Attention: Please take a moment to consider our terms and conditions before posting.

What has been your best sick note excuse.

124»

Comments

  • Used to work there around 2011/2012. Can vouch for the drinking culture. And the Fishcoteque.

    Job I had before IPC I went out with a few mates from work. Phoned in sick the next day not realising my boss had seen a load of photos on Facebook of me sh!tfaced. Luckily I got a slap on the wrist and told ‘If you’re gonna do that, don’t let pictures end up on Facebook’ Sound advice. 
    Golden rule, make your Facebook private and never, ever have work colleagues as friends on there.
  • DA9 said:
    Golden rule, make your Facebook private and never, ever have work colleagues as friends on there.
    This ALL DAY LONG.
  • And don't tell people that you like football or have a team. 
  • And don't tell people that you like football or have a team. 
    or drink!
  • Not me but my boss. Two kitchen floods, countless car has a flat battery but best was three days for his father's "heart attack" but he went on holiday to Canaries less than a week later.

    Total tosser. I gave the dept manager a choice of him or me, he chose him. Luckily company went tits up months later without me.
  • DA9 said:
    Golden rule, make your Facebook private and never, ever have work colleagues as friends on there.
    Or don’t do social media (which I don’t) !!!
  • Cloudworm said:
    Some advice please... I'm after an excuse to take 2 weeks off work. Something I can foresee about 8 weeks beforehand, but something inevitable. This gives me a chance to get paid overtime sorting things out before I'm off.

    I'm thinking of a medical procedure that is likely to have an 8-10 week waiting list, not too serious, or embarrassing, but bad enough to lay me up for the fortnight. I'm a bloke in my 50s, so hysterectomy isn't going to cut it.

    Thanks in advance.
    Liking this, but why not cover yourself by actually having a completely unnecessary medical procedure? 

    The snip? Teeth implants? Hair weave? Butt implant? 

    Something that needs resting time and can be accepted as having a bit of delayed soreness requiring extra days. 
  • When I worked for the DWP, a colleague was regularly off sick , with various reasons as to why.

    One warm summer's morning, she called in to say she was in no fit state to leave her house that morning as a snake had entered the house via the back door earlier & she was too frightened to set foot outside....

    No, this was NOT "somewhere in Asia" .

    But, Dartford. 
    Warm summer's morning, or January Fanny? :)
  • aliwibble said:
    Warm summer's morning, or January Fanny? :)
    OMG !!!! M. Poirot , I presume ? 

    Mind you, a lot of marbles have been lost since then ! 
  • edited January 14
    .
  • Sponsored links:


  • OMG !!!! M. Poirot , I presume ? 

    Mind you, a lot of marbles have been lost since then ! 
    Nah, I just hadn't read the thread before, so I saw your story and Leroy Ambrose's one about the leopard twice in quick succession, which meant the discrepancy jumped out at me.
  • Liking this, but why not cover yourself by actually having a completely unnecessary medical procedure? 

    The snip? Teeth implants? Hair weave? Butt implant? 

    Something that needs resting time and can be accepted as having a bit of delayed soreness requiring extra days. 
    Yeah, it's complicated by the fact that I don't live in the UK. Here, there is no sick pay, only holiday pay. As a result, the sick note isn't required. The time I want off is blocked off as a no holiday period as it is a critical time, annually , for the business (it isn't really). So hair weave etc won't fly. Needs some sort of unavoidable element to it. Getting ducks in a row beforehand with the overtime will also sugar the pill for them, so an 8 week waiting list scenario actually works well.

     I don't want anything too serious because I don't want people to worry about me (too much). Chizz's / Chat GPT's hernia could work but it means remembering to hobble about at work all the time. Varicose veins maybe, but it would be a bit awkward if someone asks to see them!
  • My Boss phoned me one morning to say she wont be in as her son has Diarrhoea , didnt think much of it until someone mentioned her son was 18   
  • "Got to the station and realised I had odd socks on"
    Failed my probation.
Sign In or Register to comment.

Roland Out Forever!