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Things you only learned late in life

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  • oohaahmortimeroohaahmortimer
    [cite]Posted By: uncle[/cite]I've learned that some people on this site are a little bit slow ;-)

    i thought the wear/where's the soap mob were kidding were they?? ........scary
  • MiserableoldgitMiserableoldgit
    [cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]Millwall fan goes into the bakers shop asks for loaf of bread.

    "brown or white?" says the Baker.

    "Doesn't matter, I've got my bike outside" replies the spanner.

    Is that the same Spanner who went to the cake shop ?
    "Birthday Cake ?" said the shopkeeper.
    "I've got my bicycle clips" said the spanner.
  • uncleuncle
    [cite]Posted By: oohaahmortimer[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: uncle[/cite]I've learned that some people on this site are a little bit slow ;-)

    i thought the wear/where's the soap mob were kidding were they?? ........scary

    NO !!!
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    edited September 2009
    [cite]Posted By: uncle[/cite]I've learned that some people on this site are a little bit slow ;-)

    You must be a bit slow if it has taken you this long to work that out : - )
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    [cite]Posted By: Miserableold-ish git[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]Millwall fan goes into the bakers shop asks for loaf of bread.

    "brown or white?" says the Baker.

    "Doesn't matter, I've got my bike outside" replies the spanner.

    Is that the same Spanner who went to the cake shop ?
    "Birthday Cake ?" said the shopkeeper.
    "I've got my bicycle clips" said the spanner.

    No, they are all equally thick.
  • thai malaysia addickthai malaysia addick
    Two TV aerials fall madly in love and decide to get married. The wedding was rubbish, but the reception was fantastic
  • razilrazil
    edited September 2009
    what was that bad joke about Rod Hull and a TV aerial?
  • seth plumseth plum
    My wife went to Afghanistan
    Djlalabad?
    I sing very well thank you very much!
  • bibblebibble
    What was Biddie Baxter's name before she got really old?
  • Bournemouth AddickBournemouth Addick
    I've learned as I've got older that youth really is wasted on the young.
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  • Curb_ItCurb_It
    i didnt get the soap joke either.
  • GoonerhaterGoonerhater
    shame i was old before i leanered the truth about females in red stilletos.
  • wickfordwickford
    Two nuns riding their bikes down a cobbled street.
    One says to the other 'I've never come this way before!'
  • LargeAddickLargeAddick
    [cite]Posted By: wickford[/cite]Two nuns riding their bikes down a cobbled street.
    One says to the other 'I've never come this way before!'

    love that one !!
  • Henry IrvingHenry Irving
    The past tense of learn : - )
  • ShagShag
    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]i didnt get the soap joke either.

    i'm not having that !
  • Bournemouth AddickBournemouth Addick
    [cite]Posted By: Henry Irving[/cite]The past tense of learn : - )

    I've also learnt that pedants can be really, really annoying... :-P
  • Oggy RedOggy Red
    [cite]Posted By: Shag[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]i didnt get the soap joke either.

    i'm not having that !

    Curb_It is innocent ..... official.

    ;o)
  • wickfordwickford
    Back on track:
    I thought sticky back plastic was rolls of vinyl wallpaper as used in kitchens/bathrooms etc?
  • razilrazil
    [cite]Posted By: wickford[/cite]Back on track:
    I thought sticky back plastic was rolls of vinyl wallpaper as used in kitchens/bathrooms etc?

    i make you right, not necessarily vynl etc but yes plastic with a sticky back.... thought they said sticky tape instead of sello tape.
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  • razilrazil
    [cite]Posted By: Oggy Red[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Shag[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Curb_It[/cite]i didnt get the soap joke either.

    i'm not having that !

    Curb_It is innocent ..... official.

    ;o)

    Educated by nuns? so no doubt hence that joke was supressed...

    :D
  • LargeAddickLargeAddick
    no need now though as Velcro has arrived.
  • ken from bexleyken from bexley
    What was Biddie Baxter's name before she got really old?

    'Chicken Baxter' as in the soup....
  • Friend Or DefoeFriend Or Defoe
    edited September 2009
    I don't get the birthday cake, bicycle clip joke. :(


    Edit: Is he telling the cake seller that he doesn't need it wrapped up!?
  • razilrazil
    [cite]Posted By: Friend Or Defoe[/cite]I don't get the birthday cake, bicycle clip joke. :(

    no one wants to admit that or explain why in case they get it wrong or it isn't really funny at all, or are you kidding too?

    It may of course be alluding to Millwall fans just being very thick... but don't quote me

    :D


    Asterix books had funny names, some of which I only realised many years later.
  • Friend Or DefoeFriend Or Defoe
    [cite]Posted By: razil[/cite]
    [cite]Posted By: Friend Or Defoe[/cite]I don't get the birthday cake, bicycle clip joke. :(

    no one wants to admit that or explain why in case they get it wrong or it isn't really funny at all, or are you kidding too?

    It may of course be alluding to Millwall fans just being very thick... but don't quote me

    :D


    Asterix books had funny names, some of which I only realised many years later.
    Like the druid, get-a-fix!
  • Heath HeroHeath Hero
    My wife's been to Poole.

    In Dorset?

    Yes, she'd recommend it anyone.
  • BlackForestRedsBlackForestReds
    My mate's going to a casino in the South of France.
    Toulouse?
    No, to win hopefully.
  • olsterolster
    A woman walks up to a bar tender and orders a double entendre, so he gave her one.
  • March51March51
    My brother's on the stage: he chews hammers

    Is he a professional?

    No, he's an amachewer!
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