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Tiger Woods

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    What's the difference between a car and a golf ball...?

    Tiger can drive a golf ball 400 yards...
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    I cant see this one anywhere, so apology's if I missed it.............

    When interviewed by police
    Mrs Woods was asked, how many times did you hit your husband with the golf club?
    Six or seven, came the reply....................But put me down for a four!!
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    what's the difference between tiger and santa ?
    santa stops after three ho's
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    What do Tiger Woods and baby fur seals have in common?

    They've both been clubbed by Norwegians.
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    edited December 2009
    I was explaining this to my wife the other day and bear with it but I think Tiger's the most faithful man on the planet.

    He is the first billionaire sportman, he's allegedly charming, he's young, fit and good looking by most accounts. Now, stay with this, he must be away from his wife a huge amount of time, say three hundred days a year and flies all around the world to the most glamourous places, staying in the best hotels, going to the best restaurants, corporate shin digs and clubs. Now say on average he gets propositioned or it made clear it's available maybe 10 times a day that's 3000 times a year! If he's only slept with 8 of 'em that's less than 0.2% or in other words he's 99.8% faithful, so given the amount and quality on offer to him, I think she should be grateful myself really.

    [...my wife wasn't wearing it either]
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    [cite]Posted By: Ormiston Addick[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Chunes[/cite]He's never been one to court publicity and says his apologies should be to his family and not in a press-release. As far as I'm concerned the papers should leave him alone. I'm not interested in trying to deconstruct a man and his family.

    Not one to court publicity? He may not be in the Beckham-league as far as self-promotion goes but he is certainly no Paul Scholes either.

    Look at his blue-chip sponsorts, American Express, Gillette, Accenture, Nike, AT&T and Gatorade - what do you think they are paying him for exactly?

    They are not paying him for his golfing skills at all, they are paying to be associated with his ultra-clean, dedicated, honest, professional image because THAT is how they want their brands to be viewed as well. Do you think they would have given him a contract if the world knew he was banging half the loose women of America? Of course not.

    He had THE best global sports brand on the planet without doubt and these revelations have wrecked that, especially that voice mail where he asks the cocktail waitress to change her voice-mail in case his wife calls - that went down very, very badly in the conservative US golfing/corporate market which is dominated by the Religious Right.

    If Tiger Woods was worried about his family getting hurt then I am thinking maybe he might have tried just a tad harder to keep his Hampton inside his Nike underpants when confronted by cocktail waitresses/porn stars/TV interviewers when temptation was around, bit late complaining about that now.

    He will come back as a golfer, no doubt about that, but as a "brand" he is damaged beyond repair outside the core golf gear market. His major sponsors have not run a single TV spot featuring Tiger in the US since this broke and won't do so for a long time yet.

    Of course, his sponsors are not going to "drop" him straight away because that would bring more bad PR, but how can the likes of Accenture and American Express, which are brands basically built on trust, have him as their corporate face? Impossible.

    If he thinks he can hide behind his website and not come out and face the cameras then he is sorely mistaken and is getting some terrible advice, the only way to begin his redemption is by fronting up and apologising publicly to all concerned in his family and wider circles of friends and associates.

    The last sex scandal this big in the US was Clinton/Lewinsky and it was only when Clinton had the courage to front up and apologise - after his initial ridiculous parsing on the issue (deciding that "sexual relations" only referred to full sex rather than oral sex) - that he began to restore his reputation to some degree.

    Woods has humilated his wife and family publicly and needs to have the courage to apologise publicly, anything else is a major cop-out and shows a real lack of class on his part, although that is hardly a surprise given his recent form.

    Going to have to disagree here. Clinton's character directly related to his ability to govern an entire country. Tiger's relates to his ability to endorse several multi-billon dollar companies. Why should I care if he has let them down? Why should anyone? They move on, find someone else. He loses a portion of his salary (not going to make much of a difference to him).

    If he wants to keep the story and his apologies to his family, then good on him. I applaud that. And I hope and pray that it starts a precedent.
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    edited December 2009
    Going to have to disagree here. Clinton's character directly related to his ability to govern an entire country. Tiger's relates to his ability to endorse several multi-billon dollar companies. Why should I care if he has let them down? Why should anyone? They move on, find someone else. He loses a portion of his salary (not going to make much of a difference to him).

    If he wants to keep the story and his apologies to his family, then good on him. I applaud that. And I hope and pray that it starts a precedent.[/quote]

    That's a very interesting question to which there are no easy answers.

    Regarding Clinton, does his inability to resist a blow-job from an intern really affect his ability to make decisions regarding the future of the country?

