474 said:

    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

    If someone in the family stand is upset with your behaviour you should calm down, its the point in having the family stand surely?

    Nothing confines you to the family stand, you could move to somewhere else, although obviously this costs more. If you don't want to respect the atmosphere expected in the family stand then move elsewhere, IMO.

    Just because your children are okay with your shouting wont mean others are.
    That's silly mate.
    As long as its not swearing and overly aggressive then anything fair game.
    It's a football match.
    What do you think it was like for 5 year old when there was 27000 shouting and screaming against Palace.

    I can tell you for one my two loved it.
    But he was aggressive IMO and did shout "that was f***ing sh*t" at one stage which, as I said, I let go. To be honest it was more the reaction to the challenge which, I think I should feel comfortable to make in the Family Stand.
  • JoshrewCAFCJoshrewCAFC
    Just because your own children are happy with the way you behave doesn't make you father of the year and expect other kids to love your behaviour too.
  • eaststandmikeeaststandmike
    Covered End said:

    I don't think you should swear in the family stand tbf.

    This 100%, the stewards should throw out anyone caught or reported swearing in the family section.
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  • Justin20474Justin20474
    To be fair the only two people who can comment on this is myself and mfL. If, like mfL states, I did shout those words the I apologies for that single outburst. I am not an aggressive person and have never shown those traits, passion must not be confused with aggression.

    If the language is deemed to be offensive then we can quite clearly hear the north stand chanting from where we sit. It doesn't make it right but you would have to sit in a cupboard to not hear any shouting or choice language of any kind.
  • CharltonparklaneCharltonparklane
    milesfromLondon said:

    Charltonparklane said:

    JoshrewCAFC said:

    Justin20474 said:

    That person was me, I was there with my friend, my wife, his wife and our two son's who are all season ticket holders, if you bothered to look down the row you would have seen our family units

    Yes, I support the team and am not ashamed to do that, I am very very careful what I shout when I watch the game and never intentionally use bad language. Although we are in the family stand you can hear far worse than anything that I was saying from others in the stand.

    I will continue to support, get frustrated by, and continue to boo when things aren't good on the pitch and I will reiterate I am not offensive with anything I do.

    If someone in the family stand is upset with your behaviour you should calm down, its the point in having the family stand surely?

    Nothing confines you to the family stand, you could move to somewhere else, although obviously this costs more. If you don't want to respect the atmosphere expected in the family stand then move elsewhere, IMO.

    Just because your children are okay with your shouting wont mean others are.
    That's silly mate.
    As long as its not swearing and overly aggressive then anything fair game.
    It's a football match.
    What do you think it was like for 5 year old when there was 27000 shouting and screaming against Palace.

    I can tell you for one my two loved it.
    But he was aggressive IMO and did shout "that was f***ing sh*t" at one stage which, as I said, I let go. To be honest it was more the reaction to the challenge which, I think I should feel comfortable to make in the Family Stand.
    That's why I said as long it's not swearing and being aggressive.

    Didn't say he did or didn't as I wasn't there bud.

    When we were in prem I'd shout and swear in the family stand every game.
    I do shudder now at my behaviour back then.
  • Justin20474Justin20474
    That is not what I'm saying
  • Covered EndCovered End
    edited April 2018
    Game, set and match to mfL. Shake hands please gentlemen :wink:
  • clb74clb74
    Covered End said:

    Game,set and match to mfL. Shake hands please gentlemen :wink:

    Blokes sworn twice in a game hardly a hanging offence.
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