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'Fundamentally'

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  • In my experience 'leave it with me' means 'I have no interest in helping you, I just want you to stop talking to me'.

    I also despise 'going forward' being put on the end of every sentence in a meeting
    I like the 'leave it with me approach' i'll have to start using that one... leave it with me.. ;-0
  • Umm..

    .. didn't we do this a while ago?

    http://forum.charltonlife.com/discussion/37652/corporate-life/p1

    Let's not re-invent the wheel, eh, guys?
  • Umm.. .. didn't we do this a while ago? http://forum.charltonlife.com/discussion/37652/corporate-life/p1 Let's not re-invent the wheel, eh, guys?


    Carly Burn was just taking a greenfield approach to the problem. Process renewal, as it were.

    I used to work for a guy who used "clearly" to start a lot of sentences - most of the time, it was far from clear!

  • 24/7.

    Anybody who uses "finger quotes".

  • Big Hairy Goals is our latest.......

    Whatever.
  • Cant go to work nowdays without thinking of "The Office" everytime someone comes out with this sort of blurb. Gervais nailed it.

  • I get an impulse to shout "Liar!" when I hear "... to be honest with you..."  

  • ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

    "You really can't fail with compatible reciprocal resources."                                  ?

    "This is no time to bite the bullet with our parallel strategic matrix approaches."    ?

    "We need to cascade memos about our homogenised relative alignment."           ?

    ?   ?    ?   ?????????????????????????????????????????  ?   ?   ?   ?   ?  ?   ?
  • Big Hairy Goals is our latest.......


    Whatever.
    "Big hairy audacious goals" was what I was taught
  • People who use "clearly" when it patently isn't clear at all.

    "You'll be aware that ..." or its variant "Of course, you'll know that ..."- no I bloody don't so stop trying to make me look stupid.  

    "Heads up" used as a noun, normally by someone whose head's up their own arse.


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  • Not quite the same as annoying work sayings, but being called a client by your hairdresser. Pretentious nonsense.
  • Not quite the same as annoying work sayings, but being called a client by your hairdresser. Pretentious nonsense.
    Don't get me started! When did "passengers" become "customers" on the railways?!
  • Slightly tangential, but I had to leave a room once when my boss, on the subject of changes in the TV advertising market, used the phrase (deadpan) "digital penetration".


  • 'Big ticket' items are all we talk about in meetings, what is a big ticket, i get an image of a 40ft season ticket booklet?!
  • edited October 2011

    I'm delighted that 'paradigm shift' seems to have run its course, but more than a little worried that it has been replaced by 'quantum leap'.

    Interesting to note that all guidelines, processes and 'ways of working' need periodically to be 'refreshed' (ideally pronounced .. refraaashed).

    And my new, all-time favourite ...."Sorry, in meet.  Catch up later?"

  • edited October 2011

    Oh, forgot to mention ...

    ... does anyone else have to 'escalate issues'?  According to the 80/20 rule anyway.

  • People who use "clearly" when it patently isn't clear at all.

    "You'll be aware that ..." or its variant "Of course, you'll know that ..."- no I bloody don't so stop trying to make me look stupid.  

    "Heads up" used as a noun, normally by someone whose head's up their own arse.


    The lady who used to run my Malaysian office greeted me one morning with the words "Can I quickly give you a heads up?" It didnt sound right.
  • edited October 2011
    "metrics" - What was wrong with targets/measures?   (although I plead guilty to using KPIs)
  • "metrics" - What was wrong with targets/measures?   (although I plead guilty to using KPIs)
    That's just your checklist mentality, Henry. You're probably template-driven as well.

    I know I am.
  • Not quite the same as annoying work sayings, but being called a client by your hairdresser. Pretentious nonsense.
    Don't get me started! When did "passengers" become "customers" on the railways?!
    At least with the railways you have some degree of choice.

    It's when the taxman starts referring to "customers" that really f**ks me off - like there's any choice involved in where I chose to provide my "custom" in that!
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  • Couldn't agree more - we're signing from the same hymn sheet Off_it!
  • "metrics" - What was wrong with targets/measures?   (although I plead guilty to using KPIs)
    Keep planning inanely?
  • Couldn't agree more - we're signing from the same hymn sheet Off_it!
    I'd start worrying if I was you then mate - I'm mental!
    ;o)
  • "metrics" - What was wrong with targets/measures?   (although I plead guilty to using KPIs)
    That's just your checklist mentality, Henry. You're probably template-driven as well.

    I know I am.
    Depends on which of my Belbin Hats I'm wearing

    As part of what I do is auditing and another bit assessing I need that process mapping element  in my skills set.   : - )
  • synergies
  • People overusing "essentially" pisses me off

    Essentially, it's put at the beginning of a sentence to allude that the person is dumbing down what they're about to say. It's bloody annoying.
  • synergies
    Important for 'connecting' with colleagues.

  • Anyone else wake up in a cold sweat when thinking about 'The Shadow of the Leader'?
  • Couldn't agree more - we're signing from the same hymn sheet Off_it!
    I'd start worrying if I was you then mate - I'm mental!
    ;o)
    What's happening? Why are those guys in white coats coming towards me with that strange jacket? Who's monitoring this site?!
  • Type Bullshit Bingo as a search in Google Pictures and start playing, it will definitely liven up any meetings.

     

    I used to work for a German company that worked for the European Union in all the EU languages and our internal language was English. Those meetings were especially good for playing Bullshit Bingo. 

     

     

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