At Stratford station a couple of years ago and overhead two Americans getting very cross with a guy who was trying to explain to them that Shakespeare's house wasn't in London.
When I was on holiday in Costa Rica some years ago I bumped into a guy in a bar.
Turns out he was from LA and a music agent of some sort with a few clients under his wing. One of the clients was a guy I went to school with - Ed Simons (The Chemical Brothers (Dust Brothers perhaps at the time I think)).
When I was on holiday in Costa Rica some years ago I bumped into a guy in a bar.
Turns out he was from LA and a music agent of some sort with a few clients under his wing. One of the clients was a guy I went to school with - Ed Simons (The Chemical Brothers (Dust Brothers perhaps at the time I think)).
Bumped into a guy (a music agent) in a bar in Costa Rica? Hmmm...
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
I remember being in New York, I was was asked where I lived and I replied "London" to which she said "oh, I know someone lives near there, in Manchester"!! She then went on to say her name in a "do you know her" way...!
I suppose with how vast USA is that Manhester is relatively close to London to be fair!
I have had that about Guildford when I was living in Hull and the "do you know ...."
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
why else do you go on the tredmills facing the mirror at the gym??
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
A few years ago I moved from Eastbourne to North Lincolnshire. A local said to me that he had a friend who lived down south in Plymouth, did I know him?
I was in Florida years ago and had the least likely conversation with a most definitely local, American waiter. It went like this:
'So, were are you guys from?
'London.'
'Yeah, but whereabouts.'
'South London. A place called Lewisham. You wouldn't have heard of it.'
'Sure I have. Have they finished the DLR at Lewisham Station yet?'
I absolutely kid you not. Turns out his son lived in Lewisham. But it's the way he replied. It wasn't, 'Whoah. You're kidding me? What are the chances?' Didn't even sound surprised.
I think Lewisham made it when Millwall were sponsored by the council in the late 80s. Such a good advert for tourism, inward investment and the people
I was in Florida years ago and had the least likely conversation with a most definitely local, American waiter. It went like this:
'So, were are you guys from?
'London.'
'Yeah, but whereabouts.'
'South London. A place called Lewisham. You wouldn't have heard of it.'
'Sure I have. Have they finished the DLR at Lewisham Station yet?'
I absolutely kid you not. Turns out his son lived in Lewisham. But it's the way he replied. It wasn't, 'Whoah. You're kidding me? What are the chances?' Didn't even sound surprised.
When I travel to the US for work I'm always surprised by how much they actually know about London compared to what the stereotypes would have you believe.
I was getting a coffee before heading into the office in Boston one morning, and I was educating my boss about Charlton and how I watch them home and away etc, when the guy in front hears me talking about Football he says "who are your team?" I replied "Oh, a small team in South East London where I grew up called Charlton."
He then astonished me by saying "Yeah I know Charlton, I remember you used to be in the Premier League and you had Jonathan Spector playing for you".
He then went went on to ask me about what I think about West Ham moving into the OIympic Stadium and winding up Leyton Orient fans!
a lot of Americans and (especially) Canadians I meet and have met know central London far better than I do .. a New Yorker friend of mine has been to London, Paris, Rome, Athens, Madrid, all over Europe in fact, many times but has never been further west in the USA than New Jersey, he has never been 'next door' to Boston .. 'what's the point' he says, 'New York is THE American city, California is a foreign land'
Slightly off topic.... ......Half of my family have lived in the States for over 50 years, so I have cousins, second cousins etc. They not really thick but shall we say naive. A couple of my stateside cousins have been trying to trace our family history and I have had great fun winding them up, There is an Earl who has the same surname as them and I have had great pleasure in telling them that he is a close relative from about 3 generations ago, and fathered a bastard child (our grandfather), subsequently cast out of the family. I even sent them a link to the 'family' coat of arms crest. They have told people via FaceBook etc that they are British aristocracy. I don't have the heart to put them right ;o)
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
Genuinely overheard on the train from Abbey Wood to Charlton a couple of saturday's ago. " Where is Charlton ? Is it in Charlton? " Even his mates in the blue shirts laughed at that one.
Went to Ireland and my dad got talking to two Americans who asked if we had gotten there from London via train.
Although this lady doesn't have the excuse of being American..
So predictable.
You're right, American stupidity is pretty predictable, I don't know how you deal with it everyday.
There's stupidity everywhere, no more in the US than anywhere else.
back in 2009 me and my mates stopped off in camden town before heading off to hyde park to go see Blur. Sat next to a north american in the food area where there were benches who turned out to be the head of animation at dreamworks and was on holiday here with his daughter. He knew where kent was and asked if we knew gravesend as he had family there. He's actually Canadian but what the hey, he's spent most of his life in LA and he was extremely polite to a 3 stoned teenagers so I'll use it as a story to defend americans.
