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Best "Resignations"

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  • Some great stories on here. Thanks so much everyone you have definitely cheered me up! Starting the hunt for a new job today!
  • ashley said:

    Some years ago I worked at a large firm and at the start of my career .It was owned and run in the main by middle aged ,middle classed white men who had been to " school ,school and Oxbridge " - prep school , public school and either an Oxford or Cambridge College - and to the extent that there were any women in control they were the same only they suffered worse dandruff .They played lip service to concepts of social mobility ,anti- elitism and discrimination but generally they were odious "Class Nazis ". None more so than one person in particular - let's call him Clark as funnily enough that was his name - whom I had the misfortune to work for directly for six months on a big " action " and who could be fairly described as a rude ,bullying and anatomically repulsive institutionalised monster. Relations with him were made worse because his very attractive PSG ( public school girl ) girl friend flirted with me at a firm Christmas Party to such an extent ,and to his jaw dropping horror and public humiliation that my career there was in consequence pretty much over before it had really begun .So I had to get another job with a rival firm quite quickly as he made my life a misery afterwards from New Year to the Spring when my notice expired .On the Friday that I departed - he was not in the office - I went down to see the guys in the general office responsible for internal mail deliveries and who hated this bloke almost as much as me .I had picked up one of those orange internal mail packets that you can write people's initials on and that ,given the number of boxes printed on the exterior ,gets circulated about thirty times together with its contents before it is binned .I had written his initials on it and marked it " strictly private and confidential to be opened by addressee only" . I had also defecated into a small plasic bag placed inside it .They made sure that it was hand delivered to him on the Monday after sitting in the sun on a window ledge in the general office and after a long hot weekend .whilst my leaving do had occured ,and I had long gone by then ,I received numerous reports from people about his tirades and threats after having placed his hand deep into the contents to scoop out what had been presented to him to open that Monday morning .He must have been cleaning out his finger nails with a bent paper clip for days afterwards ! Despite his suspicions no one ever dropped me in it - despite what I had dropped myself - and one further unexpected and welcome twist was that his girlfriend ( soon to become ex girlfriend ) turned out a while later to be a rattlingly good shag .All's well that ends well I suppose .

    Stop the clocks, we have a winner
  • edited September 2016
    After some advice, please, from the knowledgeable souls of CL.

    I handed in my notice last Friday.

    I'm meant to give a week as I've been here under two years. They asked me to work two weeks while they found someone else and I accepted, so my last day is the 16th.

    Am I entitled to be paid for this month on the 16th or is it the usual payday (last Friday of the month)?

    Thanks.
  • In my experience pay day remains the same. You'll get two weeks money (plus/minus adjustments for holiday pay etc) on your usual pay day. They wont do a mid-month pay run just for you.
  • IdleHans said:

    In my experience pay day remains the same. You'll get two weeks money (plus/minus adjustments for holiday pay etc) on your usual pay day. They wont do a mid-month pay run just for you.

    Ta.
  • After some advice, please, from the knowledgeable souls of CL.

    I handed in my notice last Friday.

    I'm meant to give a week as I've been here under two years. They asked me to work two weeks while they found someone else and I accepted, so my last day is the 16th.

    Am I entitled to be paid for this month on the 16th or is it the usual payday (last Friday of the month)?

    Thanks.

    You must have a good story about how you resigned surely?
  • After some advice, please, from the knowledgeable souls of CL.

    I handed in my notice last Friday.

    I'm meant to give a week as I've been here under two years. They asked me to work two weeks while they found someone else and I accepted, so my last day is the 16th.

    Am I entitled to be paid for this month on the 16th or is it the usual payday (last Friday of the month)?

    Thanks.

    You must have a good story about how you resigned surely?
    I do mate.

    It got 19 lols on page 4.

    Trust me, it's a good'un...
  • After some advice, please, from the knowledgeable souls of CL.

    I handed in my notice last Friday.

    I'm meant to give a week as I've been here under two years. They asked me to work two weeks while they found someone else and I accepted, so my last day is the 16th.

    Am I entitled to be paid for this month on the 16th or is it the usual payday (last Friday of the month)?

    Thanks.

    You must have a good story about how you resigned surely?
    I do mate.

    It got 19 lols on page 4.

    Trust me, it's a good'un...
    image
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  • After some advice, please, from the knowledgeable souls of CL.

    I handed in my notice last Friday.

    I'm meant to give a week as I've been here under two years. They asked me to work two weeks while they found someone else and I accepted, so my last day is the 16th.

    Am I entitled to be paid for this month on the 16th or is it the usual payday (last Friday of the month)?

    Thanks.

    You must have a good story about how you resigned surely?
    I do mate.

    It got 19 lols on page 4.

    Trust me, it's a good'un...
    27, page 2
  • Big Sam's just negotiated a £400k resignation (allegedly)
  • Congratulations on getting a new job with a small baby food company.
    Did you point out that all babies are small?

    Haha the company is pretty much at that kind of state the obvious level. They don't even know how much it costs them to produce one unit of their product haha!
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