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Am I being selfish?
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Here's a thought: wouldn't it be a shame if she couldn't find her passport the day before she was due to travel? Okay, she may lose the cost of her holiday but that might be a small price to pay. He'll soon move on to his next target.0
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Should she trust him ? No, No, No No No No No No No No No ..... etc !0
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There you have it then. If he wants sunglasses he can't be wanting a move to London! Or he's a REAL crafty bastard and he's playing a blinder.0
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So far all he has asked for is sunglasses
Has he bought your mother anything ? --just looked at the pciture you posted --Mum looks happy he looks ------------sorry to say he looks Dodgy and slimey ..steal ypour mothers passport --she can do a lot better -0 -
So far all he has asked for is sunglasses
and a guide dog?0 -
If it makes any differnce I met a bloke in Turkey who told me all about his English girlfriend. She had come over the year before to work in a hotel and they were about to move to the UK to try that for a while. He seemed genuinely attached to the lady. He even asked how the UK felt about Turkish people and if he would have any trouble. We told him he would be fine as there were lots of Turkish here. We then asked where they were going to settle.
He said Tunbridge Wells....0 -
If it makes any differnce I met a bloke in Turkey who told me all about his English girlfriend. She had come over the year before to work in a hotel and they were about to move to the UK to try that for a while. He seemed genuinely attached to the lady. He even asked how the UK felt about Turkish people and if he would have any trouble. We told him he would be fine as there were lots of Turkish here. We then asked where they were going to settle.
Nice Area-- a cricket Village being turkish he will be well at home -
He said Tunbridge Wells....0 -
This is very common in poorer countries and for some reason Muslim men tend to go for western girls regardless of age. For instance, my mum's best friend's daughter who was only 14 was being pursued by an 18 year old Egyptian waiter who kept buying her flowers and telling her and her parents how fond he was of her. All sounded a bit suspect if you ask me but I think the real reason is that they are looking for a better life or a wife on the arm they can boast as coming from Britain. Not sure our cultures really mix as it's my understanding Muslim males are supposed to be the dominant member of the family. I could be wrong though.0
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tanned skin and muslim? he must be a thieving sunglasses salesman................
let her get on with it, just be there for her regardless.0 -
But the problem is, what can you do to stop her? - maybe all you can do unfortunately is be there to help her pick up the pieces if it goes badly which there are probably strong odds it will do so.0
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tanned skin and muslim? he must be a thieving sunglasses salesman................
If not regardless........... be there to get sunglassed back ....bound to be Ray ban he wants
let her get on with it, just be there for her regardless.0 -
Don't show her this thread.
Show her the internet dating one instead....0 -
Weegie I am trying to pull Sadie''s mum here come on give me a break
Show her the thread Sadie 8+) I can do the 2 timing dirty rat bit without her going to Tunisia
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Weegie I am trying to pull Sadie''s mum here come on give me a break
Sadie's mum prefers a man who takes care of his "personal" grooming so that rules you out NLA.
Show her the thread Sadie 8+) I can do the 2 timing dirty rat bit without her going to Tunisia
On the other hand me and Sadie Snr are almost the same age so we'd share common interests, memories, etc : - )
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PMSLSo far all he has asked for is sunglasses
and a guide dog?0 -
henners nothing can smell as bad as your moth ball cardies
anyway ewveryone knows best way to the daughter is via the mother 8+p0 -
Sadie there is a well known con going on in countries like that, based in resort hotels. It preys on loneliness and the desire to be loved. Having three or four on the go is not difficult or uncommon. The easiest way to test it is for her to ask HIM to send money. Don't let her lose a shed load of cash as well if she is going to be broken hearted.
If it's genuine I wish them well. Watch out for circumstances like sick mothers requiring operations in the meantime.0 -
Hi sj, any update? Have just read about actress Anna Chancellor who's been with an Alegrian taxi driver for 14 years 'against the odds'. They met by random not contrived in any way. So thought of you and your mum. Am still VERY suspicious of your mum's friend's motives, so hope it all works out. And soon.0
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I have voiced my concerns and she said she lived with a conman for 7 years which is true, this man may well be a fake but he makes her feel good and to let her enjoy it. She said she is aware of the risks and will not send any money or marry for the wrong reasons. She then asked me a question that I found difficult to answer.
At what point do I decide it is genuine, what will it take for people to say okay he is for real?
I said I don't know...0 -
You are totally right to be concerned sadie, I would be too.0
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I guess the question is, do I wish someone had managed to shake me out of being completely deluded by love ?
and sadly no definite answers, one time a big yes another time, a huge no. All we have are out instincts, just make sure you voice them so you feel you have done everything in hindsight.0 -
At least she does seem aware of the risks and says she isn't going to send money. Hopefully he will never ask and if he does and isn't genuine, she won't send any and will realise if he isn't genuine. If he isn't genuine he may be prepared to wait, especially if he has other 'options'. Yes, hard to say, if he is genuine, how long it'll take to accept it. But if he is, he'll understand that. I'd still want to check him out though! To show him up asap if not genuine.0
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You have hit the nail on the head PF. That is exactly my take on it if I could afford a holiday to Tunisia Id be tempted to go check him out. Latest news is he has been suspended from his job but apparently he is okay for money because his dad has a good job and his mum is a nurse. My mum also said he couldn't ask for money for any medical treatment because they have their equivalent to the nhs out there.0
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A friend of mine visited Turkey and met a man 15 years younger. They got married very quickly and he came to live with her in England. Everything seemed okay for a couple of years until he got his British passport. He then brought back his pregnant Turkish girlfriend whom he had been visiting in Turkey and who is the same age as him. He divorced my friend and married his girlfriend. He still owes my friend about £10K. My friend believed everything he had told her and I would consider her to be an intelligent person.0
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Gosh sadie, this is a difficult one. All I can say is if this chap is only interacting with your mum in isolation of everything else, then things might seem cocooned within their relationship. However if this chap knows your mum has a hinterland so to speak, you and the rest of your family rooting for your mum, and her situation here in the UK, then he may have a more rounded view of everything. So maybe if you can't go to visit, a polite email or something may at least signal that he isn't dealing with your mum in complete isolation.0
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This thread is awful. Some horrible xenophobic prejudices being exhibited by some. What's the guy done wrong? He showed her a lovely week and introduced her to his family. How dare he!
He probably has a decent life, decent job and is quite happy to stay in Tunisia, with his family, who by the sound of it are worried about her motives.
Suspicion like this is such a typically western thing.0 -
Sadie - I am in the process of splitting up with my partner and am moving back to London. I have some hair, some of my own teeth and a few quid in the bank. Maybe your mum would be interested in giving up a handsome, virile 30 something for a slightly overweight 52 yr-old Charlton fan?
If blokes like me are the alternative in the UK, actually good luck to her. Try to manage your own anxiety and be kind to yourself. Nothing you can do about it, and there may be nothing needs doing.0 -
This thread is awful. Some horrible xenophobic prejudices being exhibited by some. What's the guy done wrong? He showed her a lovely week and introduced her to his family. How dare he!
It never hurts to be cautious Ashtray. There are very few stories of these type of relationships lasting the test of time, and there are some horror stories of them going badly wrong.
He probably has a decent life, decent job and is quite happy to stay in Tunisia, with his family, who by the sound of it are worried about her motives.
Suspicion like this is such a typically western thing.0 -
Thats been true of every relationship I have ever been in! Why didn't anybody ever stop me?0
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No one appears to be biting with you trolling today Ashtray. Guess we must all be preoccupied with the game eh?
Poor efforts by the way and way too obvious.0
