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50 reasons why Marcus Bent pulled out of the signing session

edited July 2007 in General Charlton
1. The club shop's VIP area wasn't big enough
2. Bartram's is out of Cristal
3. The receptionist disrespected him
4. He has an interview for the 'marry Jodie Marsh' programme
5. He can't be arsed
6. He thought is was meant to be Darren Bent
7. He'd double booked with some trollop he's pulled off myspace
8. He's having his surname tattoed on his right arm
9. He thought it was a singing session
10. He can't write

can we make it 20 reasons ??????


  • 11. Jerome Thomas ran off with his pen.
  • 12. the signing was in daylight hours, and the snappers from London Lite weren't present
  • edited July 2007
    13. Beth Ditto (Charlton fan) had enough of his arrogance and laziness so she sat on him. She gave the club a bell and said sorry Marcus can't come in today, his in a bit of a tight position.

    Receptionists tell's Pard's . His fuming.
  • edited July 2007
    14. He's got a haircut booked
  • [cite]Posted By: Bexleyheath_Red[/cite]13. Beth Ditto (Charlton fan) had enough of his arrogance and laziness so she sat on him.

    No true, you really should deal in facts and not listen to Gossip....
  • edited July 2007
    15. His gold tooth fell out and he wanted to get home and put it under his pillow for the Bling Fairy
    edited July 2007
    16. He is a lazy bellend.
  • edited July 2007
    17. he has the hump at the vicious rumours that teddy sherringham has already done a signing and 50 cent was gonna interrupt his signing and steal his limelight.
  • 18. He thought beforehand he'd have a quick read of Charlton Life to see what sort of reception he might get :-)
  • 19. He'd got his c*ck stuck in a Dyson accessory
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  • [quote][cite]Posted By: AFKA Bartram[/cite]19. He'd got his c*ck stuck in a Dyson accessory[/quote]

    No chance of that happening AFKA, Dyson accessories are way too big to get something so small stuck in it
    edited July 2007
    i just hope you are not talking from experiance dood ;-)
  • No comment lol
  • 20. he's got a new job as a lollipop man
  • 21. Hes entering the big brother house as a replacement for dimwit Brian, producers said no one will tell the difference
  • he's far too good for this league, shirley!?
  • edited July 2007
    22. He's at the hospital with Jerome and Danielle for the 12 week scan.
  • edited July 2007
    23. He pulled a groin muscle last night strutting his stuff in China Whites
  • edited July 2007
    24. He was worried MCS would change his attention to him
  • stick with 5,7 or 10
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  • 25. Having only noted down places where he has scored, Marcus failed to remember where the Valley was.....
  • 26. He decided to go by train, got travel advice off MCS, and ended up in Milton Keynes
  • **Yawn**

    27. I took him out with my harem and he had such a good time he stuck around the ladies toilets with me and them all day and night.
  • edited July 2007
    28. he was wandering up from charlton station aimlessly heading in the vague direction of the ground. Then he noticed Pards driving past, deciding to make a token effort he sprinted across charlton Church Lane before pulling up in the middle of the road clutching his hamstring.
  • edited July 2007
    29. He didn't want to miss Happy Hour at Sugar Reef.

    30. Now that the Valley is a No Smoking area, he couldn't face the thought of 20 minutes without a fag.
  • edited July 2007
    31. He'd dropped his pen on the way to the ground, but decided he wouldn't go back and get it because 'he don't do running back'
  • 32. Quiz buff Marcus couldn't resist staying in and watching 1992 re-run's of Going for Gold with Henry Kelly on UK Gold. The Dutch guy won.
  • 33. West Ham have made a £18m bid for him. "He's the sort of player I look for" said Curbishley. "He's hungry with something to prove, versatile, and his goal record speaks for itself. You don't play for 10 clubs in 9 seasons without having something a bit special about you."
  • edited July 2007
    34. The club shop refused to ensure the queue of people would file past within 18 inches of him, so he knew he'd just stand there gesticulating at his feet for a few hours and couldn't be arsed
  • 35. Suffering from claustrophobia, Marcus was worried about being crushed by the deluge of his biggest fans
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Roland Out Forever!