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If you have lost a cherished pet; would appreciate your advice

We've just been told that our beloved golden Labbie has terminal cancer. It has come out of the blue. He will be 12 in April so we always knew he hasn't got so long. But he seemed to be fine until two days ago. Some people will say it is only a pet but I am sure many of you have been through this, so any advice would be most welcome. The worst thing is that we have been unable to have children. His is the third beating heart in our house, and he held us together when other bad things hit us and we were in danger of splitting up.

We do not know how long he has yet; we will know more on Monday; so I am sure some of you good people will have advice which will help us prepare.

Thank you in advance.
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Comments

  • Sorry to hear that Prague
  • edited January 2014
    Very sorry to hear that news Prague. It might sound a bit callous but I know that what helped me and many others in the past is to get a new dog soon. You will grieve and miss your old dog terribly but having a new puppy will help give you a more positive focus. And as he/her grows up, is trained and develops it's own personality you will see some similarities and some differences with your existing dog that will bring back great memories and the smiles. Sounds like you love your dog very much and I have no doubt that he has had a very happy life with you and your wife/partner - that is something to remember and cherish.
  • Sorry to hear that... I had to take the cat to be put down a couple of weeks ago. It's was really difficult, but apparently the animal prefers you to be there when they give the injection, as they look for their owner otherwise. I guess it's just a case of taking the time to grieve. You'll know when it's time to get another... Might be straight away or after a while
  • It is hard. You gave him the best life possible I'm sure, and will have many memories to treasure. That won't make grieving easier but it can help come to terms with events. Take things step by step, stay as rational as possible in decision making then when the worst happens the only thing that can help is time unfortunately.

    I had a Siamese cat when I was younger (named Sasa), he was diagnosed with cancer and in hindsight his life was prolonged for too long. That was a little selfish on our part, he wasn't having any fun in life save for tired cuddles. When they stop doing little things that make them them you do have to start thinking about the last visit to the vets. It is horrible but in the long run it's for the better.
  • I lost my bulldog in May. I'm not gonna lie it's still hurting now, more than people know. I know exactly how u feel and there's nothing anyone will do or say to make it feel better. I lost him at the age of 8 due to the vets which made it even harder as he was in good health. I think about him every day and I have some very bad days. My only advice is spend as much time as u can with him, get some photos together, video clips as they all help. Make the most of your time. Just remember the good times and how much love u have given him.

    Look up the poem rainbow bridge
  • That's sad news Prague, i really feel for you. The only advice i can give is listen to the vet, they really do know best. We have lost three lovely dogs to cancer over the years, unfortunately dogs rarely die they normally have to be helped into the next world. We have their ashes buried in our garden with a small plaque above. Chin up mate.
  • oh dear the Lass and I do feel for you both as we are without children and have had 4 dogs over the years with the 4th now 10. Our retriever Abbie died about 8 years ago after a long illness and we just didn't know when her end would be. She stayed happy and semi-mobile until one morning she just lay there and looked at us and we knew the time had come to have her put to sleep. We had a younger dog as well and took her with us to the vets. Abbie was given her injection and fell asleep, we then let our other dog see her so he knew not to look for her, We had Abbie cremated and her ashes are in a flower pot with some soil and a beautiful rose grows there.

    Good luck and remember the good times you've had over the past 12 years.
  • Stick with him as long as he's still got a decent quality of life. But don't give in to temptation and let it drag on too long - for all of your sakes. It will only cause more hurt in the long run.

    Good luck.
  • @pragueaddick.....this is never an easy time and my heart goes out to you. Mrs RM and myself have now been through this 4 times in the last 10 years (you may know we breed GSD's and keep some of them), we also do not have children so I can relate to you on that level also. The hardest thing to do is make the ultimate decision, and by god I can tell you it hurts like mad, BUT in the end you need to remember the good times you had with your dog, the joy he brought, the times he made you mad and the times he was just so....well doggy I suppose. You need to tell yourself that he will be better the other side of 'rainbow bridge' (I'll try and publish that on here for you). He has been a loyal companion and now it is your time to do the right thing for him and not let him suffer. I can PM if you want on how Mrs RM and myself went through the final days or if your happy for me to put that on the open forum let me know. We are here for you, and though we have never met we want to help if we can.
  • The Rainbow Bridge

    By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,
    Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
    Where the friends of man and woman do run,
    When their time on earth is over and done.

    For here, between this world and the next,
    Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
    On this golden land, they wait and they play,
    Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

    No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
    For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
    Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
    Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

    They romp through the grass, without even a care,
    Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
    All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
    Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.

    For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
    Together again, both person and pet.
    So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
    The time of their parting is over at last.

    The sadness they felt while they were apart,
    Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
    They embrace with a love that will last forever,
    And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.

    I've lifted this from our website....I hope it helps in some small way.
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  • I lost my 24 year old cat a few years ago, so he was even older then I am. It was like losing a family member. Still upsets me now but like everything you have to try your best too move on.

