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Advice needed - can't ask the wife

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  • go on Jeremy Kyle?
  • She moved to Belarus but did win the women's shot put the other night

    Now, THAT was an outright beast.

    Imagine waking up next to her? You'd probably have to marry her just to stay alive.
  • adrian said:

    ***WARNING***

    ***DANGEROUS TERRITORY ALERT***

    If it's something I wrote which is inappropriate, then I don't know the rules.
    no, I mean you are getting yourself in dangerous territory. This suggests you are not fully happy in your marriage, and you are hankering for a prior love / the one that got away. Remember, the grass is not always greener. If my assertion is correct, address your current situation first, mainly out of decency to your wife. If you then want to persue what you perceive to be your heart, then do so but be prepared for disappointment.

    If you are simply interested in catching up with an old flame for friendship, the tough. You can't, its too complicated.

    Of course, ignore all the above, you are your own man !

  • edited August 2012

    She moved to Belarus but did win the women's shot put the other night

    Now, THAT was an outright beast.

    Imagine waking up next to her? You'd probably have to marry her just to stay alive.
    Yes a monster, I think a fight and a fuck would amount to the same thing with that one! Luckily I assume she munches the rug!
  • Has the restraining order expired?
  • Afka is Jeremy Kyle
  • plenty of agony aunts and uncles on here.
  • Your answers lie between the pages of a Mills and Boon..........or maybe Razzle.
  • Do yourself a favour and avoid this like the plague. I did exactly the same a few years ago with a Welsh girl I met on a lads holiday and she had a whole load of grief from her husband and his family. Trust me, it ain't worth it for her nor you
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  • Curb_It said:

    lololol Southend.

    I'd leave it in the past Adrian. Well dont get you're hopes up as you might miss the coach anyway, if the coach driver doesnt look out his mirror to see any late passengers arriving.

    Beat me to it!
  • If you find her and she rejects you, will it end up in a siege?

    Gazza might turn up with a 6 pack, a kebab and some Nicky Clarke hair straighteners.

    Was it a kebab? I thought it was a roast chicken!!!
  • edited August 2012
    Okay - all you've had is personal advice - nothing on how to find her!
    So here's the trying to find her stuff without the agony aunt option!
    First try www.192.com. I think you have to register but you can search by name or by business type within the locality. Also, from that site you can undertake an electoral roll search (if she's registered to vote). Next, if she's set up a hairdressers as a registered company you could try a full name search under the company director search option on the Companies House web site. If you know her Mum's name, you could also try an electoral roll search for her Mum in that area, assuming she's just moved rather than died.
    I admit that the common surname does make it tricky and I guess she may have got married and the name's changed anyway.
    As well as Facebook - there's also the friends reunited site if you know the names of any of her mates.
    Try looking for hairdressers in a hairdresser's members association type thingy.
    If all else fails, there's always a private detective they have remarkable success at finding people - just ask News Corp!
  • No good will come of this
  • edited August 2012
    JT said:

    Edit. has to be a wind up

    i'm pretty sure i've read something like this before somewhere ,maybe even on here , i think he's on a wind up

    but i can't remember the ending !!
  • Exes are best left reserved to the wank bank.
    dont go searching for them - it wont be as good as what you remember.
  • 'create a chart with hairdressers in the middle and then related businesses nearest the centre (beauty salon) with the unrelated on the edge of the chart (butchers).'

    ------

    That is genius !
  • You say that her mum told you that she "intended" to open a hairdresser in Lytham St.Annes, so there's a chance she didn't and ended up working somewhere similar instead. I think the only sensible thing to do here is collate a list of every business in Lytham St.Annes and then create a chart with hairdressers in the middle and then related businesses nearest the centre (beauty salon) with the unrelated on the edge of the chart (butchers).

    Then plot a route aroundLytham St.Annes taking in every single business starting from the centre until you reach the outside. You may want to do this over a weekend. Tell your wife you're meeting your old mate Bill in while at Blackpool.

    Then if you still can't find her, do the same exercise in neighbouring towns. This of course may take you across the whole country so consider taking a loan from the bank and recruiting a team of people to scout the country for you without raising your wife's suspicions. If you do get found out you at least have the excuse you're helping the country's unemployment figures with your professional stalking team.

    Finally you should post her name on here because for all you know she remembers your love of Charlton and comes on CL every day hoping to see a post from you. This could be the first CL divorce/wedding, AFKA will need to get a hat!

    Also do a drawing of her (in crayon if you like) and print it out and post it around Lytham St.Annes on every lamp post until someone recognises themselves.

    When you look at it as I have describe above you'll see it's all really quite simple etcs.

    Outstanding - best laugh of the week. Especially 'in crayon if you like'. Thanks for that!
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  • oohaah could you ask in your barbers see if they know anything
  • Brilliant Leaburn!
  • Use Facebook (you need to see what she looks like first).
  • Lung u r spot on mate best just kept as a memory
  • The bloke's beem on here for a couple of years and in the past has admitted to being French and having had a colonoscopy. I reckon it's genuine.
  • or just use plentyoffish.com
  • edited August 2012
    can't beat LeaburnForEngland's advice (very funny) but do you remember the last place you saw her? If so, you could hire a bloodhound (unless you already own one or know somebody that does), take (let's call him) Bouncer to the place and see if he can pick up the scent. show the bloodhound an old picture of her if you have one which may also help. best of luck.
  • JT said:

    oohaah could you ask in your barbers see if they know anything

    ok in about a month (thats how long the lowlights last)
  • You getting the coach up to Blackpool?

    Tell the missus the buggers left you stranded again and you had to make alternative arrangements getting home. Might be able to squeeze a few days extra up there.
  • edited August 2012
    Bang out of order Leaburn.

    What makes you think a butcher's is unrelated to hairdressing?

    They both use sharp implements to sever body parts.
This discussion has been closed.

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