    Look at Jack Kennedy, the guys was rooting the arse off Marilyn Monroe and countless others whilst President, yet still displayed incredible nerve during the Cuban missile crisis where he faced down the Russians in an epic struggle.

    Indeed, it is arguable that Clinton's best days as President - in terms of achievements and legislation that he managed to get passed by Congress - came during and after the Lewinsky scandal.

    Who would you prefer as President, a policy and political genius like Clinton who cheats on his wife or a moron like Bush who was dog faithful to Laura but was pig ignorant? Not a tough question for me.

    As for Woods, clearly his off field conduct has not had much effect on his golfing success, he came down here to Oz last month and seemingly spent every night rooting the brains out of Ms. Uchitel in Crown Casino, Melbourne, and yet still won the tournament he was playing in with ease.

    I am totally uninterested in his sex life and what he does away from the course, that is his business and his off field life should in no way interfere with his golfing career.

    However, there is no doubt that his sponsors, especially Amex, Accenture and AT&T are buying his IMAGE which is not just of a brilliant, dedicated golfer but also of a clean living family man, devoted to his beautiful wife and family - that's how he pulled in such big dollars because those companies wanted their brands associated with the Tiger brand.

    You don't see the likes of Amex, Accenture and AT&T sponsoring gang-banging boxers, baseballers, basketballers and NFL players precisely because they do not have the wholesome and unblemished image that Tiger Woods displayed for so long.

    As for his apology, well, if anyone thinks that the media beast is going to let this guy get in front of a microphone without busting his arse wide open about his conduct, I am afraid to say, that they have no idea how the game is played.

    No editor is going to send a reporter to a Tiger Woods press conference and ask them to ask him questions about his latest thoughts on course design. Not going to happen.

    Tiger simply cannot hope to go out there and front up and talk about his backswing or whatever until he has publicly spoken about what has gone on these last few weeks, it is a gigantic elephant in the room that cannot be ignored and his sponsors will certainly push him hard to do it as well.

    Of course, this is not as serious as what happened with Ted Kennedy at Chappaquiddick where a young woman lost her life, but it has the same feel of an individual trying to wriggle out of facing up to the consequences of their actions.

    Kennedy's public image never recovered from Chappaquiddick and it cost him the chance to run for President, it is likely Woods will experience similar permanent damage unless a full mea culpa is issued very, very soon.
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    edited December 2009
    That's my point. You're right when you say no editor would send a reporter to an interview to ask him about his backswing. But if he doesn't want to play the tabloid game, they should leave him alone. He shouldn't have to publically air a private family matter just because people want to sell crappy newspapers to schaudenfraude gossips. Nobody should - unless they're in the Jordan mould in which case they deserve the intrusion because they invited it.

    The point I was making with Clinton was that his public perception as a politician is a lot more important than the public perception of a sportsman. His position meant that a public apology was necessary, especially after lying over the whole issue. Tiger Woods obviously wants to keep his apologies to his family, the only people he owes them to. Amex, Accenture, AT&T... Pfffft... Hopefully they're feeling pretty gutted. It would actually be impossible for me to care any less than I do them.
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    Well, we shall soon see, my bet is that we will be seeing Mr. Woods on Oprah doing a "sympathetic" interview complete with fulsome apology before he tees up for a pro-tournament again.

    You are quite correct in saying that the perception of Clinton as POTUS was more important than that of Woods', that is very true.

    The problem is that Woods kept his image locked-down so tight because the press stictched him up real bad in 1997 (the imfamous GQ interview) so forever after he kept a real tight rein on his press relations and this image of him as a devoted professional and wholesome family man - even a bit boring really - developed.

    His public image has now spun wildly out of control - something that he will obviously hate having worked so hard on keeping such a reign on it for over a decade - and if he wants to return it to even a halfway decent state (say, like Clinton's for example) then he will have to face the cameras and give the media their pound of flesh.

    Until he plays that game he will remain very much on the outer.
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    [cite]Posted By: Ormiston Addick[/cite]

    The problem is that Woods kept his image locked-down so tight because the press stictched him up real bad in 1997 (the imfamous GQ interview)

    what happened there??
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    Here you go.....

    http://www.gq.com/sports/profiles/199704/tiger-woods-profile?currentPage=1
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    cheers OA
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    Blimey, just reading The Sun and there's barely a woman with a pulse left he hasn't 'romped' with!

    FORE!

    No, about a dozen actually. . . .
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    last night's Standard diary page was funny - had a big piece on Kirsty Gallagher including some gushing quotes from her a few years back about her friendship with the Tiger, how he always called her up when he was over in the UK etc.

