[cite]Posted By: MCS[/cite]Carter, there is an awesome car fart trick i sometimes get my mrs with if i am driving, let one off (it needs to be a good one tho, you know proper gag fest)
well open the passengers window for them, just a lil bit tho, just for like 3 seconds or so, then do it back up, what happens is thus, the stench gets sucked straight straight out of the tiny window opening, but cos you shut it after 3 seconds, the smell will linger right under the nostrils of the passenger, its a real quality way of inflicting maximum guff sharing. You can try it with anyone, you do have to have both window controls on your door tho, and if you manage a silent one, even better!!
My mrs is a lucky one isn't she lol
There is something about gruffing, air biscuits, farts, trumps, grunting and fluffing, that really make me laugh, the smell of a gag fester, or the sound of a wet one, just makes me laugh with shaking shoulders that carter explained!
Don't even reckon i'll stop laughing at farts!! lol
Add to that whacking the heating on full blast really does the trick! My ex Mrs made me stop the car once cos she couldn't breathe!
Only free seat home on the train a couple of weeks back was next to the loo.
Small guy disappears into it. 10-15 seconds later the loudest rasping earth shattering fart was heard. Guy sitting across from me goes red and starts shaking uncontrollably, bloke next to me his shoulders start to wobble. By this time I'm gone with tears rolling down my face. Within seconds the whole compartment is laughing, most of us loudly.
Bloke comes out of loo, looks at us as if we are all mad, let's another rip and disappears off into the next carriage.
[cite]Posted By: BDL[/cite]Only free seat home on the train a couple of weeks back was next to the loo.
Small guy disappears into it. 10-15 seconds later the loudest rasping earth shattering fart was heard. Guy sitting across from me goes red and starts shaking uncontrollably, bloke next to me his shoulders start to wobble. By this time I'm gone with tears rolling down my face. Within seconds the whole compartment is laughing, most of us loudly.
Bloke comes out of loo, looks at us as if we are all mad, let's another rip and disappears off into the next carriage.
my first day of senior school, sitting in the second row from the back in geography lesson. im brewing up a right beauty. while i contemplate whether or not i should let rip or hold it in, the thought alone makes me chuckle. as i giggle i let out a thunderous fart which is followed by a few more as my body shakes with laughter. i'll never forget the look of sheer disgust on some of the pupils faces as they turned round to see who had made such a noise. clearly it was I, sniggering at my own fart. 17 years on and it still cracks me up
Few years ago me and the missus and our two friends went to the theatre in London. Now my mate he's a Jock and he drinks like one. What's worse i was trying to keep up with him. So come the intermission we're busting for a Jimmy. Rush to the loo, it's rammed. Out of the corner of my eye i notice another door ajar, inside there are two very small and low urinals, obviously meant for kids. I elbow John "look" we disappear through the door. Unknown to me someone was watching us and followed. Well! as the bladder emptied the pressure change caused a massive ripper to vent..... then i feel a tap on my shoulder.....look round, there's a bloke waiting behind me...."thanks very much mate" he says...............i dissolved, John dissolved, we returned to our wives still crying with laughter. It took until after the show to be able to tell the women what had happened.
Comments
James is coming through the ranks - Has potential!
Add to that whacking the heating on full blast really does the trick! My ex Mrs made me stop the car once cos she couldn't breathe!
Redarmy, i'll have to give that a blast! (literally) lol
Fame at last.
The dutch oven, whereby the recipients head is forcibly held under the covers to get full enjoyment or...
The waft, where after a couple of seconds from releasing grunt you give the covers a hearty flick thereby jetting the air upwards
The stench can only be described as a mixture of rotting flesh, cabbage and sewage.
Anyone had that mix lately?
This results in some of the foulest smelling farts I've ever come across, they would make Gumbo proud!!
I can say from personal experience that AD is the THE DADDY the one he did in the service station at Clagget Lane was Legendary!
It was heard over 100yrds away and got the Burger Place closed down,yellow and black hazard tape everywhere!!
tears in my eyes laughing..............
Small guy disappears into it. 10-15 seconds later the loudest rasping earth shattering fart was heard. Guy sitting across from me goes red and starts shaking uncontrollably, bloke next to me his shoulders start to wobble. By this time I'm gone with tears rolling down my face. Within seconds the whole compartment is laughing, most of us loudly.
Bloke comes out of loo, looks at us as if we are all mad, let's another rip and disappears off into the next carriage.
You had to be there.
sh*t, the tears are back !
fecking hilariious BDL
Holding the tears back!
Seen the guy loads of times at Cannon Street, usually gets the 17.02 to Strood.
Says it all
The locals would of snaffled that within miliseconds
Now have to print it to show her all the whiffy details !
That'll keep her quiet at work today.
For your sake, I hope she doesn't find your log on and has a browse!!
my first day of senior school, sitting in the second row from the back in geography lesson. im brewing up a right beauty. while i contemplate whether or not i should let rip or hold it in, the thought alone makes me chuckle. as i giggle i let out a thunderous fart which is followed by a few more as my body shakes with laughter. i'll never forget the look of sheer disgust on some of the pupils faces as they turned round to see who had made such a noise. clearly it was I, sniggering at my own fart. 17 years on and it still cracks me up
Rush to the loo, it's rammed. Out of the corner of my eye i notice another door ajar, inside there are two very small and low urinals, obviously meant for kids. I elbow John "look" we disappear through the door. Unknown to me someone was watching us and followed.
Well! as the bladder emptied the pressure change caused a massive ripper to vent..... then i feel a tap on my shoulder.....look round, there's a bloke waiting behind me...."thanks very much mate" he says...............i dissolved, John dissolved, we returned to our wives still crying with laughter. It took until after the show to be able to tell the women what had happened.