    On the plus side, all I have is happy memories.


    I appreciate a cat is a little different to a dog, but I still liked him!!
  • Thank you all for your words. Red, I will PM you, thank you for your offer.
  • Sorry to hear this. We lost a golden retriever a few years ago, which absolutely broke our hearts.

    We got another dog, same breed, within 12 months and it certainly helped. My advise would be to give it a bit of time, then look into doing something similar.
  • very sorry to hear that PA , when I lost JJ my staffie I was gutted and it stung like feck, I only had him over a year so I cant imagine how 12 would feel

    id def take a bit of time to feel and grieve but then get another dog it may be an idea to go down the rescue route
  • So sorry to hear this Prague, as some on here know we nearly made a decision to let Bailey go last year. We were in bits at the time and fortunately the problem when finally diagnosed was curable. Before he came along I was very firmly in the "it's only a dog" camp but as you say they are more than that...................... How would I deal with it? We were making plans to fill the void potentially left by Bailey by reserving a puppy not to replace him, nothing would replace him had we let him go, but keep us busy and occupy our and especially my time. I will still get a puppy (possibly this year) but now to work alongside Bailey. Whatever you decide and I'm guessing you've had 12 fantastic years which as you say is a good age, and when the time comes cherish the memory's.
  • Having had to have both cats and dogs put down I know how hard it is. If it come to euthenasia I would consider where you do it. I've experienced it at the vets before and would never do it there again. A few months ago we had to have our cat put to sleep and again chose to have the vet come to the house. It cost us an extra £90 but being able to sit comfortably in his favourite chair with him on my lap meant everything to me. For me it's when we go to the next life, but how. At home it can afford both you and your loved little one some dignity. I we have buried all our own pets, including our own golden Labrador. At home suited us, but i'd advise to go with whatever sits right with you. I'm welling up just thinking about it all again. My heart goes out to you matey. I lost our daughter two years again so know how tough it is to feel loss, but you will pull through. With pets I'd always advise to get another that will be loved just as much, you'll see for yourself.
  • It is terribly hard decision to make but you have to do the best for your pet, it comes down to quality of life. I completely understand they are not just an animal and a huge part of the family ( I have always had cats) people who don't have them don't understand. Someone said that they were with their pet when they were out to sleep, I have done that with 2 cats, it is incredibly hard but I am glad I was with them to comfort them at the end and if you can do it at home I would recommend it too as it will be less stressful for your pet. In time you can get another dog and begin a new chapter in your family life. Good Luck, be strong.
  • cafcfred4 said:

    I lost my 24 year old cat a few years ago, so he was even older then I am. It was like losing a family member. Still upsets me now but like everything you have to try your best too move on.

    On the plus side, all I have is happy memories.


    I appreciate a cat is a little different to a dog, but I still liked him!!


    A cat is no different to a dog - still a loved pet! But loosing a cat after 24 yrs must be very hard he must have had a very lovely life
  • I had my Labbie put to sleep two years ago and she was 16

    Like others have said you'll know when the time is right

    Good luck
  • We've just been told that our beloved golden Labbie has terminal cancer. It has come out of t
    he blue. He will be 12 in April so we always knew he hasn't got so long. But he seemed to be fine until two days ago. Some people will say it is only a pet but I am sure many of you have been through this, so any advice would be most welcome. The worst thing is that we have been unable to have children. His is the third beating heart in our house, and he held us together when other bad things hit us and we were in danger of splitting up.

    We do not know how long he has yet; we will know more on Monday; so I am sure some of you good people will have advice which will help us prepare.

    Thank you in advance.

    Get hold of something called CV247 and put him on an organic diet. Our JR cross was given 1 month with lymphoma. He was really sick and at 14 too old for the standard cancer treatment but the CV247 gave him almost immediate relief and 6 months of normal life.
    Would not hesitate to use it again.
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  • Dogs are wonderful creatures with their own personalities and you have to make the right decisions for the wellbeing of your beloved pet. I think when he passes, you should not waste too much time in getting a puppy. You wont forget or stop loving your old pet but you will have responsibilities to the new one that will help you.
  • We've just been told that our beloved golden Labbie has terminal cancer. It has come out of t
    he blue. He will be 12 in April so we always knew he hasn't got so long. But he seemed to be fine until two days ago. Some people will say it is only a pet but I am sure many of you have been through this, so any advice would be most welcome. The worst thing is that we have been unable to have children. His is the third beating heart in our house, and he held us together when other bad things hit us and we were in danger of splitting up.

    We do not know how long he has yet; we will know more on Monday; so I am sure some of you good people will have advice which will help us prepare.

    Thank you in advance.

