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Tight fisted gits
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Tightness is a really really nasty traight
That said, always listen to financial advice from tight pricks. There is a guy I work with who leaves a bucket under the dripping bathroom tap (deliberately turned to drip, not run) as the water meter doesn't register it. He does this every night, fills the toilet cistern up and only let's his family flush the thing once they've all been for a gauge. This bloke is rarely wrong with financial matters even if I'd rather suck a queef out of Dianne Abbott than share a drink with him
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We are acquaintances not friends
Probably barely acquaintances now, but he is boycotting
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Probably stopped going as you're chasing him for dough.Covered End said:We are acquaintances not friends
Probably barely acquaintances now, but he is boycotting0 -
Any reason why this thread doesn't show 'it's read'? When I click into it, it always reverts to the first page? this might change now i've posted on it.
brilliant thread. had me chuckling at some of the stories.
I have a person at work that avoids a round - we buy a bottle at a time, but when our glasses are empty she says 'i'm going to go in a minute' so I then say that i'm staying for more and she mysteriously stays for another glass. I feel she also purposely orders more sides to go with whatever main and the most expensive dish when we go out for dinner as a small group and then is the first to suggest splitting the bill.0 -
I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.0 -
Can’t stand people who insist on going through the bill and paying only for what they ordered.
also don’t think equally splitting the bill always works as quite often I spend twice as much in booze as mot of the rest of the table combined.
so my answer is to just be reasonable about it an I generally slightly overpay and then everyone else feels like they’ve got a bit of a touch and don’t complain about splitting the balance.
With most people it evens out in the end. Some are net takers on the cash front and you have to decide if they’re worth it. I think you generally work that out fairly quickly.
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If you're all having something around the same price then split the bill evenly but if someone is having something much more expensive then let them pay their own and split the rest.
Same with the drinks, you all drinking beer and the other person wants champagne.
Any decent person would offer to do this unless they're freeloading.
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I don't care if people split the bill evenly or work it out, the thing that really annoys me is when people say "we'll get a selection of dishes and share them", or worse still suggest sharing food after the orders are made.6
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There's been a number of stories on here about claiming expenses, so here's mine. It's not about being tight, but I think its worth mentioning. Some years ago, I was asked by my boss to go out with a senior trade union official and talk to him about launching a major redundancy plan. I took one of our Ops Managers with me and we met the guy in a pub near Waterloo. I set up a tab and we set off on a four-hour "business meeting", this involved all three of us drinking Stella. About an hour before we were going to set off for a curry, another bloke from work joined us and had a couple of pints of Carling. I got the itemised bill, which was about three feet long and consisted of 33 pints of Stella and two Carlings. I submitted it as part of my expense claim and thought no more of it. However, about a week later my boss called me into his office and just held the bill out in front of me. I asked him what was wrong and got the reply, "who was the wanker on the Carling".34
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssv-jSSoI7IStig said:I don't care if people split the bill evenly or work it out, the thing that really annoys me is when people say "we'll get a selection of dishes and share them", or worse still suggest sharing food after the orders are made.
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Just come across this thread for the first time.
I feel personally attacked.
My mate deliberately underpaid me by 2p to repay me for plane tickets for a stag do and it drove me nuts. He's my oldest and best mate, but he never pays a tip at any restaurant he eats at and goes out of his way to have it taken off the bill - especially if he knows its a place he's never going to be back to if he's just visiting the area etc.1 -
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.0 -
FFS, some of you are right whingers.
It's a mate, so what if he doesn't pull his weight on a round or at a meal? He may struggle financially, he may be a bit tight, but he's a mate. None of us are perfect and I expect he puts up with our little foibles. Can't believe how many of you bother to 'count' how many drinks you've bought each other.
If I could pay for everything every time I went out with mates, then I would. None of my mates would allow me to do that (apart from probably @Henry Irving). Because they're mates.
So you spend more money than them, so what?
Build a bridge and get over it.
