Blinking heck , my youngest lad turned 13 this month , and i don't know if someones pushed a button in him , but he's turned into a right stroppy git.
Mouthy, argumentative and answering back , i think i preferred him how he was , but know i have to love him for who he is , i'm sure i was just the same (Maybe some people on here .. maybe are still like that no doubt :-0 ) has anyone got any parenting tips of how they dealt with it , or where you a bit of a 'git' as a teenager , and what tips would have been good if they'd been applied?
http://www.parentdish.co.uk/2012/06/20/stroppy-teens-who-answer-back-turn-into-nicer-adults-says-research/ 
Comments
I don't have kids this is just my opinion.
I find doing exaggerated impressions straight back at them makes them feel ridiculous and usually gets a laugh. Of course, sometimes it just makes things worse...
Firstly it demonstrated that they were not frightened to express their views to me.
Secondly when I challenged them on those views it made them think and some (not all!) of the time they would decide for themselves to take my preferred course of action.
It was certainly draining and there were times I would rather do something else other than engage in what were often pointless circular debates. However I think it helped my daughters develop into confident, assertive women who can now stick up for themselves rather more effectively than I could at a similar age.
Ultimately as a parent, in my opinion, the needs of your children come before your own needs so it's something you need to go through.
Probably not what you want to hear!
If you've a girl, she'll scream that she hates you, burst into tears and slam her bedroom door in your face.
And you only asked if they'd finished their homework.
Also brought her a mug which had this written on:
Teenagers
Are you tired of being harassed by your stupid parents?
Act now, move out, get a jobs and pay your own bills- while you still know everything.
*Sorry wrong thread*
Also I think with boys (more so than girls) you have to find things for them to do and not leave it up to them to please themselves. Sport is great for this.
Basically, tire them out so that when they are do nothing they are sleeping, they can have the stropps then.
i sometimes chase him and then pin him down until he apologises. he never does but it diffuses the situation.
failing that, shower him with presents until he snaps out of it.
Or do like Josef Fritzel (except without the raping and associated other bad stuff of course).
I like to think it wouldn't but I'll never know whether my attitude described above would have differed with a stroppy boy.
Hope this advice helps MIA ?
- Talk with your partner about how you are going to deal with matters, agree a general approach.
- Don't go for the good cop bad cop routine; the "wait 'til your father gets home" approach is just asking for trouble. Both parents need to deal with things consistently as they arise.
- Reward good behaviour. This doesn't mean that you have to buy them stuff all the time though. Tell them that you love them and that you are proud of them.
- Avoid making comparisons with siblings, it will breed resentment.
- When you want something done, explain why. The Nike approach does't cut any ice.
- If they stomp off in a sulk, don't go chasing after them.
- Any punishments should be as close to the 'crime' as possible. Month long groundings will breed more resentment - ideally any punishments should be over in a day.
- Don't give over the top punishment - be measured.
- Only threaten to do what you can actually carry out and if you do set a punishment don't back down, go through with it.