    Get hold of something called CV247 and put him on an organic diet. Our JR cross was given 1 month with lymphoma. He was really sick and at 14 too old for the standard cancer treatment but the CV247 gave him almost immediate relief and 6 months of normal life.
    Would not hesitate to use it again.
    That is a great tip, we will certainly look it up. Our dog's cancer is in the lung though and has spread. But we sure as hell will look into it

  • edited January 2014

    We've just been told that our beloved golden Labbie has terminal cancer. It has come out of t
    he blue. He will be 12 in April so we always knew he hasn't got so long. But he seemed to be fine until two days ago. Some people will say it is only a pet but I am sure many of you have been through this, so any advice would be most welcome. The worst thing is that we have been unable to have children. His is the third beating heart in our house, and he held us together when other bad things hit us and we were in danger of splitting up.

    We do not know how long he has yet; we will know more on Monday; so I am sure some of you good people will have advice which will help us prepare.

    Thank you in advance.

    Get hold of something called CV247 and put him on an organic diet. Our JR cross was given 1 month with lymphoma. He was really sick and at 14 too old for the standard cancer treatment but the CV247 gave him almost immediate relief and 6 months of normal life.
    Would not hesitate to use it again.
    That is a great tip, we will certainly look it up. Our dog's cancer is in the lung though and has spread. But we sure as hell will look into it


    I don't recall the specific nature of the cancer being a factor when the vet told us about it and I'm pretty sure the lymphoma had spread to our dog's liver.
    We had a great vet in Coney Hall (sadly retired now) who recommended it instead of the standard cancer treatment options, not that he was against those but he and we thought it wasn't fair on our dog at his age. We braced ourselves for it not to work (the vet said roughly a quarter of dogs didn't seem to respond to it [though he'd never known any to have adverse side effects] but most saw meaningful relief and extension of life and he'd even seen some go into remission).
    Our dog was much better within a day or so but, from the start, we said to ourselves that the moment he went backwards we would say goodbye and not put him through any recurrence of his illness. It was still heart-breaking when the moment came 6 months later. Like you we have no kids and he was our first pet - had him from Foal Farm as a 2 year old and though we've got 2 other rescues now, 3 years later we both still get teary thinking about dear old Basil. However, that we were able to cherish every day he was "well" and with us and for so much longer than the original prognosis was something we were and still are immensely grateful for.
    If you google CV247 (I guess you have already), you'll find people have differing experiences with it and have different advice about the diet to accompany it. The food regime is very important but we didn't go the raw route (just wasn't his cup of tea) but gave him a purely organic diet, using a readily available dog food - Lily's Kitchen in our case.
    You may find the link interesting if you haven't come across it already.
    Whatever you decide to do, very best wishes Prague.

    http://holisticvet.co.uk/index.php/cv247/
  • You made me go and hug my dog for a good half hour.

    I can't imagine how you're feeling Prague, just try your best to enjoy the time you guys have
  • It really is a difficult decision, one we had to make just before Christmas with our 16 year old cat who after being diagnosed in august with diabetes developed a mouth tumour which we discovered December. He's sadly no longer with us, but making the decision to have him put down and explaining to our 12 and 10 year olds was the hardest thing I've ever done.

    We couldnt watch him suffer, and as he'd started to go off his food knew it was only going one way. But don't envy anyone having to make that choice.
  • Dear all.

    I would just like to thank you all, from both of us, for your thoughts and advice. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. I will update the thread with info on any remedies we try, so that it will be useful for others who face this in the future. I will stay in touch with some of you privately too as appropriate, and of course will welcome any other comments.

    And thanks again to AFKA and Lookie for creating a "football" forum where people are so generous with their support and advice on much "heavier" issues.

    Cheers

    PA

  • Not sure that I can add much to this, but more concur with what has been said. We're on our 4th dog now. Of the previous 3 the first died at 16, surprised she lived that long considering her poor start to life (she was a rescue as have been our others). The next two had to be helped into the next life. It's heartbreaking but as has been said, sometimes we can leave it a little too long before we make the decision and we certainly did with our 3rd. Also, the house felt so empty that with all our best intentions we dived in fairly quickly for another dog. It helped immensely. We both get upset when we think of our previous dogs but having another eased the pain.

    Prague, it seems you have a little time on your side and the advice re CV247 seems worthwhile. I hope that things improve in the short term.


  • Our 14 year old Welsh Terrier has cancer of the bladder, diagnosed about 3 months ago. She still loves her food and is still (relatively!) mobile, although she can't manage a proper long walk anymore. She has some pain relief, she is getting extra strokes and we are preparing ourselves for the day when we have to make the dreaded final trip to the vets. It's an easier decision than you might think, you'll know when. (We had to do the same with our first Dalmation, and lo and behold we went and got another one-now 7).
  • Growing up we had an Irish wolfhound that we have had since I was about three. We got her a rescue centre and she was part of the family. She had a couple of the bouts of cancer and we managed to get through them. I have no idea how much my father spent keeping her alive.

    When she finally passed away I was about 18 and I was a complete mess.

    We got a new dog before she was gone and this helped to keep her going and gave her a new lease of life. That's not to say this would happen for you however it then make it easier to you still had somebody to look after.

  • Hi Prague,

    Truly sorry to hear your news
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