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The thing is, Addickted, you had three beers and a starter and I only had a main and tap water2
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I know it was on the advert, but people here we were once friends with (a husband and wife, and her sister. Strange set up, I know) would split the bill reflecting exactly what they had - the one time I remember, was in a burger type restaurant where we met them for a catch up, the husband and wife had one drink and her sister 2, so they sat there looking at the menu, trying to work it out. They were in a state of shock for about 6 months, when we settled the whole bill in an up market restaurant, to say thank you for doing something for us. Oh, and these people own and run a posh wedding venue0
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john said:There's been a number of stories on here about claiming expenses, so here's mine. It's not about being tight, but I think its worth mentioning. Some years ago, I was asked by my boss to go out with a senior trade union official and talk to him about launching a major redundancy plan. I took one of our Ops Managers with me and we met the guy in a pub near Waterloo. I set up a tab and we set off on a four-hour "business meeting", this involved all three of us drinking Stella. About an hour before we were going to set off for a curry, another bloke from work joined us and had a couple of pints of Carling. I got the itemised bill, which was about three feet long and consisted of 33 pints of Stella and two Carlings. I submitted it as part of my expense claim and thought no more of it. However, about a week later my boss called me into his office and just held the bill out in front of me. I asked him what was wrong and got the reply, "who was the wanker on the Carling".
Reminded me a bit of the time my manager called me in to query an expense claim, dinner for 14, "why did you pay for this, not the most senior manager present ?" Me "we spoofed for it, I lost", him "plonker, fair enough" chuckled and signed it off
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Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.0 -
I can't generally afford to do it too often, but on the odd occasion we do go out, we can usually afford the extra couple of quid to split it, even if the people we're with have a more expensive option. I don't think I've ever been in the company of someone who skips the starters, everyone has the full coursesiainment said:
Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.1 -
"Pete's already eyeing up my bhunas" - genius. Worth a like and a lol.muppetman said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssv-jSSoI7IStig said:I don't care if people split the bill evenly or work it out, the thing that really annoys me is when people say "we'll get a selection of dishes and share them", or worse still suggest sharing food after the orders are made.2 -
If it’s a couple of quid I don’t mind. But if it’s a tenner or more I do. I’m not on my uppers but money is tight for me and I can’t afford to sub a sponger.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I can't generally afford to do it too often, but on the odd occasion we do go out, we can usually afford the extra couple of quid to split it, even if the people we're with have a more expensive option. I don't think I've ever been in the company of someone who skips the starters, everyone has the full coursesiainment said:
Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.1 - Sponsored links:
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This bloke trying to pay 10p for charity box biscuits:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leeds-58904606
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The Verve - you're a slave to money then you die.
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Restaurants are a minefield especially if some are non drinkersiainment said:
If it’s a couple of quid I don’t mind. But if it’s a tenner or more I do. I’m not on my uppers but money is tight for me and I can’t afford to sub a sponger.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I can't generally afford to do it too often, but on the odd occasion we do go out, we can usually afford the extra couple of quid to split it, even if the people we're with have a more expensive option. I don't think I've ever been in the company of someone who skips the starters, everyone has the full coursesiainment said:
Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.
Even with family, although usually with us it is people trying to pay more
Was out last weekend:
Me, wife , two kids under 10
Brother in law and sister in law
Brother in law, sister in law and two kids 14 + 17
Mother in law
Brother in law and sister in law say just split 3 ways.
we say not fair as only two of you
Other brother in law says but your kids only had kids meals
we say but your wife was only drinking tap water
Mother in law says just let me know how much to pay
everyone says you are not paying anything mum
etc etc
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Just pretend to go to the toilet and pay while no one is looking. Then you are a hero and those relatives who give a shot will force you to have more money than they really owe in the car park.MrOneLung said:
Restaurants are a minefield especially if some are non drinkersiainment said:
If it’s a couple of quid I don’t mind. But if it’s a tenner or more I do. I’m not on my uppers but money is tight for me and I can’t afford to sub a sponger.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I can't generally afford to do it too often, but on the odd occasion we do go out, we can usually afford the extra couple of quid to split it, even if the people we're with have a more expensive option. I don't think I've ever been in the company of someone who skips the starters, everyone has the full coursesiainment said:
Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.
Even with family, although usually with us it is people trying to pay more
Was out last weekend:
Me, wife , two kids under 10
Brother in law and sister in law
Brother in law, sister in law and two kids 14 + 17
Mother in law
Brother in law and sister in law say just split 3 ways.
we say not fair as only two of you
Other brother in law says but your kids only had kids meals
we say but your wife was only drinking tap water
Mother in law says just let me know how much to pay
everyone says you are not paying anything mum
etc etc0 -
Alwaysneil said:
Just pretend to go to the toilet and slip out when no one is looking. Then you are a swine and those relatives will never put you through such hassle ever again.MrOneLung said:
Restaurants are a minefield especially if some are non drinkersiainment said:
If it’s a couple of quid I don’t mind. But if it’s a tenner or more I do. I’m not on my uppers but money is tight for me and I can’t afford to sub a sponger.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I can't generally afford to do it too often, but on the odd occasion we do go out, we can usually afford the extra couple of quid to split it, even if the people we're with have a more expensive option. I don't think I've ever been in the company of someone who skips the starters, everyone has the full coursesiainment said:
Fair enough if you can afford to. I just don't like someone spending my money for me on stuff for them.i_b_b_o_r_g said:
I'd still split the bill down the middleiainment said:I always buy my round but want to pay in restaurants for what I have ordered.