There's a lot of americans in the world which obviously means there's more stupid americans as a result.
A few years ago in New York, I was asked by a local where I was from. Without thinking I simply replied Gravesend, (realising only afterwards that he's obviously not going to know a town in England).
He replied "Oh really, Well, I'm going that way soon, I'll give you a ride home if you like".
Now I realise petrol is cheaper over there, but thought this was a very kind gesture and totally unnecessary, as I was planning on staying for a week longer.
At that point I learnt there is a Gravesend south of Brooklyn and he found out that I lived in the south of England.
Education all round. Everyone's a winner................
At Stratford station a couple of years ago and overhead two Americans getting very cross with a guy who was trying to explain to them that Shakespeare's house wasn't in London.
A friend of a friend, who is in her thirties and ought to know better, thinks 'The King and I' was written by Shakespeare. And she's English.
At Stratford station a couple of years ago and overhead two Americans getting very cross with a guy who was trying to explain to them that Shakespeare's house wasn't in London.
A friend of a friend, who is in her thirties and ought to know better, thinks 'The King and I' was written by Shakespeare. And she's English.
Wow. How stoopid. Elvis wasn't even alive in Shakespeare's time. Anyone knows that.
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
Evidently you have, Soapy.
Thanks for sharing that!
Six weeks detention and banned from sports day at the girls school for two years..
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
Ridiculous. Have you ever tried wanking at running pace? It's not easy!
Evidently you have, Soapy.
Thanks for sharing that!
Six weeks detention and banned from sports day at the girls school for two years..
No wonder they sent you away to the west of Scotland!
On holiday in Egypt, just been on a trip to visit the Muhammad Ali mosque. Got back on the bus and, you guessed it, heard the bloke behind me say to his girlfriend 'no, that's not the same person'.
Boston Aquarium and dad with son studying world map. 'Pop, what's that big island on the bottom right?' Dad hesitates and mumbles 'Australia'
'Ok pop, and what are the two islands further south east of Australia?'. Dad is completely panic stricken and turns to his wife, 'honey, is that Cape Horn?'
Comments
Turns out he was from LA and a music agent of some sort with a few clients under his wing. One of the clients was a guy I went to school with - Ed Simons (The Chemical Brothers (Dust Brothers perhaps at the time I think)).
I work in Camden and I was walking along Regent's Canal one lunchtime when I saw a very attractive blonde jogging with a male jogging partner, and this is what he said to her as they jogged past:
'Have you ever thought about having sex in front of strangers?'
It haunts me to this day that I didn't leg it after them so I could hear her answer.
- Do you have Facebook in Africa?
- I have a mate in Kenya, Richard, do you know him?
And my favourite
If you from South Africa why aren't you black?
Sorry lads not just the Yanks who can seem daft!
......Half of my family have lived in the States for over 50 years, so I have cousins, second cousins etc. They not really thick but shall we say naive. A couple of my stateside cousins have been trying to trace our family history and I have had great fun winding them up, There is an Earl who has the same surname as them and I have had great pleasure in telling them that he is a close relative from about 3 generations ago, and fathered a bastard child (our grandfather), subsequently cast out of the family. I even sent them a link to the 'family' coat of arms crest.
They have told people via FaceBook etc that they are British aristocracy. I don't have the heart to put them right ;o)
Thanks for sharing that!
He said, 'Excuse me, do you were the nearest fish and chip shop is?'
I pointed and said, 'Yeah, it's just over there.'
He replied, 'How many blocks is that?'
I pointed again and said, 'It's there, over the road.'
He said again, 'But how many blocks is that?'
I said, 'Mate. It's over there. I'm pointing at it.'
Then he started getting angry. 'Don't you know what a block is? How many blocks away is it? I'm asking you a simple question.'
I said, 'I DUNNO. 750 MILLION BLOCKS? ITS THERE. RIGHT IN F*CKING FRONT OF YOU!'
" Where is Charlton ? Is it in Charlton? " Even his mates in the blue shirts laughed at that one.
He replied "Oh really, Well, I'm going that way soon, I'll give you a ride home if you like".
Now I realise petrol is cheaper over there, but thought this was a very kind gesture and totally unnecessary, as I was planning on staying for a week longer.
At that point I learnt there is a Gravesend south of Brooklyn and he found out that I lived in the south of England.
Education all round. Everyone's a winner................
'Ok pop, and what are the two islands further south east of Australia?'. Dad is completely panic stricken and turns to his wife, 'honey, is that Cape Horn?'