Mine have all been universally shite - but I rarely take sick days anyway so don;t have to lie that often.
Best one I have ever heard was 'Tony unfortunately cannot attend the meeting today as he has been savaged by a Leopard'. It was actually true as well - every year this bloke goes to Africa to help in a breeding programme for wild big cats and, whilst building a temporary enclosure, one of them jumped on his back and tore him about fifty stitches' worth of gashes!
Don't do it myself but I used to manage a gay bloke who called in sick and was a bit vague. When he sent his doctor's note in the reason stated was "Collapsed rectal muscles"
I once left work early on a Thursday feeling sick, flew to Marbella with the boys, phoned in from the beach in Puerto Banus on the Friday morning and came back to work (with a tan) on the Monday.
Didnt have any holiday left and didnt wanna miss out. Cant believe I got away with it.
Never taken a moody in 32 years. Perhaps I'm naive? A couple of years back one of my staff had three days off for the distress caused by his cat dying!!
i haven't thrown a sicky.
mate of mine said he couldn't go to work one friday as he was doing a charity bungee jump so said he'd take the day as holiday. the truth was that he was hungover. what an extravagent lie! on monday they were trying to find out how it went and wondered if there were any photos!
before I worked for myself I would just say I had a client meeting. That way you get a day off and expenses.
When I worked for Hackney council there was a serious discussion in a team meeting over why couldn't you carry your sick leave forward to the next year. Me laughing out loud at this didn't go down to well. Then again the person asking did was about 6'2" very skinny and came to work dressed as a woman sometimes and in leather hot pants at other times.
I didn't stay with Hackney that long. Didn't really fit in.
[cite]Posted By: DaveMehmet[/cite]Why, not skinny enough!!
what makes you think that? : - )
[cite]Posted By: PassItToLeaburn[/cite]Maybe he was fearing an imminent muscular collapse too?
No, wasn't gay. Just liked dressing in women's clothes. They tried to stop him as some people were offended and he made a big tribunial thing of it.
Was just a strange guy. Came from a quite well to do family but tried to hide it. Once he was screaming down the phone, in the office on the work phone, at his bank that it was their job to give him a bigger overdraft.
He also used to get really annoyed if I ever worked late as he used to wait till everyone has left, leave himself and then claim he'd been there for hours to clock up the flexi-time. I used to leave and then come back claiming to have "forgotten" something and his face would be like thunder.
I have the best job in the world, I work for the best company in the world, I have the best gaffer in the world and would never throw a sickie unless genuine and yes, he does read this site
Not quite a sick note but one morning I couldn’t face going to work with a massive hangover so I took a sicky. Round about mid-day, I received a phone call from my mate who was down from Scotland and wanting a beer, which was just what the doctor ordered. Having sunk a few for some reason decided to head to Germany that evening to meet up with some friends for a beer. Cab to Gatwick, and arrived in Frankfurt about 10pm. Next day decided to head to Stuttgart to have a beer with some other pals. On the train to Stuttgart, we decided to stay on board the train and go to Belgrade (never been there before). Arrived in Belgrade 22 hour later - arrested within 20 minutes for dealing on the black market. Bought ticket back to Frankfurt for the next day (I have never bought anything with so many numbers - it cost squillions of lira!). Went to casino and then chucked out for being too pissed. Travelled back to Frankfurt by train on the party express and drinking for nearly all the journey 22 hours. We had many hours till the flight back to London so go pizzed in Frankfurt. Almost missed flight back to London, couldn’t pay all the bar bill as we run out of dosh but got back to London having to work the next day otherwise I needed a real doc certificate. Back in the office and looked very ill. Did the trick at work as I received sympathy from my work colleagues saying they think I’ve come back to work too soon – if only they knew ;o)
I once used a snow day when there was no snow, ok the day before there was and i lived out in the sticks compared to others at work so noone could know if there was or not. I literally woke up didnt look outside and called in a snow day, went back to sleep and when i looked outside it had cleared and the roads were fine lol
Comments
Best one I have ever heard was 'Tony unfortunately cannot attend the meeting today as he has been savaged by a Leopard'. It was actually true as well - every year this bloke goes to Africa to help in a breeding programme for wild big cats and, whilst building a temporary enclosure, one of them jumped on his back and tore him about fifty stitches' worth of gashes!
Is that code for a gay sexual practice??!!
Is that code for a gay sexual practice??!![/quote]
dont know,you tell us?
Didnt have any holiday left and didnt wanna miss out. Cant believe I got away with it.
I'm a manager of a print/post room of a largish lawyers in London and I tell ya I could write a book with some of the excuses I've had over the years.
mate of mine said he couldn't go to work one friday as he was doing a charity bungee jump so said he'd take the day as holiday. the truth was that he was hungover. what an extravagent lie! on monday they were trying to find out how it went and wondered if there were any photos!
I reckon shock may have been accepted as a valid excuse.
When I worked for Hackney council there was a serious discussion in a team meeting over why couldn't you carry your sick leave forward to the next year. Me laughing out loud at this didn't go down to well. Then again the person asking did was about 6'2" very skinny and came to work dressed as a woman sometimes and in leather hot pants at other times.
I didn't stay with Hackney that long. Didn't really fit in.
what makes you think that? : - )
No, wasn't gay. Just liked dressing in women's clothes. They tried to stop him as some people were offended and he made a big tribunial thing of it.
Was just a strange guy. Came from a quite well to do family but tried to hide it. Once he was screaming down the phone, in the office on the work phone, at his bank that it was their job to give him a bigger overdraft.
He also used to get really annoyed if I ever worked late as he used to wait till everyone has left, leave himself and then claim he'd been there for hours to clock up the flexi-time. I used to leave and then come back claiming to have "forgotten" something and his face would be like thunder.
How sick are you, was the question.
I'm in bed with my gran.
Not in the UK but Jimmy lives in France
Not something i generally do but a sneaky one