I know someone who, in restaurants, will always order the most expensive stuff. Always have as many courses as there are on offer. Always have a brandy or two at the end of a meal and then say we'll split the bill evenly. I usually just have a main and dessert.
I worked out once I was paying at least a third more for him.
So won't now accept equal split, which sometimes mean I might pay a bit more but I won't feel angry or duped.
Even with family, although usually with us it is people trying to pay more
Was out last weekend:
Me, wife , two kids under 10
Brother in law and sister in law
Brother in law, sister in law and two kids 14 + 17
Mother in law
Brother in law and sister in law say just split 3 ways.
we say not fair as only two of you
Other brother in law says but your kids only had kids meals
we say but your wife was only drinking tap water
Mother in law says just let me know how much to pay
everyone says you are not paying anything mum
etc etc
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I had a farcical one of these scenarios in a restaurant in Covent Garden some years back.
I got so annoyed with the petty to-ing and fro-ing that I just upped and payed the bill for about eight of us.
I can honestly say it was one of the most satisfying things I have ever done, to see good old friends ‘beginning’ to squabble over a few quid here and there, after such a lovely meal and sociable evening, was simply too much for me to take on board.
Think one or two of them felt a bit guilty the following day…..and so they damn well should have.
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Always a great way to blow them into the water and walk out with the chest extra pumped.SoundAsa£ said:I had a farcical one of these scenarios in a restaurant in Covent Garden some years back.
I got so annoyed with the petty to-ing and fro-ing that I just upped and payed the bill for about eight of us.
I can honestly say it was one of the most satisfying things I have ever done, to see good old friends ‘beginning’ to squabble over a few quid here and there, after such a lovely meal and sociable evening, was simply too much for me to take on board.
Think one or two of them felt a bit guilty the following day…..and so they damn well should have.1 -
A very nice sentiment from you there Nick and credit to you.Addickted said:FFS, some of you are right whingers.
It's a mate, so what if he doesn't pull his weight on a round or at a meal? He may struggle financially, he may be a bit tight, but he's a mate. None of us are perfect and I expect he puts up with our little foibles. Can't believe how many of you bother to 'count' how many drinks you've bought each other.
If I could pay for everything every time I went out with mates, then I would. None of my mates would allow me to do that (apart from probably @Henry Irving). Because they're mates.
So you spend more money than them, so what?
Build a bridge and get over it.
However there are two distinct types of these individuals.
I don’t much like either, some are just plain tightwads and are bad enough, who want to dissect every bloody item.
But the ones I really can’t stand are the ones who grab the bill or whip and then set about eking it out to their own advantage…..I have one old acquaintance who has a reputation for this…..his wife knows full well what he’s up to as well!
Some of us don’t stand for it…..and some do.1 -
If someone orders an item which is much more expensive then they should cough up more.
I was out with couple of mates and they ordered a bottle of wine that was over £30, I was just drinking lager.
Get the bill, my mates went halves on the wine, I paid for my lager and we split the cost of the food.1 -
About 5 years ago I went on a few dates with a woman who was about my age at the time - 30 odd. I wasn’t too sure if there was much of a connection there but thought it was worth a few meets to see.
Now, I have no issue in being the gentleman and buying dinner, drinks etc. But across the 4-5 dates we had, she didn’t put her hand in her purse once and never once offered.The last time we met up was for dinner at a TGI Friday (Not the most glamorous I know). Of course I paid for everything again. We finished up and were heading back to the tube station, until she shrieked and turned and ran back to the restaurant.I’d assumed she’d forgotten her purse or something, so just wandered behind her on the way back. She got to the restaurant, I waited outside, and she burst out to the entrance in relief with the receipt in hand.
”Forgot to get the points logged on my loyalty app”I told my mates about it and they gave her the nickname “feeder”, cos they reckoned she would only call me when she’s hungry.20