    Didn't state openly that she was his British bit on the side but it was obvious that was what they were referring to!
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    edited December 2009
    That rumour has been everywhere. Don't see what all the fuss is about.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kT6wfkK0L5g&feature=related


    oh.
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    [quote][cite]Posted By: kinveachyaddick[/cite]last night's Standard diary page was funny - had a big piece on Kirsty Gallagher including some gushing quotes from her a few years back about her friendship with the Tiger, how he always called her up when he was over in the UK etc.

    Didn't state openly that she was his British bit on the side but it was obvious that was what they were referring to![/quote]

    Yes, I bet her current boyfriend is just loving the current maelstrom......
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    Ironcially, Kirsty is pregnant at the moment. Not good all round really.
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    [quote][cite]Posted By: falconwood_1[/cite]Ironcially, Kirsty is pregnant at the moment. Not good all round really.[/quote]

    Ouch, I doubt if they're watching much of The Golf Channel in that house right now, or Sky News for that matter.

    Poor Bastard, bit hard to match it with The Tiger.
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    To me all this makes Woods achievements on the golf course even more astounding. How he's managed to concentrate on his game and continued to win numerous titles and stay so far ahead of everyone else whilst juggling all these women around is nothing short of amazing.
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    [cite]Posted By: Ormiston Addick[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: kinveachyaddick[/cite]last night's Standard diary page was funny - had a big piece on Kirsty Gallagher including some gushing quotes from her a few years back about her friendship with the Tiger, how he always called her up when he was over in the UK etc.

    Didn't state openly that she was his British bit on the side but it was obvious that was what they were referring to!

    Yes, I bet her current boyfriend is just loving the current maelstrom......

    so she shagged someone before they hooked up...hardly earth shattering news.

    Personally I think this gives Woods a human element. He was as robotic, efficient and brilliant as any sportsman EVER and now he's shown he can make mistakes.
    Maybe he's been a bit daft, and I can't see his marriage surviving, but he will come back from this as a golfer and I think will be respected for it.
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    And the most impressive part of this...he buffed Kirsty and then DID'NT tell everyone!! I'd have that broadcast to the world if I'd been there
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    i believe that the other tour pro's will have known all about it. what goes on on tour stays on tour, that kind of mentality. i bet he's got the dirt on a few other players. notice no other players sticking the boot in. i bet their all shi**ing themselves. lets face it golf is behind even darts in the sporting interest stakes when it comes to wags and gossip? as jordan always says..... 'any news is good news'!!!
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    edited December 2009
    [quote][cite]Posted By: Swisdom[/cite][quote][cite]Posted By: Ormiston Addick[/cite][quote][cite]Posted By: kinveachyaddick[/cite]last night's Standard diary page was funny - had a big piece on Kirsty Gallagher including some gushing quotes from her a few years back about her friendship with the Tiger, how he always called her up when he was over in the UK etc.

    Didn't state openly that she was his British bit on the side but it was obvious that was what they were referring to![/quote]

    Yes, I bet her current boyfriend is just loving the current maelstrom......[/quote]

    so she shagged someone before they hooked up...hardly earth shattering news.

    Personally I think this gives Woods a human element. He was as robotic, efficient and brilliant as any sportsman EVER and now he's shown he can make mistakes.
    Maybe he's been a bit daft, and I can't see his marriage surviving, but he will come back from this as a golfer and I think will be respected for it.[/quote]

    Not quite the same thing really, is it?

    Having to accept that your wife/boyfriend has had previous partners is just part of the deal, but I think that the jealousy factor might be a bit different if your missus had had a fling with the biggest sports star on the planet, that would certainly dent most males' self-confidence just a tad.

    It would be made even worse by rumors/speculation of the relationship being spread all over the Internet and media, not exactly ideal and not something I would want to go through and neither, I suspect, would most blokes.
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    edited December 2009
    Tiger has quit golf indefinitely according to his website.

    LINK
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    I'll believe it when it's on the OS :-O
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    edited December 2009
    I see that his lawyers have managed to obtain a gagging order in this country. Thank god our justice system has some respect, privacy, class and equality.

    You can't on the one hand talk about civil liberties for all and on the other, talk about how someone doesn't deserve the same privacy just because of the money they've made.
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    The man quits golf until marrige gets sorted. Its a sad day for the golfing world they have lost possibly the greatest of all time. Hopefully this all sorts itself out and hes back winning majors again asap.
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    Just watched his press conference .... couldnt imagine John Terry doing that :)
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    To me, Woods going into 'Therapy' for a sex addiction is a bit of a cheap way out. The bloke likes to rump tarts.....Who doesnt?!?!

    I like to try other drinks but it doesnt make me an alcoholic does it? ;-)
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    It seems funny seeing him without a baseball cap on!
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